\mmo 


V.  LIBRARY^/ 


mumi^- 


"^^HOiiwm 


0%. 


I1VIR%.         ,  ,^lOS-ANGELi 


o 


iE-yNiVhk^y^ 


O    i 


^/?a3Aii 


'vl/i/n  JIT 


^lOSANf-1 


%a3AINrHH' 


Awaar 


SS'lH 


Digitized  by  \he  Internet  Arcinive 
in  2013 


littp://archive.org/details/plunkittoftammanyOOrior 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 


/. 


PREFACE  ;^  3  I  9 


PREFACE 

1  HIS  volume  discloses  the  mental  oper- 
ations of  perhaps  the  most  thoroughly  prac- 
tical politician  of  the  day  —  George  Wash- 
ington Plunkitt,  Tammany  leader  of  the 
Fifteenth  Assembly  District,  Sachem  of  the 
Tammany  Society  and  Chairman  of  the 
Elections  Committee  of  Tammany  Hall, 
who  has  held  the  offices  of  State  Senator 
Assemblyman,  Police  Magistrate,  County 
Supervisor  and  Alderman  and  who  boasts 
of  his  record  in  filling  four  public  offices  in 
one  year  and  drawing  salaries  from  three  of 
them  at  the  same  time. 

The  discourses  that  follow  were  delivered 
by  him  from   his   rostrum,   the   bootblack 

[iii] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

stand  in  the  County  Court-house,  at  various 
times  in  the  last  half-dozen  years.  Their  ab- 
solute frankness  and  vigorous  unconvention- 
ality  of  thought  and  expression  charmed  me. 
Plunkitt  said  right  out  what  all  practical  poli- 
ticians think  but  are  afraid  to  say.  Some  of 
the  discourses  I  published  as  interviews  in 
the  New  York  Evening  Post,  the  New  York 
Sun,  the  New  York  World,  and  the  Boston 
Transcript  They  were  reproduced  in  news- 
papers throughout  the  country  and  several 
of  them,  notably  the  talks  on  "The  Curse  of 
Civil  Service  Reform"  and  "Honest  Graft 
and  Dishonest  Graft"  became  subjects  of 
discussion  in  the  United  States  Senate  and  in 
college  lectures.  There  seemed  to  be  a  gen- 
eral recognition  of  Plunkitt  as  a  striking  type 
of  the  practical  politician,  a  politician,  more- 
over, who  dared  to  say  publicly  what  others 
in  his  class  whisper  among  themselves  in  the 
City  Hall  corridors  and  the  hotel  lobbies. 

[iv] 


PREFACE 

I  thought  it  a  pity  to  let  Plunkitt's  revela- 
tions of  himself  —  as  frank  in  their  way  as 
Rousseau's  "Confessions" — perish  in  the 
files  of  the  newspapers;  so  I  collected  the 
talks  I  had  published,  added  several  new 
ones  and  now  give  to  the  world  in  this 
volume  a  system  of  political  philosophy 
which  is  as  unique  as  it  is  refreshing. 

No  New  Yorker  needs  to  be  informed  who 
George  Washington  Plunkitt  is.  For  the  in- 
formation of  others,  the  following  sketch  of 
his  career  is  given.  He  was  born,  as  he  proud- 
ly tells,  in  Central  Park;  that  is,  in  the  terri- 
tory now  included  in  the  park.  He  began  life 
as  a  driver  of  a  cart,  then  became  a  butcher's 
boy,  and  later  went  into  the  butcher  bus- 
iness for  himself.  How  he  entered  politics  he 
explains  in  one  of  his  discourses.  His  ad- 
vancement was  rapid.  He  was  in  the  Assem- 
bly soon  after  he  cast  his  first  vote  and  has 
held  oflBce  most  of  the  time  for  forty  years. 

[v] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
In  1870,  through  a  strange  combination  of 
circumstances,  he  held  the  places  of  Assem- 
blyman, Alderman,  Police  Magistrate  and 
County  Supervisor  and  drew  three  salaries 
at  once  —  a  record  unexampled  in  New 
York  politics. 

Plunkitt  is  now  a  millionaire.  He  owes  his 
fortune  mainly  to  his  political  pull,  as  he  con- 
fesses in  "Honest  Graft  and  Dishonest 
Graft."  The  character  of  his  business  he  also 
describes  fully.  He  is  in  the  contracting, 
transportation,  real  estate,  and  every  other 
business  out  of  which  he  can  make  money. 
He  has  no  office.  His  headquarters  is  the 
County  Court-house  bootblack  stand. 
There  he  receives  his  constituents,  transacts 
his  general  business  and  pours  forth  his 
philosophy. 

Plunkitt  has  been  one  of  the  great  powers 
in  Tammany  Hall,  for  a  quarter  of  a  cen- 
tury. While  he  was  in  the  Assembly  and 

[vi] 


PREFACE 
the  State  Senate  he  was  one  of  the  most 
influential  members  and  introduced  the  bills 
that  provided  for  the  outlying  parks  of  New 
York  City,  the  Harlem  River  Speedway,  the 
Washington  Bridge,  the  155th  Street  Viad- 
uct, the  grading  of  Eighth  Avenue  north  of 
Fifty-seventh  Street,  additions  to  the  Museum 
of  Natural  History,  the  West  Side  Court,  and 
many  other  important  public  improvements. 
He  is  one  of  the  closest  friends  and  most 
valued  advisers  of  Charles  F.  Murphy,  lead- 
er of  Tammany  Hall. 

William  L.  Riordon. 


[yii] 


CONTENTS 

Honest  Graft  and  Dishonest  Graft 


How  to  BecomI 


STATESMAN 


PAGE 


11 


The  Curse  of  Civil  Service  Reform  ^t^-^^^fC^  19 
Reformers  only  Mornin '-glories  "  Jiiyt'^^'-^-'f^  30 
New  York  City  is  Pie  for  the  Hayseeds -r^  f^^fif^-^^/**^^ 
To  Hold  Your  District — Study   Human   Nature 

AND  Act  Accordin'-  ^^  ff"  t    .     .     'r'  46 
On  "The  Shame  of  The  Cities"      ,     . 
Ingratitude  in  Politics       .,     vy  •  -  ^ 
Reciprocity  in  Patronage   .... 


Am. 


Brooklynites  Natural-born  TIayseeds 
Tammany  Leaders  not  Bookworms    . 
Dangers  of  the  Dress-suit  in  Politics 
On  Municipal  Ownership    .     .     .     . 
Tammany  the  only  Lastin'  Democracy 


54 
62 
70 
77 
84 
93 
100 
106 


CONTENTS 

PAGE 

Concerning  Gas  in  Politics 113 

Plunkitt's  Fondest  Dream 121 

Tammany's  Patriotism 127 

On  the  Use  of  Money  in  Politics    .      .      .     .135 
The  Successful  Politician  Does  not  Drink    .     143 

Bosses  Preserve  the  Nation 150 

Coi«JcERNiNG  Excise 156 

A  Parting  Word  on  the  Future  of  the  Demo- 
cratic Party 163 

Strenuous    Life     of      the    Tammany    District 

Leader -. 167 


INTRODUCTION 

A   TRIBUTE    TO   PLUNKITT    BY    THE    LEADER 
OF  TAMMANY   HALL 

Senator  plunkitt  is  a  straight 

organization  man.  He  believes  in  party 
government ;  he  does  not  indulge  in  cant 
and  hypocrisy  and  he  is  never  afraid  to  say 
exactly  what  he  thinks.  He  is  a  believer  in 
thorough  political  organization  and  all-the- 
year-around  work  and  he  holds  to  the  doc- 
trine that,  in  making  appointments  to  office, 
party  workers  should  be  preferred  if  they 
are  fitted  to  perform  the  duties  of  the  office. 
Plunkitt  is  one  of  the  veteran  leaders  of  the 
organization,  he  has  always  been  faithful 
and  reliable  and  he  has  performed  valuable 
services  for  Tammany  Hall. 

Charles  F.  Murphy, 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 


/ 


HONEST    GRAFT   AND    DISHONEST    GRAFT 

"Everybody  is  talkin'  these  days 
about  Tammany  men  growin'  rich  on  graft, 
but  nobody  thinks  of  drawin'  the  distinction 
between  honesty g^aft  and  dishonest  graft. 
There  's  all  the  difference  in  the  world  be- 
tween the  two.  Yes,  many  of  our  men  have 
grown  rich  in  politics.  I  have  myself.  I  've 
made  a  big  fortune  out  of  the  game,  and  I  'm 
gettin'  richer  every  day,  but  I  've  not  gone  in 
for  dishonest  graft  —  blackmailin'  gamblers, 
saloon-keepers,  disorderly  people,  etc.  —  and 
neither  has  any  of  the  men  who  have  made 
big  fortunes  in  politics. 

*' There  [s  an  honest  graft,  and  I  'm  an  ex- 
ample of  how  it  works.  I  might  sum  up  the 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

whole  thing  by  say  in' :  *  I  seen  my  opportune 
ities  andjr^oQW  'prn.' 

"Just  let  me  explain  by  examples.  My 
party 's  in  power  in  the  city,  and  it 's  goin'  to 
undertake  a  lot  of  public  improvements. 
Well,  I  'm  tipped  off,  say,  that  they  're^going 
to  lay  out  a  new  park  at  a  certain^ace. 

**I  see  ihy  opportunity  and  I  take  itJ^go 
to  that  place  and  I  buy  up  all  the  land  I  can 
in  the  neighborhood.  Then  the  board  of  this 
or  that  makes  its  plan  public,  and  there  is  a 
rush  to  get  my  land,  which  nobody  cared 
particular  for  before. 

"Ain't  it  perfectly  honest  to  charge  a  good 
price  and  make  a  profit  on  my  investment 


^nd  fore^iprfat't''OFcourse,  it  is.  Well,  that 's 
honest  graft. 

.  *"Or,  supposin'  it 's  a  new  bridge  they  're 
goin'  to  build.  I  get  tipped  off  and  I  buy  as 
much  property_asj  can  that  has  to  be  taken 
for  approaches.  I  sell  at  my  own  price  later 

6 


HONEST  AND  DISHONEST  GRAFT 

on  and  drop  some  more  money  in  the 
bank. 

"Wouldn't  you?  It 's^justJi^S^ooki^^ 
ahead  in  Wall^treet  or  in  the  coffee  or  cot- 
ton market.  It 's  honest  graft,  and  I  'm  look- 
in'  for  it  every  day  in  the  year.  I  will  tell  you 
frankly  that  I  've  got  a  good  lot  of  it,  too. 

"  I  '11  tell  you  of  one  case.  They  were  goin' 
to  fix  up  a  big  park,  no  matter  where.  I  got 
on  to  it,  and  went  lookin'  about  for  land  in 
that  neighborhood. 

"  I  could  get  nothin'  at  a  bargain  but  a  big 
piece  of  swamp,  but  I  took  it  fast  enough  and 
held  on  to  it.  What  turned  out  was  just  what 
I  counted  on.  They  could  n't  make  the  park 
complete  without  Plunkitt's  swamp,  and 
they^hadto  pay  a  good  price  for  it.  Anything 
dishonest  intEafT'"'""^ 

"Up  in  the  watershed  I  made  some 
money,  too.  I  bought  up  several  bits  of  land 
there  some  years  ago  and  made  a  pretty  good 


^A 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
guess   that  they  would   be  bought  up  for 
water  purposes  later  by  the  city. 

"  Somehow.  I  always  guessed  about  right, 
and  should  n't  I  enjoy  the  profit  of  my  fore- 
sight? It  was  rather  amusiif^^^Keirthe  con- 
demnation commissioners  came  along  and 
found  piece  after  piece  of  the  land  in  the 
name  of  GeorgePlunkittof  the  Fifteenth  As- 
sembly District,  New  York  City.  They  won- 
dered how  I  knew  just  what  to  buy.  The  an- 
swer is  —  I  seen,  .my  oppgrtmiityjindj^took 
_iL_I^have  n't  confined  myself  to  land;  any- 

^ 

thing  that  pays  is  in  my  line. 

"For  instance,  the  city  is  repavin'  a  street 
and  has  several  hundred  thousand  old  gran- 
ite blocks  to  sell.  I  am  on  hand  to  buy,  and  I 
know  just  what  they  are  worth. 

"  How .?  Never  mind  that.  I  had  a  sort  of 
monopoly  of  this  business  for  a  while,  but 
once  a  newspaper  tried  to  do  me.  It  got 
some    outside    men    ta    come    over    from 


HONEST  AND  DISHONEST   GRAFT 
Brooklyn  and  New  Jersey  to  bid   against 
me. 

**  Was  I  done  ?  Not  much.  I  went  to  each 
of  the  men  and  said:  'How  many  of  these 
250,000  stones  do  you  want.?'  One  said  20,- 
000,  and  another  wanted  15,000,  and  an- 
other wanted  10,000.  I  said:  'All  right,  let 
me  bid  for  the  lot,  and  I  '11  give  each  of  you 
all  you  want  for  nothin'. 

"They  agreed,  of  pmugp^  TVipn  jjie  au^- 
tioneer  yelledhJJB[ow^mch  am  I  bid  for  these 
250,d00  fine  pavin'  stones  ? ' 

'"Two  dollars  and  fifty  cents,'  says  I. 

"'Two  dollars  and  fifty  cents!'  screamed 
the  auctioneer. '  Oh,  that 's  a  joke !  Give  me  a 
real  bid.' 

"He  found  the  bid  was  real  enough.  My 
rivals  stood  silent.  I  got  the  lot  for  $2.50  and 
gave  them  their  share.  That 's  how  the  at- 
tempt to  do  Plunkitt  ended,  and  that 's  how 
all  such  attempts  en< 

(E7] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
*I  've  told  you  how  I  got  rich_bj;_honest 
graft.    Now,    let    me    tell    you    that    most 
politicians  who  are  accused  of  robbin'  the 
city  get  rich  the  same  way. 

"They  didji't  steal  a  dollar  from  the  city 
treasury.  They  just  seen  their  opportunities 
and  took  them.  That  is  why,  when  a  reform 
administration  comes  in  and  spends  a  half 
million  dollars  in  tryin'  to^iind  the  public 
robberies  they  talked^boiit^LaJJiecam- 
paign,  they  dqnTlSnd  them. 
•  "The  books  are  always  all  right.  The 
money  in  the  city  treasury  is  all  right.  Every- 
thing is  all  right.  All  they  can  show  is  that  the 
Tammg^nyjieads  of  departments  looked  after 
theJT  friends,  within  the  law,  and  gave  them 
what  opportunities  they  could  to  naal^hon- 
est  g^raft.  Now,  let  me  tell  you  that 's  never 
goin'  to  hurt  Tammany  with  the  people. 
Every  good  man,^o^ks^  f^ftf r  jiiiS  fripnfh;^  and 
any  man  who  does  n^^s  n't  likely  to  be  pop- 


HONEST  AND   DISHONEST   GRAFT 
ular.  Tf  JThpyp  a  goQifjJjhing  to  hand  out  in  / 
private   life,    I   give   it   to    a  friend.    Why  \/ 
should^t  I  do  the  same  in  pubHc  Hfe  ? 
"  Another  kind  of  honest  graft.  Tammany 

.<■*"'  '  '"Win, 

has  raised  a  good  many  salaries.  There_was 
an  awful  howl  by  the  reformers,  but  don't 
you  know  that  Tammany  gams^ten  votes  for 
every  one  it  lost  by  salary  raisin'  ? 

"  The  Wall  Street  banker  thinks  it  shame- 
ful to  raise  a  department  clerk's  salary  from 
$1500  to  $1800  a  year,  but  every  man  who 
draws  a  salary  himself  says :  *  That 's  all 
right.  I  wish  it  was  me.'  An^Jiefeels^yery 
much  like  votin'  the  Tammany  ticket  on 
election  day,  just  out  of  sympathy. 

"Tammany  was~beat~in  1901  because  the 
people  were  deceived  into  belieyiril  that  it 
worked  dishonest  graft.  They  did  n't  draw  a 
distinction  between  ^dishonest  and  honest 
graf t  Jput  they^saw  that  some  Tammany  men 
grew  rich,  and  supposed  they  had  been  rob- 


X 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

bin'  the  city  treasury  or  levyin'  blackmail  on 
disorderly  houses,  or  workin'  in  with  the 
v_gamblers  and  lawbreakers. 

"As  a  matter  of  policy,  if  nothing  else, 
why  should  the  Tammany  leaders  go  into 
such  dirty  business,  when  there  is  so  much 
honest  graft  lyin'  around  when  they  are  in 
^ower?  Did  you  ever  consider  that? 

'*  Now,  in  conclusion,  I  want  to  say  that  I 
don't  own  a  dishonest  dollar.  If'  my  worst 
enemy  was  given  the  job  of  writin'  my 
epitaph  when  I  'm  gone,  he  could  n't  do 
more  than  write: 

"'George  W.  Plunkitt.  He^een  His  Op- 
portunities, and  He  Took  'Em, 


J  5? 


HOW   TO    BECOME   A    STATESMAN 

1  HERE  'S  thousands  of  young  men  in 
this  city  who  will  go  to  the  polls  for  the  first 
time  next  November.  Among  them  will  be 
many  who  have  watched  the  careers  of  suc- 
cessful men  in  politics,  and  who  are  longin'  to 
make  names  and  fortunes  for  themselves  at 
the  same  game.  It  is  to  these  youths  that  I 
want  to  give  advice.  First,  let  me  say  that  I  am 
in  a  position  to  give  what  the  courts  call  ex- 
pert testimony  on  the  subject.  I  don't  think 
you  can  easily  find  a  better  example  than  I 
am  of  success  in  politics.  After  forty  years' 
experience  at  the  game  I  am  —  well,  I  'm 
George  Washington  Plunkitt.  Everybody 
knows  what  figure  I  cut  in  the  greatest  or- 

[11] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
ganization  on  earth,  and  if  you  hear  people 
say  that  I  've  laid  away  a.milliojior  so  since  I 
was_a  butcher's  boy  in  WashingtonM^fket, 
don't  come  to. jne_fQL_^Ln_iiidignant_denial. 
I  'm  pretty  comfortable,  thank  you. 

''Now,  havin'  qualified  as  an  expert,  as 
the  lawyers  say,  I  ^m  gm'n'  tn  giY^_^v^<^^ 
free  to  the  young  men  who  are  ^oin'  to  cast 
their  first  votes,  and  who  are  lookin'  forward 
^al_glory  and  lots  of  cash.  Some 
young  men  think  they  can  learn  how  to  be 
successful  in  politics  from  books,  and  they 
cram  their  heads  with  all  sorts  of  college  rot. 
They  could  n't  make  a  bigger  mistake  Now, 
understand  me,  I  ain't  sayin'  nothin'  against 
colleges.  I  guess  they  '11  have  to  exist  as  long 
as  there  's  bookworms,  and  I  suppose  they 
do  some  good  in  a  certain  way,  but  theydon't 
£Ountin  politics.  In  fact,  a  young  man  who 
has  gone  through  the  college  course  is  handi- 
capped at  the  outset.  He  may  succeed  in  pol- 


TO   BECOME  A  STATESMAN 

itics,  but  the  chances  are  100  to  1  against 
him. 

"Another  mistake;  some  young  men  think 


that  the  best  way  to  prepare  for  the  pohtical 
game  is  to  practise^peakm^  and  becomin^ 
orators.  Phat 's  all  wrong.  We  've  got  some 
orators  in  Tammany  Hall,  but  they  're 
chiefly  ornamental.  You  never  heard  of 
^  Charlie  Murphy  delivering  a  speech,  did 
you  ?  Or  Richard  Croker,  or  John  Kelly,  or 
any  other  man  who  has  been  a^eal  power  in 
the  organization  ?  Look  at  the  thirty-six 
district  leaders  of  Tammany  Hall  to-day. 
How  many  of  them  travel  on  their  tongues  ? 
Maybe  one  or  two,  and  they  don't  count 
when  business  is  doin'  at  Tammany  Hall. 
The  men  who  rule  have  practised  keepin' 
their  tongues  still,  not  exercisin'  them.  So 
you  want  to  drop  the  orator  idea  unless  you 
mean  to  go  into  politics  just  to  perform  the 
sky-rocket  act.  ^ 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
"Now,  I  Ve  told  you  what  not  to  do;  I 
guess  I  can  explain  best  what  to  do  to  suc- 
ceed in  politics  by  tellin'  you  what  I  did. 
After  goilLJfel2H2jL^  apprenticeship  of  the 
business  while_j[  was  aiBoy  T5y_  wo^in' 
around  the  districtjiea d qu arters^^and  hust- 
lin'  about  the  polls  nn  plprtion  f|jgy.  I  set  out 
when  I  cast  my  first  vote  to  win  fame  and 
money  in  New  York  city  politics.  Did  I  offer 
my  services  to  the  district  leader  as  a  stump- 
speaker  ?  Not  much.  The  woods  are  always 
full  of  speakers.  Did  I  get  up  a  book  on  mu- 
nicipal government  and  show  it  to  the  leader  ? 
I  was  n't  such  a  fool.  What  I  did  was  to  get 
^^  some  marketable  goods  before  goin'  to  the 
leaders.  What  do  I  mean  by  marketable 
goods  ?  Let  me  tell  you :  I  had  a  cousin,  a 
young  man  who  did  n't  take  any  particular 
interest  in  politics.  I  went  to  him  and  said: 
*  Tommy,  I  'm  goin'  to  be  a  politician,  and  I 
want  to  get  a  folio  win' ;  can  I  count  on  you  ? ' 


TO  BECOME  A  STATESMAN 
He  said : '  Sure,  George.'  That 's  how  I  start- 
ed in  business.  I  gotamarketable  commod- 
ity —  one  vote.  Then  I  went  to  the  district 
leader  and  told  him  I  could  command  two 
votes^njlection  day,  Tommy  s_and  my  own. 
He  smiled  on  me  and  told  me  to  go  ahead.  If 
I  had  offered  him  a  speech  or  a  bookful  of 
learnin',  he  would  have  said,-^~Oh.,JorggJ:  it!' 
"That  was  beginnin'  business  in  a  small 
way,  was  n't  it  ?  But  that  is  the  only  way  to 
become  a  real  lastin'  statesman.  I  soon 
branched  out.  Two  young  men  in  the  flat 
next  to  mine  were  school  friends.  I  went  to 
them,  just  as  I  went  to  Tommy,  and  they 
agreed  to  stand  by  me.  Then  I  had  a  follow- 
in  ^JIEJJlre£L:^oters^an^JLbegan  to  get  a  bit 
chesty.  Whenever  I  dropped  into  district 
headquarters,  everybody  shook  hands  with 
me,  and  the  leader  one  day  honored  me  by 
lightin'  a  match  for  my  cigar.  And  so  it  went 
on  like  a  snowball  rollin'  down  a  Tiilt:   I 

1^ 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
worked  the  flat-house  that  I  Hved  in  from  the 

'■^'>-   -tr  '   '"  .I..— — — ^-  ^^^  I    II  I  ■will  I  ■  I 

basement  to  the  top  floor^^aiid  I  got  about  a 
dozen  youngmen  to  Jollow-me.  Then  I 
f ackledTIie  next  house  and  so  on  down  the 
block  and  around  the  corner.  Before  long  I 
had  sixty  men  back  of  me,  and  formed  the 
George  Washington  Plunkitt  Association. 

"What  did  the  district  leader  say  then 
when  I  called  at  headquarters  ?  I  did  n't 
have  to  call  at  headquarters.  He  came  after 
me  and  said : '  George,  what  do  you  want  ?I{ 
you  don't  see  what  you  want,  ask  for  it. 
Would  n'tj^^^ou  JikeJo_liave_^  in 

the  departments  Joxjyour  friends?'  I  said: 
'I '11  think  it  over;  I  haven't  yet  decided 
what  the  George  Washington  Plunkitt  Asso- 
ciation will  do  in  the  next  campaign.'  You 
ought  to  have  seen  how  I  was  courted  and 
petted  then  by  the  leaders  of  the  rival  organi- 
zations. I  had  marketable  goods  and  Jjhprp 
was  bids  for  them  froiji  all  sides,  and  I  was  a 


TO  BECOME  A  STATESMAN 
risin'  man  in  politics.  As  time  went  on,  and 
my  association  grew,  I  thought  I  would  like 
to  go  to  the  Assembly.  I  just  had  to  hint  at 
what  I  wanted,  and  three  different  organiza- 
tion^ffered  me  the  nomination.  Afterwards, 
I  went  to  the  Board  of  Aldermen,  then  to  the 
State  Senate,  then  became  leader  of  the  dis- 
trict, and  so.  on  up  and  up  till  I  became  a 
statesman. 

"That  is  the  way  and  the  only  way  to 
make  a  lastin'  success  in  politics.  If  you  are 
goin'  to  cast  your  first  vote  next  November 
and  want  to  go  into  politics,  do  as  I  did.  Get  a 
following  if  it 's  only  one  man,  and  then  go 
to  the  district  leader  and  say :  *  I  want  to  join 
the  organization.  I  've  got  one  man  who  '11 
follow  me  through  thick  and  thin'.  The 
leader  won't  laugh  at  your  one-man  f  ollowin'. 
He  '11  shake  your  hand  warmly,  offer  to  pro- 
pose you  for  membership  in  his  club,  take 
you  down  to  the  corner  for  a  drink  and  ask 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
you  to  call  again.  But  go  to  him  and  say:  'I 
took  first  prize  at  college  in  Aristotle;  I  can 
recite  all  Shakspere  forwards  and  back- 
wards; there  ain't  nothin'  in  science  that 
ain't  as  familiar  to  me  as  blockades  on  the 
elevated  roads  and  I  'm  the  real  thing  in  the 
way  of  silver-tongued  orators.'  What  will  he 
answer  ?  He  '11  probably  say :  'I  guess  you 
are  not  to  blame  for  your  misfortunes,  but 
^^  have  nu  use  for_you  here.'" 


[18] 


THE    CURSE   OF    CIVIL   SERVICE 
REFORM 

1  HIS  civil  service  law  is  the  biggest  fraud 
of  the  age.  It  is  the  curse  rf  the  nation.  There 
can't  be  no  real  patriotism  while  it  lasts.  How 
are  you  goin'  to  interest  our^qung  men  in 
their  couritiy--jfc::yoii.^jve^no  offices  to  give 
them  when  they  workfor  Jjti£ir_party  ?  Just 
look  atthingsin  this  city  to-day.  There  are 
ten  thousand  good  offices,  but  we  can't  get 
at  more  than  a  few  hundred  of  them.  How  are 
we  goin'  to  provide  for  the  thousands  of  men 
who_worked  f^r^the  Tammany  ticket  ?  It 
can't  be  done.  These  men  were  full  of  patri- 
otism a  short  time  ago.  They  expected  to  be 
servin'  their  city ,  but  wiien  we  teltthem  that 
we  can't  place  them,  do  yjooiihiiikJlieir  patri- 


PLUNKITT  OF  TiMMANY  HALL 

otism  is  goin^to  last  ?  Not  much.  They  say: 
*  What 's  the  use  of  workin'  for  your  country 
anyhow  ?  There  's  nothin'  in  the  game.'  And 
what  can  they  do  ?  I  don't  know,  but  I  '11  tell 
you  what  I  do  know.  I  know  more  than  one 
young  man  in  past  years  who  worked  for  the 
ticket  and^jw^^jusLoyerflbmnl^with^ 
ism,  but  when  he  was^iiQcked^out  by  the 
civil  service  humbug  he  got  to  hate  his  coun- 
try  andbecame  an^ Anarchist. 

"This  ain't  no  exaggeration.  I  have  good 
reason  for  sayin'  that  most  of  the  Anarcliists 
in  this  city  to-day  are  men  who  ran  up 
against  civil  service  examinations.  Is  n't  it 
enough  to  make  a  man  sour  on  his  country 
when  he  wants  to  serve  it  and  won't  be  al- 
lowed unless  he  answers  a  lot  of  fool  ques- 
tions airout  the  number  of  cubic  inches  of 


water  in  the  Atlantic  and  the  quality  of^sand 
in  the  Sahara  desert  ?  There  was  once  a 
bright  young  man  inmy^district  who  tackled 


CURSE   OF  CIVIL  SERVICE  REFORM 

one  of  these  examinations.  The  next  I  heard 
of  him  he  had  settled  down  in  Herr  Most's 
saloon  smokin'  and  drinkin'  beer  and  talkin' 
socialism  all  day.  Before  that  time  he  had 
never  drank  anything  but  whisky.  I  knew 
what  was  comin'  when  a  young  Irishman  ^^ 
drops  whisky  and  takes  to  beer  and  long 
pipes  in  a  German  saloon.  That  young  man 
is  to-day  one  of  the  wildest  Anarchists  in 
town.  And  just  to  think!  He  mighLbe  a  pa- 
triot but  for  that  cussed  civil  service. 

"Say,  did  you  hearaBoutTtiat  Civil  Ser- 
vice Reform  Association  kickin'  because  the 
tax  commissioners  want  to  put  their  fifty- 
five  deputies  on  the  exempt  list,  and  fire  the 
outfit  left  to  them  by  Low  ?  That  's  civil  ser- 
vice for  you.  Just  think!  Fifty-five  Republi- 
cans and  mugwumps  holdin'  $3000  and 
$4000  and  $5000  jobs  in  the  tax  department 
when  1555  good  Tammany  men  are  ready 
and  willin'  to  take  their  places !  It 's  an  out- 

[21] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
rage!  Wlrgt  did  the, people^rQeRn  when  thpy 
voted  for  Tammaity,.  Wtiatis  represejajt^^ 
government,  anyhow  ?  Is  it  all  a  fake  that 
this  is  a  government  of  the  people,  by  the 
people  and  for  the  people  ?  If  it  is  n't  a  fake, 
then  why  is  n't  the  people's  voice  obeyed  and 
Tanim^liy:jiie»--p«%--4«-^~th^e--oJ05ces  ? 

"When  the  people  elected  Tammany, 
they  knew  iusF"wEaTTKey^  were  doi'n'.  We 
didlTt  put  up  any  false  pretences.  We  did  n't 
go  in  for  humbug^^iviLseryice  and  all  that 
rdtrWe  stood  as  we  have  always  stood^forje- 
wardin'  the  men  that  won  the  victory.  They 
call  that  the  spoils  system.  All  right;  Tam- 
many is  for  the  spoils  system^  _and  when  we 
go  in-  we  fire  ^v^ry  anti -Tarn many  ^f^n  fj^rrt 
oflSce  that  can  be  fired  under^Jie  law.  It 's  an 
elastic  sort  of  law  and  you  can  bet  it  will  be 
stretched  to  the  limit.  Of  course  the  Repub- 
lican State  Civil  Service  Board  will  stand  in 
the  way  of  our  local  Giyil  Service  Commis- 


CURSE   OF   CIVIL  SERVICE   REFORM 

sion  all  it  can ;  but  say !  —  suppose  we  carry 
the  State  some  time  won't  we  fire  the  up- 
State  Board  all  right  ?  Or  we'll  make  it  work 
in  harmony  with  the  local  board,  and  that 
means  that  Tammany  will  get  everything  in 
sight.  I  lgiow4hatJhe  civil  service  humbug  is 
stuck  into  the  constitution,  too,  but,  as  Tim 
Campbell  said : ilffliiatjs  the  constitution 
among  fnends  ?| 

*  ',.Say^Jiie^eoj)le  j^  yoice^^ 
tli£LjcaiiS£d.crvn_s<^^  of  ^ 

all  evil  in  our  gov^^aunent.  You  hear  of  this 
thing  or  that  thing  goin'  wrong  in  the  nation, 
the  State  or  the  city.  Look  down  beneath  the 
surface  anjj^iJ^j&anJLxace^vgrything  wrong 
to  civil  service.  I  have  studied  the  subject 
and  I  know.  The  civil  service  humbug  is 
underminin'  our  institutions  and  if  a  halt 
ain't  called  soon  this  great  republic  will 
tumble  down  like  a  P^iik^iavenue  house 
when  they  were  buildin'  the  subway,  and 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

on  its  ruins-will  rise  another  JSiissian  gov- 
ernment. 

"This  is  an  awful  serious  proposition. 
Free  silver  and  the  tariff  and  imperialism 
and  the  Panama  Canal  are  triflin'  issues 
when  compared  to  it.  We  could  worry  along 
without  any  of  these  things,  but  civil  service 
is  sappin'  the  foundation  of  the  whole  shoot- 
in'  match.  Let  me  argue  it  out  for  vou^I  ain't 
^RQQ^sjllygisms,  but  I  can  give  you  some  ar- 
guments_tliat  nobody  can^nswer. 

"  First  this  great  and  glorious  country  was 
built  up^Ly  jjioEtical  parties;  second,  parties 
can't  hold  together  if  their  workers  don't  get 
the  offices  when  theyjyin;  third  if  the  par- 
ties go  to  pieces,  the  government  they  built 
^^P  niLL^i_£;[l  ^^  pieceSj^  too;  fourth,  then 
thereJJ^be  h  —  to  pay. 

"Could  anything  be  clearer  than  that? 
Say,  honest  now;  can  you  answer  that  argu- 
ment.? Of  course  you  won't  deny  that  the 


CURSE  OF  CIVIL  SERVICE  REFORM 
government  was  built  up  by  the  great  par- 
ties. That  's  history 7^S3~ybu  can't  go  back 
of  the  returns.  As  to  my  second  proposition, 
you  can't  deny  that  either.  WhgHDarties 
can't  get  offices,  they^ll  bust.  They  ain't  far 
from  the  bustin'  point  now,  with  all  this  civil 
service  business  keepin'  most  of  the  good 
things  from  them.  How  are^mi^goin'  to  keep 
up  patriotism  if  this  thing  goesjon  ?  You  can't 
do  it.  Let  me  tell  you  that  patriotism  has 
been  dying  out  fast  for  the  lasFfwerrty  years. 
Before  then  wKen"  a  party  won,~~its  workers  Vx^ 
igot  everything  in  sight.  'I'haT  waa-sopethin'  /  \ 


^  >t  everythingm_sight.  'ihaT^waa^sagjethin' 
to  make  a  man  patriotic.  Now,  when  a  party 
wins  and  its  men  come  forward  and  ask  for 
their  reward,  the  reply  is,  'Nothin'  doin',  un- 
less you  can  answer  a  list  of  questions  about 
Egyptian  ma]m^mie^-and-4iow-4nany_vears  it 
will  take  for  a  bird  to  wear  out  a  mass  of  iron 
as  big  as  the  earth  by  steppin'  on  it  once  in  a 
century  ? ' 


^ 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
"  I  have  studied  politics  and  men  for  forty- 
five  years,  and  I  see  how  things  are  driftin'. 
Sad  indeed  is  the  change  that  has  come  over 
the  young  men,  even  in  my  district,  where  I 
try  to  keep  up  the  fire  of  pf^tT^^t^s^7]  Jiy  gpt- 
tin^  R  lot  of  johs  for  rny  constituents,  whether 
r^TTiTYiany  is  in  ormrL  The  boys  and  men 

don't  get  excited  any  more  when  they  see  a 

-  '^     '    ■    —  '  ^^^'-"^ 

TTnited  States  flf^,g  or  hear  the  *  j^tnr  Rpanp^lpd 

Banner.'  They  don't  care  no  more  for  fire- 
crackers on  the  Fourth  of  July.  And  why 
should  they  ?  What  is  there  in  it  for  them  ? 
They  know  that  no  niatter  how  hard  they 
wnrV  for  thpir  ronntry  in  a  campaip^n,  the 

jnK,S  will  gn  tn  f  p]  jnwg^uTJTnna  n  tell  about  the 

mummies  and  the  bird  steppin'  on  the  iron. 
Are  you  surprised  then  that  the  young  men 
of  the  country  are  beginnin'  to  look  coldly 
on  the  flag  and  don't  care  to  put  up  a  nickel 


fol"  fire-crackers  ? 


"  Say,  let  me  tell  of  one  case.  After  the  bat- 


CURSE   OF   CIVIL  SERVICE   REFORM 

tie  of  San  Juan  Hill,  the  Americans  found  a 
dead  man  with  a  light  complexion,  red  hair 
and  blue  eyes.  They  could  see  he  was  n't  a 
Spaniard,  although  he  had  on  a  Spanish  uni- 
form. Several  officers  looked  him  over,  and 
then  a  private  of  the  Seventy-first  Regiment 
saw  him  and  yelled,  *  Good  Lord,  that 's 
Flaherty.'  That  man  grew  up  in  my  district, 
and  he  was  once  the  most  patriotic  American 
boy  on  the  West  Side.  He  could  n't  see  a 
flag  without  yellin'  himself  hoarse. 

"  Now,  how  did  he  come  to  be  lying  dead 
with  a  Spanish  uniform  on  ?  I  found  out  all 
about  it,  and  I  '11  vouch  for  the  story.  Well, 
in  the  municipal  campaign  of  1897,  that 
young  man,  chockful  of  patriotism,  worked 
day  and  night  for  the  Tammany  ticket. 
Tammany  won,  and  the  young^miaiL  deter- 
mined  to  devdfe  his  life  tome  service  of  the 
city.  He  picEed^ouTa  place  that  would  suit 
him,  and  sent  in  his  application  to  the  head 

[27] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

of  department.  He  got  a  reply  that  he  must 
taL^-u^— f>ijdl  <^frvin^  fxarriinntion  tp  ^^t  the 
place.  He  did  n't  know  what  these  examina- 
tions were,  so  he  went,  all  light-hearted,  to 
the  Civil  Service  Board.  He  read  the  ques- 
tions about  the  mummies,  the  bird  on  the 
iron,  and  all  the  other  fool  questions  —  and 
he  left  that  office  an  enemy  of  the  country 
that  he  had  loved  so  well.  The  mummies 
and  the  bird  blasted  his  patriotism.  He  went 
to  Cuba,  enlisted  in  the  Spanish  army  at  the 
breakin'  out  of  the  war,  and  died  fightin'  his 
country. 

*'That  is  but  one  victim  of  the  infamous 
civil  service.  If  that  young  man  had  not  run 
up  against  the  civil  examination,  but  had 
been  allowed  to  serve  his  country  as  he 
wished,  he  would  be  in  a  good  office  to-day, 
drawin'  a  good  salary.  Ah,  how  many  young 
men  have  had  their  patriotism  blasted  in  the 
same  way! 

[28] 


CURSE  OF  CIVIL  SERVICE  REFORM 
"  Now,  what  is  goin'  to  happen  when  civil 
service  crushes  out  patriotism  ?  Only  one 
thing  can  happen  —  the  republic  will  go  to 
pieces.  Then  a  czar  or  a  sultan  will  turn  up, 
which  brings  me  to  the  fourthly  of  my  argu- 
ment; that  is,  there  will  be  h  —  to  pay.  And 
that  ain't  no  lie." 


REFORMERS    ONLY   MORNIN'    GLORIES 


V^OLLEGE  professors  and  philosophers 
who  go  up  in  a  balloon  to  think  are  always 
discussin'  the  question:  'Why  T^^fprPLAJ" 
ministrations  jj^er  Suceeed^Themaelyes ! ' 
The  reason  is  plain  to  anybody  who  has 
learned  the  a,  b,  c  of  politics. 

"  I  can't  tell  just  how  many  of  these  move- 
ments I  've  seen  started  in  New  York  during 
my  forty  years  in  politics,  but  I  can  tell  you 
how  many  have  lasted  more  than  a  few 
years  —  none.  There  have  been  reform  com- 
mittees of  fifty,  of  sixty,  of  seventy,  of  one 
hundred  and  all  sorts  of  numbers  that 
started  out  to  do  up  the  regular  political  or- 
ganizations.   They  were  mornin'  glories  — 


REFORMERS  ONLY  MORNIN*  GLORIES 
looked  lovely  in  the  mornin'  and  withered  up 
in  a  short  time,  while  the  regular  machines 
went  on  flourishin'  forever,  like  fine  old 
oaks.  Say,  that 's  the  first  poetry  I  ever 
worked  off.  Ain't  it  great  ? 

"  Just  look  back  a  few  years.  You  remem- 
ber the  People's  Municipal  League  that 
nominated  Frank  Scott  for  mayor  in  1890  ? 
Do  you  remember  the  reformers  that  got  up 
that  league.'^  Have  you  ever  heard  of  them 
since  ?  I  have  n't.  Scott  himself  survived  be- 
cause he  had  always  been  a  first-rate  politi- 
cian, but  you  'd  have  to  look  in  the  newspa- 
per almanacs  of  1891  to  find  out  who  made 
up  the  People's  Municipal  League.  Oh,  yes! 
I  remember  one  name  —  Ollie  Teall ;  dear, 
pretty  Ollie  and  his  big  dog.  They  're  about 
all  that 's  left  of  the  League. 

"Now  take  the  reform  movement  of  1894. 
A  lot  of  good  politicians  joined  in  that  — 
the  Republicans,  the  State  Democrats,  the 

[31] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
Stecklerites  and  the  O'Brienites,  and  they 
gave  us  a  Uckin',  but  the  real  reform  part  of 
the  affair,  the  Committee  of  Seventy  that 
started  the  thing  goin',  what 's  become  of 
those  reformers  ?  What 's  become  of  Charles 
Stewart  Smith  ?  Where  's  Bangs  ?  Do  you 
ever  hear  of  Cornell,  the  iron  man,  in  politics 
now?  Could  a  search  party  find  R.  W.  G. 
Welling  ?  Have  you  seen  the  name  of  Fulton 
McMahon  or  McMahon  Fulton  —  I  ain't 
sure  which  —  in  the  papers  lately  ?  Or  Pre- 
ble Tucker  ?  Or  —  but  it 's  no  use  to  go 
through  the  list  of  the  reformers  who  said 
they  sounded  in  the  death  knell  of  Tammany 
in  1894.  They  're  gone  for  good,  and  Tam- 
many 's  pretty  well,  thank  you.  They  did  the 
talkin'  and  posin',  and  the  politicians  in  the 
movement  got  all  the  plums.  It 's  always  the 
case. 

"The  Citizens'  Union  has  lasted  a  little 
bit  longer  than  the  reform  crowd  that  went 

[32] 


1 


REFORMERS  ONLY  MORNIN'  GLORIES 
before  them,  but  that 's  because  they  learned 
a  thing  or  two  from  us.  They  learned  how  to 
put  up  a  pretty  good  bluff  —  and  bluff 
counts  a  lot  in  politics.  With  only  a  few  thou- 
sand members,  they  had  the  nerve  to  run  the 
whole  Fusion  movement,  make  the  Republi- 
cans and  other  organizations  come  to  their 
headquarters  to  select  a  ticket  and  dictate 
what  every  candidate  must  do  or  not  do.  I 
love  nerve,  and  I  've  had  a  sort  of  respect  for 
the  Citizens'  Union  lately,  but  the  Union 
can't  last.  Its  people  have  n't  been  trained  to 
politics,  and  whenever  Tammany  calls  their 
bluff  they  lay  right  down.  You  '11  never  hear 
of  the  Union  again  after  a  year  or  two. 

"And,  by  the  way,  what 's  become  of  the 
good  government  clubs,  the  political  nurs- 
eries of  a  few  years  ago  ?  Do  you  ever  hear  of 
Good  Government  Club  D  and  P  and  Q  and 
Z  any  more  ?  What 's  become  of  the  infants 
who  were  to  grow  up  and  show  us  how  to 

[33] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
govern  the  city  ?  I  know  what 's  become  of 
the  nursery  that  was  started  in  my  district. 
You  can  find  pretty  much  the  whole  outfit 
over  in  my  headquarters,  Washington  Hall. 

"The  fact  is  that  a  reformer  can't  last  in 
politics.  He  can  make  a  show  for  a  while,  but 
he  always  comes  down  like  a  rocket.  Politics 
is  as  much  a  regular  business  as  the  grocery 
or  the  dry-goods  or  the  drug  business. 
You  've  got  to  be  trained  up  to  it  or  you  'rfe 
sure  to  fall.  Suppose  a  man  who  knew  noth- 
ing about  the  grocery  trade  suddenly  went 
into  the  business  and  tried  to  conduct  it  ac- 
cording to  his  own  ideas.  Would  n't  he  make 
a  mess  of  it  ?  He  might  make  a  splurge  for  a 
while,  as  long  as  his  money  lasted,  but  his 
store  would  soon  be  empty.  It 's  just  the 
same  with  a  reformer.  He  has  n't  been 
brought  up  in  the  difficult  business  of  poli- 
tics and  he  makes  a  mess  of  it  every  time. 

"  I  've  been  studyin'  the  political  game  for 

[34] 


REFORMERS  ONLY  MORNIN'  GLORIES 
forty-five  years,  and  I  don't  know  it  all  yet. 
I  'm  learnin'  somethin'  all  the  time.  How, 
then,  can  you  expect  what  they  call '  business 
men'  to  turn  into  politics  all  at  once  and 
make  a  success  of  it  ?  It  is  just  as  if  I  went 
up  to  Columbia  University  and  started  to 
teach  Greek.  They  usually  last  about  as  long 
in  politics  as  I  would  last  at  Columbia. 

"You  can't  begin  too  early  in  politics  if 
you  want  to  succeed  at  the  game.  I  began 
several  years  before  I  could  vote,  and  so  did 
every  successful  leader  in  Tammany  Hall.' 
When  I  was  twelve  years  old  I  made  myself 
useful  around  the  district  headquarters  and 
did  work  at  all  the  polls  on  election  day. 
Later  on,  I  hustled  about  gettin'  out  voters 
who  had  jags  on  or  who  were  too  lazy  to 
come  to  the  polls.  There  's  a  hundred  ways 
that  boys  can  help,  and  they  get  an  experi- 
ence that 's  the  first  real  step  in  statesman- 
ship. Show  me  a  boy  that  hustles  for  the  or- 

[  35  ] 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

ganization  on  election  day,  and  I  '11  show 
you  a  comin'  statesman. 

"That 's  the  a  b  c  of  politics.  It  ain't  easy 
work  to  get  up  to  y  and  z.  You  have  to  give 
nearly  all  your  time  and  attention  to  it.  Of 
course,  you  may  have  some  business  or  occu- 
pation on  the  side,  but  the  great  business  of 
your  life  must  be  politics  if  you  want  to  suc- 
ceed in  it.  A  few  years  ago  Tammany  tried  to 
mix  politics  and  business  in  equal  quantities, 
by  havin'  two  leaders  for  each  district,  a 
politician  and  a  business  man.  They 
would  n't  mix.  They  were  like  oil  and  water. 
The  politician  looked  after  the  politics  of  his 
district;  the  business  man  looked  after  his 
grocery  store  or  his  milk  route,  and  when- 
ever he  appeared  at  an  executive  meeting,  it 
was  only  to  make  trouble.  The  whole  scheme 
turned  out  to  be  a  farce  and  was  abandoned 
mighty  quick. 

"Do  you  understand  now,  why  it  is  that  a 

[36] 


REFORMERS  ONLY  MORNIN'  GLORIES  . 
reformer  goes  down  and  out  in  the  first  or 
second  round,  while  a  poHtieian  answers  to 
the  gong  every  time  ?  It  is  because  the  one 
has  gone  into  the  fight  without  trainin', 
while  the  other  trains  all  the  time  and  knows 
every  fine  point  of  the  game." 


[37] 


313731 


NEW     YORK     CITY     IS     PIE     FOR 
THE     HAYSEEDS 

1  HIS  city  is  ruled  entirely  by  the  hayseed 
legislators  at  Albany.  I  've  never  known  an 
up-State  Republican  who  did  n't  want  to 
run  things  here,  and  I  've  met  many  thou- 
sands of  them  in  my  long  service  in  the  Legis- 
lature. The  hayseeds  think  we  are  like  the 
Indians  to  the  National  Government  —  that 
is,  sort  of  wards  of  the  State,  who  don't  know 
how  to  look  after  ourselves  and  have  to  be 
taken  care  of  by  the  Republicans  of  St.  Law- 
rence, Ontario,  and  other  backwoods  coun- 
ties. Why  should  anybody  be  surprised  be- 
cause ex- Governor  Odell  comes  down  here 
to  direct  the  Republican  machine.^  New- 
burg  ain't  big  enough  for  him.     He,  like  all 

[38] 


PIE   FOR  THE   HAYSEEDb 

the  other  up-State  RepubUcans,  wantsht  to 
hold  of  New  York  City.  New  Yort-o 
their  pie. 

"  Say,  you  hear  a  lot  about  the  downtrod- 
den people  of  Ireland  and  the  Russian  peas- 
ants and  the  sufferin'  Boers.  Now,  let  me  tell 
you  that  they  have  more  real  freedom  and 
home  rule  than  the  people  of  this  grand  and 
imperial  city.  In  England,  for  example,  they 
make  a  pretense  of  givin'  the  Irish  some  self- 
government.  In  this  State  the  Republi- 
can government  makes  no  pretense  at  all. 
It  says  right  out  in  the  open:  'New  York 
City  is  a  nice  big  fat  Goose.  Come  along 
with  your  carvin'  knives  and  have  a  slice.' 
They  don't  pretend  to  ask  the  Goose's 
consent. 

"  We  don't  own  our  streets  or  our  docks  or 
our  water  front  or  anything  else.  The  Repub- 
lican Legislature .  and  Governor  run  the 
whole  shootin'-match.  We  've  got  to  eat  and 

[  39  ] 


/ 

WKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
what  they  tell  us  to  eat  and  drink,  and 
.v^e  got  to  choose  our  time  for  eatin'  and 
drinkin'  to  suit  them.  If  they  don't  feel  like 
takin'  a  glass  of  beer  on  Sunday,  we  must  ab- 
stain. If  they  have  not  got  any  amusements 
up  in  their  backwoods,  we  must  n't  have 
none.  We  've  got  to  regulate  our  whole  lives 
to  suit  them.  And  then  we  have  to  pay  their 
taxes  to  boot. 

^  '*  Did  you  ever  go  up  to  Albany  from  this 
city  with  a  delegation  that  wanted  anything 
from  the  Legislature  ?  No  ?  Well,  don't.  The 
hayseeds  who  run  all  the  committees  will 
look  at  you  as  if  you  were  a  child  that  did  n't 
know  what  it  wanted,  and  will  tell  you  in  so 
many  words  to  go  home  and  be  good  and  the 
Legislature  will  give  you  whatever  it  thinks 
is  good  for  you.  They  put  on  a  sort  of  pa- 
tronizing air,  as  much  as  to  say,  *  These  chil- 
dren are  an  awful  lot  of  trouble.  They  're 
wantin'  candy  all  the  time,  and  they  know 

[40] 


% 


§ 


PIE  FOR  THE  HAYSEEDS  . 
that  it  will  make  them  sick.  They  ought  to 
thank  goodness  that  they  have  us  to  take 
care  of  them.'  And  if  you  try  to  argue  with 
them,  they  '11  smile  in  a  pityin'  sort  of  way  as 
if  they  were  humorin'  a  spoiled  child. 

**But  just  let  a  Republican  farmer  from 
Chemung  or  Wayne  or  Tioga  turn  up  at  the 
Capital.  The  Republican  Legislature  will 
make  a  rush  for  him  and  ask  him  what  he 
wants  and  tell  him  if  he  does  n't  see  what  he 
wants  to  ask  for  it.  If  he  says  his  taxes  are  too 
high,  they  reply  to  him :  'All  right,  old  man, 
don't  let  that  worry  you.  How  much  do  you 
want  us  to  take  off  ? ' 

"  *  I  guess  about  fifty  per  cent  will  about  do 
for  the  present,'  says  the  man,  *  Can  you  fix 
me  up  .^ ' 

"'Sure,'  the  Legislature  agrees.  *Give  us 
somethin'  harder,  don't  be  bashful.  We  '11 
take  off  sixty  per  cent  if  you  wish.  That 's 
what  we  're  here  for.' 

[41] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
"Then  the  Legislature  goes  and  passes  a 
law  increasin'  the  liquor  tax  or  some  other 
tax  in  New  York  City,  takes  a  half  of  the  pro- 
ceeds for  the  State  Treasury  and  cuts  down 
the  farmers' taxes  to  suit.  It 's  as  easy  as  rollin' 
oif  a  log  —  when  you  've  got  a  good  workin' 
majority  and  no  conscience  to  speak  of. 

"Let  me  give  you  another  example.  It 
makes  me  hot  under  the  collar  to  tell  about 
this.  Last  year  some  hayseeds  along  the 
Hudson  River,  mostly  in  Odell's  neighbor- 
hood, got  dissatisfied  with  the  docks  where 
they  landed  their  vegetables,  brickbats,  and 
other  things  they  produce  in  the  river  coun- 
ties. They  got  together  and  said :  'Let 's  take 
a  trip  down  to  New  York  and  pick  out  the 
finest  dock  we  can  find.  Odell  and  the  Legis- 
lature will  do  the  rest.'  They  did  come  down 
here,  and  what  do  you  think  they  hit  on  ? 
The  finest  dock  in  my  district.  Invaded 
George  W.  Plunkitt's  district  without  sayin' 

[42] 


PIE  FOR  THE   HAYSEEDS 
as  much  as  'by  your  leave.'  Then  they  called 
on  Odell  to  put  through  a  bill  givin'  them 
this  dock,  and  he  did. 

*' When  the  bill  came  before  Mayor  Low  I 
made  the  greatest  speech  of  my  life.  I  point- 
ed out  how  the  Legislature  could  give  the 
whole  water  front  to  the  hayseeds  over  the 
head  of  the  Dock  Commissioner  in  the  same 
way,  and  warned  the  Mayor  that  nations 
had  rebelled  against  their  governments  for 
less.  But  it  was  no  go.  Odell  and  Low  were 
pards  and  —  well,  my  dock  was  stolen. 

"You  heard  a  lot  in  the  State  campaign 
about  OdelFs  great  work  in  reducin'  the 
State  tax  to  almost  nothin',  and  you  '11  hear 
a  lot  more  about  it  in  the  campaign  next 
year.  How  did  he  do  it  ?  By  cuttin'  down  the 
expenses  of  the  State  Government  ?  Oh,  no ! 
The  expenses  went  up.  He  simply  performed 
the  old  Republican  act  of  milkin'  New  York 
City.  The  only  difference  was  that  he  nearly 

[43] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
milked  the  city  dry.  He  not  only  ran  up  the 
liquor  tax,  but  put  all  sorts  of  taxes  on  cor- 
porations, banks,  insurance  companies,  and 
everything  in  sight  that  could  be  made  to 
give  up.  Of  course,  nearly  the  whole  tax  fell 
on  the  city.  Then  Odell  went  through  the 
country  districts  and  said :  *  See  what  I  have 
done  for  you.  You  ain't  got  any  more  taxes  to 
pay  the  State.  Ain't  I  a  fine  feller.^' 

*'Once  a  farmer  in  Orange  County  asked 
him:  *How  did  you  do  it,  Ben  ?' 

'''Dead  easy,"  he  answered.  'Whenever  I 
want  any  money  for  the  State  Treasury,  I 
know  where  to  get  it,'  and  he  pointed  toward 
New  York  City. 

"And  then  all  the  Republican  tinkerin' 
with  New  York  City's  charter.  Nobody  cah 
keep  up  with  it.  When  a  Republican  mayor 
is  in,  they  give  him  all  sorts  of  power.  If  a 
Tammany  mayor  is  elected  next  fall  I 
would  n't  be  surprised  if  they  changed  the 

[44] 


PIE  FOR  THE  HAYSEEDS 
whole  business  and  arranged  it  so  that  every 
city  department  should  have  four  heads,  two 
of  them  Republicans.  If  we  made  a  kick, 
they  would  say :  '  You  don't  know  what 's 
good  for  you.  Leave  it  to  us.  It 's  our  bus- 


?  99 

mess. 


[45] 


TO    HOLD    YOUR    DISTRICT STUDY    HUMAN 

NATURE  AND   ACT  ACCORDIN' 


1  HERE  'S  only  one  way  to  hold  a  dis- 
trict; you  must  study  human  nature  and  act 
accordin'.  You  can't  study  human  nature  in 
books.  Books  is  a  hindrance  more  than  any- 
thing else.  If  you  have  been  to  college,  so 
much  the  worse  for  you.  You  '11  have  to  un- 
learn all  you  learned  before  you  can  get  right 
down  to  human  nature,  and  unlearnin'  takes 
a  lot  of  time.  Some  men  can  never  forget 
what  they  learned  at  college.  Such  men  may 
get  to  be  district  leaders  by  a  fluke,  but  they 
never  last. 

*'To  learn  real  human  nature  you  have  to 
go  among  the  people,  see  them  and  be  seen. 
I  know  every  man,  woman,  and  child  in  the 

[46] 


TO  HOLD  YOUR  DISTRICT 
Fifteenth  District,  except  them  that 's  been 
born  this  summer  —  and  I  know  some  of 
them,  too.  I  know  what  they  hke  and  what 
they  don't  hke,  what  they  are  strong  at  and 
what  they  are  weak  in,  and  I  reach  them  by 
approachin'  at  the  right  side. 

"For  instance,  here  's  how  I  gather  in  the 
young  men.  I  hear  of  a  young  feller  that 's 
proud  of  his  voice,  thinks  that  he  can  sing 
fine.  I  ask  him  to  come  around  to  Washing- 
ton Hall  and  join  our  Glee  Club.  He  comes 
and  sings,  and  he  's  a  follower  of  Plunkitt 
for  life.  Another  young  feller  gains  a  reputa- 
tion as  a  base-ball  player  in  a  vacant  lot.  I 
bring  him  into  our  base-ball  club.  That  fixes 
him.  You  '11  find  him  workin'  for  my  ticket 
at  the  polls  next  election  day.  Then  there  's 
the  feller  that  likes  rowin'  on  the  river,  the 
young  feller  that  makes  a  name  as  a  waltzer 
on  his  block,  the  young  feller  that 's  handy 
with  his  dukes  —  I  rope  them  all  in  by  givin* 

[47] 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
them  opportunities  to  show  themselves  off.  I 
don't  trouble  them  with  political  arguments. 
I  just  study  human  nature  and  act  accordin'. 

"But  you  may  say  this  game  won't  work 
with  the  high-toned  fellers,  the  fellers  that  go 
through  college  and  then  join  the  Citizens' 
Union.  Of  course  it  would  n't  work.  I  have  a 
special  treatment  for  them.  I  ain't  like  the 
patent  medicine  man  that  gives  the  same 
medicine  for  all  diseases.  The  Citizens' 
Union  kind  of  a  young  man!  I  love  him! 
He  's  the  daintiest  morsel  of  the  lot,  and  he 
don't  often  escape  me. 

"Before  telling  you  how  I  catch  him,  let 
me  mention  that  before  the  election  last  year, 
the  Citizens'  Union  said  they  had  four  hun- 
dred or  five  hundred  enrolled  voters  in  my 
district.  They  had  a  lovely  headquarters, 
too,  beautiful  roll-top  desks  and  the  cutest 
rugs  in  the  world.  If  I  was  accused  of  havin' 
contributed  to  fix  up  the  nest  for  them,  I 

[48] 


TO  HOLD  YOUR  DISTRICT 
would  n't  deny  it  under  oath.  What  do  I 
mean  by  that  ?  Never  mind.  You  can  guess 
from  the  sequel,  if  you  're  sharp. 

"Well,  election  day  came.  The  Citizens' 
Union's  candidate  for  Senator,  who  ran 
against  me,  just  polled  five  votes  in  the  dis- 
trict, while  I  polled  something  more  than 
14,000  votes.  What  became  of  the  400  or 
500  Citizens'  Union  enrolled  voters  in  my 
district  ?  Some  people  guessed  that  many  of 
them  were  good  Plunkitt  men  all  along  and 
worked  with  the  Cits  just  to  bring  them  into 
the  Plunkitt  camp  by  election  day.  You  can 
guess  that  way,  too,  if  you  want  to.  I  never 
contradict  stories  about  me,  especially  in  hot 
weather.  I  just  call  your  attention  to  the  fact 
that  on  last  election  day  395  Citizens'  Union 
enrolled  voters  in  my  district  were  missin' 
and  unaccounted  for. 

"I  tell  you  frankly,  though,  how  I  have 
captured    some    of    the    Citizens'    Union's 

[49] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

young  men.  I  have  a  plan  that  never  fails.  I 
watch  the  City  Record  to  see  when  there  's 
civil  service  examinations  for  good  things. 
Then  I  take  my  young  Cit  in  hand,  tell  him 
all  about  the  good  thing  and  get  him  worked 
up  till  he  goes  and  takes  an  examination.  I 
don't  bother  about  him  any  more.  It 's  a 
cinch  that  he  comes  back  to  me  in  a  few  days 
and  asks  to  join  Tammany  Hall.  Come  over 
to  Washington  Hall  some  night  and  I  '11 
show  you  a  list  of  names  on  our  rolls  marked 
*C.  S. '  which  means,  'bucked  up  against 
civil  service.' 

"As  to  the  older  voters,  1  reach  them,  too. 
No,  I  don't  send  them  campaign  literature. 
That  's  rot.  People  can  get  all  the  political 
stuff  they  want  to  read  —  and  a  good  deal 
more,  too  —  in  the  papers.  Who  reads 
speeches,  nowadays,  anyhow  ?  It  's  bad 
enough  to  listen  to  them.  You  ain't  goin'  to 
gain  any  votes  by  stuffin'  the  letter  boxes 

[50] 


TO  HOLD  YOUR  DISTRICT 
with  campaign  documents.  Like  as  not 
you  '11  lose  votes,  for  there  's  nothin'  a  man 
hates  more  than  to  hear  the  letter-carrier 
ring  his  bell  and  go  to  the  letter-box  expect- 
in'  to  find  a  letter  he  was  lookin'  for,  and  find 
only  a  lot  of  printed  politics.  I  met  a  man  this 
very  mornin'  who  told  me  he  voted  ^.he  Dem- 
ocratic State  ticket  last  year  just  because  the 
Republicans  kept  crammin'  h^s  letter-box 
with  campaign  documents. 

".BOiaL  tells  in  holdin'  your  grip  on  your 
district  is  to  go  right  down  among  the  poor 
families  and  help  them  in  the  different  ways 
they  need,  help.  I  've  got  a  regular  system  for 
this.  If  there  's  a  fire  in  Ninth,  Tenth,  or 
Eleventh  Avenue,  for  example,  any  hour  of 
the  day  or  night,  I  'm  usually  there  with 
some  of  my  election  district  captains  as  soon 
as  the  fire-engines.  If  a  family  is  burned  out 
I  don't  ask  whether  they  are  Republicans  or 
Democrats,  and  I  don't  refer  them  to  the 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
Charity  Organization  Society,  which  would 
investigate  their  case  in  a  month  or  two  and 
decide  they  were  worthy  of  help  about  the 
time  they  are  dead  from  starvation.  I  just  get 
quarters  for  them,  buy  clothes  for  them  if 
their  clothes  were  burned  up,  and  fix  them 
up  till  taey  get  things  runnin'  again.  It 's 
philanthropy,  but  it 's  politics,  too  —  mighty 
good  politici^ .  Who  can  tell  how  many  votes 
one  of  these  ires  bring  me  ?  The  poor  are 
the  most  grateful  people  in  the  world,  and,  let 
me  tell  you,  th^  have  more  friends  in  their 
neighborhoods  than  the  rich  have  in  theirs. 
"  If  there  's  a  family  in  my  district  in  want 
I  know  it  before  the  charitable  societies  do, 
and  me  and  my  men  are  first  on  the  ground. 
I  have  a  special  corps  to  look  up  such  cases. 
The  consequence  is  that  the  poor  look  up  to 
George  W.  Plunkitt  as  a  father,  come  to  him 
in  trouble  —  and  don't  forget  him  on  elec- 
tion  day. 

[  52  ] 


TO  HOLD  YOUR  DISTRICT 
"Another  thing,  I  can  always  get  a  job  for 
a  deservin'  man.  I  make  it  a  point  to  keep  on 
the  track  of  jobs,  and  it  seldom  happens  that 
I  don't  have  a  few  up  my  sleeve  ready  for 
use.  I  know  every  big  employer  in  the  dis- 
trict and  in  the  whole  city,  for  that  matter, 
and  they  ain't  in  the  habit  of  sayin'  no  to  me 
when  I  ask  them  for  a  job. 

"And  the  children  —  the  little  roses  of  the 
district !  Do  I  forget  them  ?  Oh,  no !  They 
know  me,  every  one  of  them,  and  they  know 
that  a  sight  of  Uncle  George  and  candy 
means  the  same  thing.  Some  of  them  are  the 
best  kind  of  vote-getters.  I  '11  tell  you  a  case. 
Last  year  a  little  Eleventh  Avenue  rosebud 
whose  father  is  a  Republican,  caught  hold  of 
his  whiskers  on  election  day  and  said  she 
would  n't  let  go  till  he  'd  promise  to  vote  for 
me.  And  she  did  n't. 


[53] 


ON  "the  shame  of  the  cities'' 


1  'VE  been  readin'  a  book  by  Lincoln 
Steffens  on* The  Shame  of  the  Cities.'  Steff- 
ens  means  well  but,  like  all  reformers,  he  don't 
know  how  to  make  distinctions.  He  can't  see 
no  difference  between  honest  graft  and  dis- 
honest graft  and,  consequent,  he  gets  things 
all  mixed  up.  There  's  the  biggest  kind  of  a 
difference  between  political  looters  and  poli- 
ticians who  make  a  fortune  out  of  politics  by 
keepin'  their  eyes  wide  open.  The  looter  goes^ 
in  for  himself  alone  without  considerin'  his 
organization  or  his  city.  The  politician  looks 
after  his  own  interests,  the  organization's  in- 
terests, and  the  city's  interests  all  at  the  same 
time.  See  the  distinction  ?  For  instance,  I 

[541 


"THE  SHAME  OF  THE  CITIES" 
ain't  no  looter.  The  looter  hogs  it.  I  never 
hogged.  I  made  my  pile  in  politics,  but,  at 
the  same  time,  I  served  the  organization  and 
got  more  big  improvements  for  New  York 
City  than  any  other  livin'  man.  And  I  never 
monkeyed  with  the  penal  code. 

"The  difference  between  a  looter  and  a 
practical  politician  is  the  difference  between 
the  Philadelphia  Republican  gang  and  Tam- 
many Hall.  Steffens  seems  to  think  they  're 
both  about  the  same;  but  he  's  all  wrong. 
The  Philadelphia  crowd  runs  up  against  the 
penal  code.  Tammany  don't.  The  Philadel- 
phians  ain't  satisfied  with  robbin'  the  bank 
of  all  its  gold  and  paper  money.  They  stay  to 
pick  up  the  nickels  and  pennies  and  the  cop 
comes  and  nabs  them.  Tammany  ain't  no 
such  fool.  Why,  I  remember,  about  fifteen  or 
twenty  years  ago,  a  Republican  superin- 
tendent of  the  Philadelphia  almshouse  stole 
the  zinc  roof  off  the  buildin'  and  sold  it  for 

[55] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
junk.  That  was  carryin'  things  to  excess. 
There  's  a  hmit  to  everything,  and  the  Phila- 
delphia Republicans  go  beyond  the  limit.  It 
seems  like  they  can't  be  cool  and  moderate 
like  real  politicians.  It  ain't  fair,  therefore, 
to  class  Tammany  men  with  the  Philadel- 
phia gang.  Any  man  who  undertakes  to 
write  political  books  should  never  for  a  mo- 
ment lose  sight  of  the  distinction  between 
honest  graft  and  dishonest  graft,  which  I  ex- 
plained in  full  in  another  talk.  If  he  puts  all 
kinds  of  graft  on  the  same  level,  he  '11  make 
the  fatal  mistake  that  Steffens  made  and 
spoil  his  book. 

"  A  big  city  like  New  York  or  Philadelphia 
or  Chicago  might  be  compared  to  a  sort  of 
Garden  of  Eden,  from  a  political  point  of 
view.  It 's  an  orchard  full  of  beautiful  ap- 
ple-trees. One  of  them  has  got  a  big  sign  on 
it,  marked:  'Penal  Code  Tree  —  Poison.' 
The  other  trees  have  lots  of  apples  on  them 

[56] 


"THE   SHAME   OF  THE   CITIES" 

for  all.  Yet,  the  fools  go  to  the  Penal  Code 
Tree.  Why  ?  For  the  reason,  I  guess,  that  a 
cranky  child  refuses  to  eat  good  food  and 
chews  up  a  box  of  matches  with  relish.  I 
never  had  any  temptation  to  touch  the  Penal 
Code  Tree.  The  other  apples  are  good 
enough  for  me,  and  O  Lord!  how  many  of 
them  there  are  in  a  big  city! 

"Steffens  made  one  good  point  in  his 
book.  He  said  he  found  that  Philadelphia, 
ruled  almost  entirely  by  Americans,  was 
more  corrupt  than  New  York,  where  the 
Irish  do  almost  all  the  governin'.  I  could 
have  told  him  that  before  he  did  any  investi- 
gatin'  if  he  had  come  to  me.  The  Irish  was 
born  to  rule,  and  they  're  the  honestest  peo- 
ple in  the  world.  Show  me  the  Irishman  who 
would  steal  a  roof  off  an  almshouse !  He  don't 
exist.  Of  course,  if  an  Irishman  had  the  polit- 
ical pull  and  the  roof  was  much  worn,  he 
might  get  the  city  authorities  to  put  on  a  new 

[57] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
one  and  get  the  contract  for  it  himself,  and 
buy  the  old  roof  at  a  bargain  —  but  that  's 
honest  graft.  It  's  goin'  about  the  thing  like  a 
gentleman  —  and  there  's  more  money  in  it 
than  in  tearin'  down  an  old  roof  and  cartin' 
it  to  the  junkman's  —  more  money  and  no 
penal  code. 

"One  reason  why  the  Irishman  is  more 
honest  in  politics  than  many  Sons  of  the 
Revolution  is  that  he  is  grateful  to  the  coun- 
try and  the  city  that  gave  him  protection  and 
prosperity  when  he  was  driven  by  oppres- 
sion from  the  Emerald  Isle.  Say,  that  sen- 
tence is  fine,  ain't  it  ?  I  'm  goin'  to  get  some 
literary  feller  to  work  it  over  into  poetry  for 
next  St.  Patrick's  Day  dinner. 

"Yes,  the  Irishman  is  grateful.  His  one 
thought  is  to  serve  the  city  which  gave  him  a 
home.  He  has  this  thought  even  before  he 
lands  in  New  York,  for  his  friends  here  often 
have  a  good  place  in  one  of  the  city  depart- 

[58] 


'THE  SHAME  OF  THE  CITIES" 
ments  picked  out  for  him  while  he  is  still  in 
the  old  country.  Is  it  any  wonder  that  he  has 
a  tender  spot  in  his  heart  for  old  New  York 
when  he  is  on  its  salary  list  the  mornin'  after 
he  lands  ? 

"  Now,  a  few  words  on  the  general  subject 
of  the  so-called  shame  of  cities.  I  don't  be- 
lieve that  the  government  of  our  cities  is  any 
worse,  in  proportion  to  opportunities,  than  it 
was  fifty  years  ago.  I  '11  explain  what  I  mean 
by  'in  proportion  to  opportunities.'  A  half 
a  century  ago,  our  cities  were  small  and  poor. 
There  was  n't  many  temptations  lyin' 
around  for  politicians.  There  was  hardly 
anything  to  steal,  and  hardly  any  opportu- 
nities for  even  honest  graft.  A  city  could 
count  its  money  every  night  before  goin'  to 
bed,  and  if  three  cents  was  missin',  all  the 
fire-bells  would  be  rung.  What  credit  was 
there  in  bein'  honest  under  them  circum- 
stances ?  It  makes  me  tired  to  hear  of  old 

[59] 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

codgers  back  in  the  thirties  or  forties  boast- 
in'  that  they  retired  from  pohtics  without  a 
dollar  except  what  they  earned  in  their  pro- 
fession or  business.  If  they  lived  to-day,  with 
all  the  existin'  opportunities,  they  would  be 
just  the  same  as  twentieth  century  politi- 
cians. There  ain't  any  more  honest  people  in 
the  world  just  now  than  the  convicts  in  Sing 
Sing.  Not  one  of  them  steals  anything.  Why  ? 
Because  they  can't.  See  the  application  ? 

"Understand,  I  ain't  defendin'  politicians 
of  to-day  who  steal.  The  politician  who 
steals  is  worse  than  a  thief.  He  is  a  fool. 
With  the  grand  opportunities  all  around  for 
the  man  with  a  political  pull,  there  's  no  ex- 
cuse for  stealin'  a  cent.  The  point  I  want  to 
make  is  that  if  there  is  some  stealin'  in  poli- 
tics, it  don't  mean  that  the  politicians  of  1905 
are,  as  a  class,  worse  than  them  of  1835.  It 
just  means  that  the  old-timers  had  nothin'  to 
steal,  while  the  politicians  now  are  surround- 

[60] 


"THE  SHAME  OF  THE  CITIES" 

ed  by  all  kinds  of  temptations  and  some  of 
them  naturally  —  the  fool  ones  —  buck  up 
against  the  penal  code." 


[61] 


INGRATITUDE   IN   POLITICS 

1  HERE  'S  no  crime  so  mean  as  ingrati- 
tude in  politics,  but  every  great  statesman 
from  the  beginnin'  of  the  world  has  been  up 
against  it.  Csesar  had  his  Brutus;  that  king 
of  Shakspere's  —  Leary,  I  think  you  call 
him  —  had  his  own  daughters  go  back  on 
him;  Piatt  had  his  Odell,  and  I  've  got  my 
*The'  McManus.  It 's  a  real  proof  that  a 
man  is  great  when  he  meets  with  political  in- 
gratitude. Great  men  have  a  tender,  trustin' 
nature.  So  have  I  —  outside  of  the  contract- 
in'  and  real  estate  business.  In  politics  I 
have  trusted  men  who  have  told  me  they 
were  my  friends,  and  if  traitors  have  turned 
up  in  my  camp  —  well,  I  only  had  the  same 

[62] 


INGRATITUDE  IN  POLITICS 
experience  as  Caesar,  Leary,  and  the  others. 
About  my  Brutus.  McManus,  you  know, 
has  seven  brothers  and  they  call  him  'The' 
because  he  is  the  boss  of  the  lot,  and  to  dis- 
tinguish him  from  all  other  McManuses. 
For  several  years  he  was  a  political  bush- 
whacker. In  campaigns  he  was  sometimes  on 
the  fence,  sometimes  on  both  sides  of  the 
fence,  and  sometimes  under  the  fence.  No- 
body knew  where  to  find  him  at  any  par- 
ticular time,  and  nobody  trusted  him  —  that 
is,  nobody  but  me.  I  thought  there  was  some 
good  in  him  after  all  and  that,  if  I  took  him 
in  hand,  I  could  make  a  man  of  him  yet. 

"  I  did  take  him  in  hand,  a  few  years  ago. 
My  friends  told  me  it  would  be  the  Brutus- 
Leary  business  all  over  again,  but  I  did  n't 
believe  them.  I  put  my  trust  in  *The.'  I  nom- 
inated him  for  the  Assembly,  and  he  was 
elected.  A  year  afterwards,  when  I  was  run- 
nin'  for  re-election  as  Senator,  I  nominated 

[63] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
him  for  the  Assembly  again  on  the  ticket 
with  me.  What  do  you  think  happened  ?  We 
both  carried  the  Fifteenth  Assembly  Dis- 
trict, but  he  ran  away  ahead  of  me. 
Just  think!  Ahead  of  me  in  my  own 
district!  I  was  just  dazed.  When  I  began 
to  recover,  my  election  district  captains 
came  to  me  and  said  that  McManus  had 
sold  me  out  with  the  idea  of  knockin'  me 
out  of  the  Senatorship,  and  then  tryin'  to 
capture  the  leadership  of  the  district.  I 
could  n't  believe  it.  My  trustin'  nature 
could  n't  imagine  such  treachery. 

"I  sent  for  McManus  and  said,  with  my 
voice  tremblin'  with  emotions:  'They  say 
you  have  done  me  dirt,  *The.'  It  can't  be 
true.  Tell  me  it  ain't  true.' 

"*The'  almost  wept  as  he  said  he  was 
innocent. 

" '  Never  have  I  done  you  dirt,  George,'  he 
declared.  *  Wicked  traitors  have  tried  to  do 

[64] 


INGRATITUDE  IN  POLITICS 
you.  I  don't  know  just  who  they  are  yet,  but 
I  'm  on  their  trail,  and  I  '11  find  them  or  ab- 
jure the  name  of  *The'   McManus.   I  'm 
goin'  out  right  now  to  find  them.' 

"Well,  *The'  kept  his  word  as  far  as  goin' 
out  and  findin'  the  traitors  was  concerned. 
He  found  them  all  right  —  and  put  himself 
at  their  head.  Oh,  no !  He  did  n't  have  to  go 
far  to  look  for  them.  He  's  got  them  gathered 
in  his  club-rooms  now,  and  he  's  doin'  his 
best  to  take  the  leadership  from  the  man  that 
made  him.  So  you  see  that  Csesar  and  Leary 
and  me  's  in  the  same  boat,  only  I  '11  come 
out  on  top  while  Caesar  and  Leary  went 
under. 

"Now  let  me  tell  you  that  the  ingrate  in 
politics  never  flourishes  long.  I  can  give  you 
lots  of  examples.  Look  at  the  men  who  done 
up  Roscoe  Conkling  when  he  resigned  from 
the  United  States  Senate  and  went  to  Albany 
to  ask  for  a  re-election !  What 's  become  of 

[65] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
them  ?  Passed  from  view  like  a  movin'  pic- 
ture. Who  took  Conkhng's  place  in  the  Sen- 
ate ?  Twenty  dollars  even  that  you  can't  re- 
member his  name  without  looking  in  the  al- 
manac. And  poor  old  Piatt!  He  's  down  and 
out  now  and  Odell  is  in  the  saddle,  but  that 
don't  mean  that  he  '11  always  be  in  the  sad- 
dle. His  enemies  are  workin'  hard  all  the 
time  to  do  him,  and  I  would  n't  be  a  bit  sur- 
prised if  he  went  out  before  the  next  State 
campaign. 

"The  politicians  who  make  a  lastin'  suc- 
cess in  politics  are  the  men  who  are  always 
loyal  to  their  friends  —  even  up  to  the  gate 
of  State  prison,  if  necessary;  men  who  keep 
their  promises  and  never  lie.  Richard  Croker 
used  to  say  that  tellin'  the  truth  and  stickin' 
to  his  friends  was  the  political  leader's  stock 
in  trade.  Nobody  ever  said  anything  truer, 
and  nobody  lived  up  to  it  better  than  Croker. 
That  is  why  he  remained  leader  of  Tam- 

[66] 


\ 


INGRATITUDE   IN   POLITICS 

many  Hall  as  long  as  he  wanted  to.  Every 
man  in  the  organization  trusted  him.  Some- 
times he  made  mistakes  that  hurt  in  cam- 
paigns, but  they  were  always  on  the  side  of 
servin'  his  friends. 

**  It 's  the  same  with  Charles  F.  Murphy. 
He  has  always  stood  by  his  friends  even 
when  it  looked  like  he  would  be  downed  for 
doin'  so.  Remember  how  he  stuck  to  Mc- 
Clellan  in  1903  when  all  the  Brooklyn  lead- 
ers were  against  him,  and  it  seemed  as  if 
Tammany  was  in  for  a  grand  smash-up! 
It 's  men  like  Croker  and  Murphy  that  stay 
leaders  as  long  as  they  live;  not  men  like 
Brutus  and  McManus. 

"Now  I  want  to  tell  you  why  political 
traitors,  in  New  York  City  especially,  are 
punished  quick.  It 's  because  the  Irish  are  in 
a  majority.  The  Irish,  above  all  people  in  the 
world,  hates  a  traitor.  You  can't  hold  them 
back  when  a  traitor  of  any  kind  is  in  sight 

[67] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

\  and,  rememberin'  old  Ireland,  they  take  par- 
ticular delight  in  doin'  up  a  political  traitor. 
Most  of  the  voters  in  my  district  are  Irish  or 
of  Irish  descent ;  they  ' ve  spotted  '  The '  Mc- 
Manus,  and  when  they  get  a  chance  at  him 
at  the  polls  next  time,  they  won't  do  a  thing 
to  him. 

"The  question  has  been  asked:  is  a  poli- 
tician ever  justified  in  goin'  back  on  his  dis- 
trict leader?  I  answer:  'No;  as  long  as  the 
leader  hustles  around  and  gets  all  the  jobs 
possible  for  his  constituents.'  When  the  vot- 
ers elect  a  man  leader,  they  make  a  sort  of  a 
contract  with  him.  They  say,  although  it 
ain't  written  out :  '  We  've  put  you  here  to 
look  out  for  our  interests.  You  want  to  see 
that  this  district  gets  all  the  jobs  that 's  com- 
in'  to  it.  Be  faithful  to  us,  and  we  '11  be  faith- 
ful to  you.' 

*'The  district  leader  promises  and  that 
makes  a  solemn  contract.  If  he  lives  up  to  it; 

[68]         ■ 


INGRATITUDE  IN  POLITICS 
spends  most  of  his  time  chasin'  after  places 
in  the  departments,  picks  up  jobs  from  rail- 
roads and  contractors  for  his  followers,  and 
shows  himself  in  all  ways  a  true  statesman, 
then  his  followers  are  bound  in  honor  to  up- 
hold him,  just  as  they  're  bound  to  uphold 
the  Constitution  of  the  United  States.  But  if 
he  only  looks  after  his  own  interests  or  shows 
no  talent  for  scenting  out  jobs  or  ain't  got  the 
nerve  to  demand  and  get  his  share  of  the 
good  things  that  are  goin',  his  followers  may 
be  absolved  from  their  allegiance  and  they 
may  up  and  swat  him  without  bein'  put 
down  as  political  ingrates." 


[69] 


RECIPROCITY   IN    PATRONAGE 

'  'Whenever  Tammany  is  whipped  at 
the  polls,  the  people  set  to  predietin'  that  the 
organization  is  goin'  to  smash.  They  say  we 
can't  get  along  without  the  offices  and  that 
the  district  leaders  are  goin'  to  desert  whole- 
sale. That  was  what  was  said  after  the  throw- 
downs  in  1894  and  1901.  But  it  didn't 
happen,  did  it  ?  Not  one  big  Tammany  man 
deserted,  and  to-day  the  organization  is 
stronger  than  ever. 

*' How  was  that.^  It  was  because  Tam- 
many has  more  than  one  string  to  its 
bow. 

"I  acknowledge  that  you  can't  keep  an 
organization    together    without    patronage. 

[70] 


RECIPROCITY  IN   PATRONAGE 
Men  ain't  in  politics  for  nothin'.  They  want 
to  get  somethin'  out  of  it. 

"But  there  is  more  than  one  kind  of 
patronage.  We  lost  the  public  kind,  or  a 
greater  part  of  it  in  1901,  but  Tammany 
has  an  immense  private  ;^atronage  that 
keeps  things  goin'  when  it  gets  a  set  back  at 
the  polls. 

*'  Take  me,  for  instance.  When  Low  came 
in,  some  of  my  men  lost  public  jobs,  but  I 
fixed  them  all  right.  I  don't  know  how  many 
jobs  I  got  for  them  on  the  surface  and  ele- 
vated railroads  —  several  hundred. 

"  I  placed  a  lot  more  on  public  works  done 
by  contractors,  and  no  Tammany  man  goes 
hungry  in  my  district.  Plunkitt  's  O.  K.  on 
an  application  for  a  job  is  never  turned 
down,  for  they  all  know  that  Plunkitt  and 
Tammany  don't  stay  out  long.   See! 

*'  Let  me  tell  you,  too,  that  I  got  jobs  from 
Republicans  in  oflBce  —  Federal  and  other- 

[71] 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HAEL 
wise.  When  Tammany  's  on  top  I  do  good 
turns  for  the  RepubHcans.  When  they  're  on 
top  they  don't  forget  me. 

*'Me  and  the  RepubHcans  are  enemies 
just  one  day  in  the  year  —  election  day. 
Then  we  fight  tooth  and  nail.  The  rest  of  the 
time  it 's  live  and  let  live  with  us. 

*'  On  election  day  I  try  to  pile  up  as  big  a 
majority  as  I  can  against  George  Wan- 
maker,  the  Republican  leader  of  the  Fif- 
teenth. Any  other  day  George  and  I  are  the 
best  of  friends.  I  can  go  to  him  and  say: 
'  George,  I  want  you  to  place  this  friend  of 
mine,'  He  says:  *  All  right,  Senator.'  Or  vice 
versa. 

"  You  see,  we  differ  on  tariffs  and  curren- 
cies and  all  them  things,  but  we  agree  on  the 
main  proposition  that  when  a  man  works  in 
politics,  he  should  get  something  out  of  it. 

"The  politicians  have  got  to  stand  to- 
gether this  way  or  there  would  n't  be  any  po- 

[  72  ]) 


RECIPROCITY  IN  PATRONAGE 
litical  parties  in  a  short  time.  Civil  service 
would  gobble  up  everything,  politicians 
would  be  on  the  bum,  the  republic  would  fall 
and  soon  there  would  be  the  cry  of:  'Vevey 
le  roi ! ' 

"The  very  thought  of  this  civil  service 
monster  makes  my  blood  boil.  I  have  said  a 
lot  about  it  already,  but  another  instance  of 
its  awful  work  just  occurs  to  me. 

"  Let  me  tell  you  a  sad  but  true  story.  Last 
Wednesday  a  line  of  carriages  wound  into 
Calvary  Cemetery.  I  was  in  one  of  them.  It 
was  the  funeral  of  a  young  man  from  my  dis- 
trict —  a  bright  boy  that  I  had  great  hopes 
of. 

"  When  he  went  to  school,  he  was  the  most 
patriotic  boy  in  the  district.  Nobody  could 
sing  the  *Star  Spangled  Banner'  like  him, 
nobody  was  as  fond  of  waving  a  flag,  and  no- 
body shot  off  as  many  fire-crackers  on  the 
Fourth  of  July.  And  when  he  grew  up  he 

^    [73] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
made  up  his  mind  to  serve  his  country  in  one 
of  the  city  departments.  There  was  no  way 
of  gettin'  there  without  passin'  a  civil  ser- 
vice examination.  Well,  he  went  down  to  the 
civil  service  oflBce  and  tackled  the  fool  ques- 
tions. I  saw  him  next  day  —  it  was  Memor- 
ial Day,  and  soldiers  were  marchin'  and  flags 
flyin'  and  people  cheerin'. 

**  Where  was  my  young  man  ?  Standin'  on 
the  corner,  scowlin'  at  the  whole  show. 
When  I  asked  him  why  he  was  so  quiet,  he 
laughed  in  a  wild  sort  of  way  and  said ; 

"*Whatrotallthisis!' 

"Just  then  a  band  came  along  playing 
'  Liberty. ' 

"He  laughed  wild  again  and  said:  *  Lib- 
erty.? Rats!' 

"  I  don't  guess  1  need  to  make  a  long  story 
of  it. 

"From  the  time  that  young  man  left  the 
civil  service  oflSce  he  lost  all  patriotism.  He 

[74] 


RECIPROCITY   IN  PATRONAGE 
did  n't  care  no  more  for  his  country.   He 
went  to  the  dogs. 

**  He  ain't  the  only  one.  There  's  a  grave- 
stone over  some  bright  young  man's  head 
for  every  one  of  them  infernal  civil  service 
examinations.  They  are  underminin'  the 
manhood  of  the  nation  and  makin'  the  Dec- 
laration of  Independence  a  farce.  We  need  a 
new  Declaration  of  Independence  —  inde- 
pendence of  the  whole  fool  civil  service 
business. 

"  I  mention  all  this,  now  to  show  why  it  is 
that  the  politicians  of  two  big  parties  help 
each  other  along,  and  why  Tammany  men 
are  tolerably  happy  when  not  in  power  in  the 
city.  When  we  win  I  won't  let  any  deservin' 
Republican  in  my  neighborhood  suffer  from 
hunger  or  thirst,  although,  of  course,  I  look 
out  for  my  own  people  first. 

**  Now,  I  've  never  gone  in  for  non-parti- 
zan  business,  but  I  do  think  that  all  the  lead- 

[75] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

ers  of  the  two  parties  should  get  together  and 
make  an  open,  non-partizan  fight  against 
civil  service,  their  common  enemy.  They 
could  keep  up  their  quarrels  about  imperial- 
ism and  free  silver  and  high  tariff.  They 
don't  count  for  much  alongside  of  civil  ser- 
vice, which  strikes  right  at  the  root  of  the 
government. 

"The  time  is  fast  coming  when  civil  ser- 
vice or  the  politicians  will  have  to  go.  And  it 
will  be  here  sooner  than  they  expect  if  the 
politicians  don't  unite,  drop  all  them  minor 
issues  for  a  while  and  make  a  stand  against 
the  civil  service  flood  that 's  sweepin'  over 
the  country  like  them  floods  out  West. " 


[76] 


BROOKLYNITES  NATURAL-BORN 
HAYSEEDS 

oOME  people  are  wonderin'  why  it  is 
that  the  Brooklyn  Democrats  have  been 
sidin'  with  David  B.  Hill  and  the  up-State 
crowd.  There  's  no  cause  for  wonder.  I  hav^ 
made  a  careful  study  of  the  Brooklynite,  and 
I  can  tell  you  why.  It 's  because  a  Brook- 
lynite is  a  natural-born  hayseed,  and  can 
never  become  a  real  New  Yorker.  He  can't 
be  trained  into  it.  Consolidation  did  n't 
make  him  a  New  Yorker,  and  nothin'  on 
earth  can.  A  man  born  in  Germany  can 
settle  down  and  become  a  good  New  Yorker. 
So  can  an  Irishman ;  in  fact,  the  first  word  an 
Irish  boy  learns  in  the  old  country  is  *New 
York,'  and  when  he  grows  up  and  comes 

[77] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

here,  he  is  at  home  right  away.  Even  a  Jap 
or  a  Chinaman  can  become  a  New  Yorker, 
but  a  Brooklynite  never  can. 
vX  "And  why.?  Because  Brooklyn  don't 
seem  to  be  Hke  any  other  place  on  earth. 
Once  let  a  man  grow  up  amidst  Brooklyn's 
cobblestones,  with  the  odor  of  Newton 
Creek  and  Gowanus  Canal  ever  in  his  nos- 
trils, and  there  's  no  place  in  the  world  for 
him  except  Brooklyn.  And  even  if  he  don't 
grow  up  there;  if  he  is  born  there  and  lives 
there  only  in  his  boyhood  and  then  moves 
away,  he  is  still  beyond  redemption.  In  one 
of  my  speeches  in  the  Legislature,  I  gave  an 
example  of  this,  and  it  's  worth  repeatin' 
now.  Soon  after  I  became  a  leader  on  the 
West  Side,  a  quarter  of  a  century  ago,  I 
came  across  a  bright  boy,  about  seven  years 
old,  who  had  just  been  brought  over  from 
Brooklyn  by  his  parents.  I  took  an  interest 
in  the  boy,  and  when  he  grew  up  I  brought 

[78] 


NATURAL-BORN  HAYSEEDS 
him  into  politics.  Finally,  I  sent  him  to  the 
Assembly  from  my  district.  Now  remember 
that  the  boy  was  only  seven  years  old  when 
he  left  Brooklyn,  and  was  twenty-three 
when  he  went  to  the  Assembly.  You  'd  think 
he  had  forgotten  all  about  Brooklyn,  would- 
n't you.P  I  did,  but  I  was  dead  wrong. 
When  that  young  fellow  got  into  the  Assem- 
bly he  paid  no  attention  to  bills  or  debates 
about  New  York  City.  He  did  n't  even  show 
any  interest  in  his  own  district.  But  just  let 
Brooklyn  be  mentioned,  or  a  bill  be  intro- 
duced about  Gowanus  Canal,  or  the  Long 
Island  Railroad,  and  he  was  all  attention. 
Nothin'  else  on  earth  interested  him. 

"The  end  came  when  I  caught  him  — 
what  do  you  think  I  caught  him  at.^  One 
mornin'  I  went  over  from  the  Senate  to  the 
Assembly  chamber,  and  there  I  found  my 
young  man  readin'  —  actually  readin'  a 
Brooklyn    newspaper!    When    he    saw    me 

[79] 


/ 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

comin'  he  tried  to  hide  the  paper,  but  it  was 
too  late.  I  caught  him  dead  to  rights,  and  I 
said  to  him:  *  Jimmy,  I  'm  afraid  New  York 
ain't  fascinatin'  enough  for  you.  You  had 
better  move  back  to  Brooklyn  after  your 
present  term.'  And  he  did.  I  met  him  the 
other  day  crossin'  the  Brooklyn  Bridge, 
carryin'  a  hobby-horse  under  one  arm,  and  a 
doll's  carriage  under  the  other,  and  lookin' 
perfectly  happy. 

"McCarren  and  his  men  are  the  same 
way.  They  can't  get  it  into  their  heads  that 
they  are  New  Yorkers,  and  just  tend  natu- 
rally towards  supportin'  Hill  and  his  hay- 
seeds against  Murphy.  I  had  some  hopes  of 
McCarren  till  lately.  He  spends  so  much 
of  his  time  over  here  and  has  seen  so  much  of 
the  world  that  I  thought  he  might  be  an  ex- 
ception, and  grow  out  of  his  Brooklyn  sur- 
roundings, but  his  course  at  Albany  shows 
that  there  is  no  exception  to  the  rule.  Say, 

[80] 


NATURAL-BORN  HAYSEEDS 
I'd  rather  take  a  Hottentot  in  hand  to  bring 
up  as  a  good  New  Yorker  than  undertake 
the  job  with  a  Brooklynite.  Honest,  I  would. 
"And,  by  the  way,  come  to  think  of  it,  is 
there  really  any  up-State  Democrats  left  ?  It 
has  never  been  proved  to  my  satisfaction 
that  there  is  any.  I  know  that  some  up-State 
members  of  the  State  committee  call  them- 
selves Democrats.  Besides  these,  I  know  at 
least  six  more  men  above  the  Bronx  who 
make  a  livin'  out  of  professin'  to  be  Demo- 
crats, and  I  have  just  heard  of  some  few 
more.  But  if  there  is  any  real  Democrats  up 
the  State,  what  becomes  of  them  on  election 
day  ?  They  certainly  don't  go  near  the  polls 
or  they  vote  the  Republican  ticket.  Look  at 
the  last  three  State  elections !  Roosevelt  piled 
up  more  than  100,000  majority  above  the 
Bronx;  Odell  piled  up  about  160,000  ma- 
jority the  first  time  he  ran  and  131,000  the 
second  time.  About  all  the  Democratic  votes 

[81] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
cast  were  polled  in  New  York  City.  The  Re- 
publicans can  get  all  the  votes  they  want  up 
the  State.  Even  when  we  piled  up  123,000 
majority  for  Coler  in  the  city  in  1902,  the  Re- 
publicans went  it  8000  better  above  the 
Bronx. 

"That's  why  it  makes  me  mad  to  hear 
about  up-State  Democrats  controllin'  our 
State  convention,  and  sayin'  who  we  shall 
choose  for  President.  It 's  just  like  Staten 
Island  undertakin'  to  dictate  to  a  New  York 
City  convention.  I  remember  once  a  Syracuse 
man  came  to  Richard  Croker  at  the  Demo- 
cratic Club,  handed  him  a  letter  of  introduc- 
tion and  said : '  I  'm  lookin'  for  a  job  in  the 
Street  Cleanin'  Department;  I  'm  backed  by 
a  hundred  up-State  Democrats.'  Croker  look- 
ed hard  at  the  man  a  minute  and  then  said : 
*  Up-State  Democrats !  Up-State  Democrats ! 
I  did  n't  know  there  was  any  up-State  Dem- 
ocrats.  Just  walk  up  and  down   a    while 

[82] 


NATURAL-BORN  HAYSEEDS 
till  I  see  what  an  up-State  Democrat  looks 
like. ' 

"Another  thing.  When  a  campaign  is  on, 
did  you  ever  hear  on  an  up-State  Democrat 
makin'  a  contribution.?  Not  much.  Tam- 
many has  had  to  foot  the  whole  bill,  and 
when  any  of  Hill's  men  came  down  to  New 
York  to  help  him  in  the  campaign,  we  had  to 
pay  their  board.  Whenever  money  is  to  be 
raised,  there  's  nothin'  doin'  up  the  State. 
The  Democrats  there  —  always  providin* 
that  there  is  any  Democrats  there  —  take 
to  the  woods.  Supposin'  Tammany  turned 
over  the  campaigns  to  the  Hill  men  and 
then  held  off,  what  would  happen.?  Why, 
they  would  have  to  hire  a  shed  out  in  the 
suburbs  of  Albany  for  a  headquarters,  unless 
the  Democratic  National  Committee  put  up 
for  the  campaign  expenses.  Tammany's  got 
the  votes  and  the  cash.  The  Hill  crowd  's 
only  got  hot  air." 

[83] 


TAMMANY   LEADERS   NOT   BOOKWORMS 

L  V  OU  hear  a  lot  of  talk  about  the  Tam- 

many district  leaders  bein'  illiterate  men.  If 
illiterate  means  havin'  common  sense,  we 
plead  guilty.  But  if  they  mean  that  the  Tam- 
many leaders  ain't  got  no  education  and  ain't 
gents  they  don't  know  what  they  're  talkin' 
about.  Of  course,  we  ain't  all  bookworms 
and  college  professors.  If  we  were,  Tammany 
might  win  an  election  once  in  four  thousand 

\^  years.  Most  of  the  leaders  are  plain  Ameri- 
can citizens,  of  the  people  and  near  to  the 
people,  and  they  have  all  the  education  they 
need  to  whip  the  dudes  who  part  their  name 
in  the  middle  and  to  run  the  City  Govern- 
ment. We  've  got  bookworms,  too,  in  the 

V       [  84  ] 


LEADERS  NOT  BOOKWORMS 
organization.  But  we  don't  make  them  dis- 
trict leaders.  We  keep  them  for  ornaments 
on  parade  days. 

*' Tammany  Hall  is  a  great  big  machine, 
with  ever  part  adjusted  delicate  to  do  its  own 
particular  work.  It  runs  so  smooth  that  you 
would  n't  think  it  was  a  complicated  affair, 
but  it  is.  Every  district  leader  is  fitted  to  the 
district  he  runs  and  he  would  n't  exactly  fit 
any  other  district.  That 's  the  reason  Tam-. 
many  never  makes  the  mistake  the  Fusion 
outfit  always  makes  of  sendin'  men  into  the 
districts  who  don't  know  the  people,  and 
have  no  sympathy  with  their  peculiari- 
ties. We  don't  put  a  silk  stockin'  on  the  - 
Bowery,  nor  do  we  make  a  man  who  is 
handy  with  his  fists  leader  of  the  Twenty- 
ninth.  The  Fusionists  make  about  the  same 
sort  of  a  mistake  that  a  repeater  made  at  an 
election  in  Albany  several  years  ago.  He  was 
hired   to   go   to   the   polls  early  in  a  half- 

•    [85] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
dozen  election  districts  and  vote  on  other 
men's  names  before  these  men  reached  the 
polls.  At  one  place,  when  he  was  asked  his 
name  by  the  poll  clerk,  he  had  the  nerve  to 
answer  *  William  Croswell  Doane. ' 

*'*Come  off.  You  ain't  Bishop  Doane,' 
said  the  poll  clerk.' 

"*The  hell  I  ain't,  you '  yelled  the 

repeater. 

"Now,  that  is  the  sort  of  bad  judgment 
the  Fusionists  are  guilty  of.  They  don't  pick 
men  to  suit  the  work  they  have  to  do. 

"Take  me,  for  instance.  My  district,  the 
Fifteenth,  is  made  up  of  all  sorts  of  people, 
and  a  cosmopolitan  is  needed  to  run  it  suc- 
cessful. I  'm  a  cosmopolitan.  When  I  get  into 
the  silk-stockin'  part  of  the  district,  I  can 
talk  grammar  and  all  that  with  the  best  of 
them.  I  went  to  school  three  winters  when  I 
was  a  boy,  and  I  learned  a  lot  of  fancy  stuff' 
that  I  keep  for  occasions.   There  ain't  a  silk 

[86] 


LEADERS  NOT  BOOKWORMS 
stockin'  in  the  district  who  ain't  proud  to  be 
seen  talkin'  with  George  Washington  Plun- 
kitt,  and  maybe  they  learn  a  thing  or  two 
from  their  talks  with  me.  There  's  one  man 
in  the  district,  a  big  banker,  who  said  to  me 
one  day:  *  George,  you  can  sling  the  most 
vigorous  English  I  ever  heard.  You  remind 
me  of  Senator  Hoar  of  Massachusetts.'  Of 
course,  that  was  puttin'  it  on  too  thick;  but 
say,  honest,  I  like  Senator  Hoar's  speeches. 
He  once  quoted  in  the  United  States  Senate 
some  of  my  remarks  on  the  curse  of  civil  ser- 
vice, and,  though  he  did  n't  agree  with  me 
altogether,  I  noticed  that  our  ideas  are  alike 
in  some  things,  and  we  both  have  the  knack 
of  puttin'  things  strong,  only  he  put  on  more 
frills  to  suit  his  audience. 

"  As  for  the  common  people  of  the  district, 
I  am  at  home  with  them  at  all  times.  When  I 
go  among  them,  I  don't  try  to  show  off  my 
grammar,  or   talk  about  the  Constitution, 

[87] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
or  how  many  volts  there  is  in  electricity  or 
make  it  appear  in  any  way  that  I  am  better 
educated  than  they  are.  They  would  n't 
Vstand  for  that  sort  of  thing.  No;  I  drop  all 
monkey-shines.  So  you  see,  I  've  got  to  be 
several  sorts  of  a  man  in  a  single  day,  a  light- 
nin'  change  artist,  so  to  speak.  But  I  am  one 
sort  of  man  always  in  one  respect;  I  stick  to 
my  friends  high  and  low,  do  them  a  good 
turn  whenever  I  get  a  chance,  and  hunt^up^ 
all  the  jobs  going  for  my  constituents. 
There  ain't  a  man  in  New  York  who's  got 
such  a  scent  for  political  jobs  as  I  have. 
When  I  get  up  in  the  mornin'  I  can  al- 
most tell  every  time  whether  a  job  has 
become  vacant  over  night,  and  what  depart- 
ment it 's  in  and  I  'm  the  first  man  on  the 
ground  to  get  it.  Only  last  week  I  turned 
up  at  the  office  of  Water  Register  Savage 
at  9  A.  M.  and  told  him  I  wanted  a  vacant 
place    in    his    office  for    one   of    my    con- 

[88] 


LEADERS  NOT  BOOKWORMS 
stituents.  *  How  did  you  know  that  O'Brien 
had  got  out?'  he  asked  me.  'I  smelled 
it  in  the  air  when  I  got  up  this  mornin',' 
I  answered.  Now,  that  was  the  fact.  I 
did  n't  know  there  was  a  man  in  the  de- 
partment named  O'Brien,  much  less  that 
he  had  got  out,  but  my  scent  led  me  to  the 
Water  Register's  oflSce,  and  it  don't  often 
lead  me  wrong. 

"A  cosmopolitan  ain't  needed  in  all  the 
other  districts,  but  our  men  are  just  the  kind 
to  rule.  There  's  Dan  Finn,  in  the  Battery 
district,  bluff,  jolly  Dan,  who  is  now  on  the 
bench.  Maybe  you  'd  think  that  a  court  jus- 
tice is  not  the  man  to  hold  a  district  like  that, 
but  you  're  mistaken.  Most  of  the  voters  of 
the  district  are  the  janitors  of  the  big  oflSce 
buildings  on  lower  Broadway  and  their 
helpers.  These  janitors  are  the  most  digni- 
fied and  haughtiest  of  men.  Even  I  would 
have  trouble  in  holding  them.  Nothin'  less 

[89] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
than  a  judge  on  the  bench  is  good  enough  for 
them.  Dan  does  the  dignity  act  with  the 
janitors,  and  when  he  is  with  the  boys  he 
hangs  up  the  ermine  in  the  closet  and  be- 
comes a  jolly  good  fellow. 

'*Big  Tom  Foley,  leader  of  the  Second 
district,  fits  in  exactly,  too.  Tom  sells  whis- 
ky, and  good  whisky,  and  he  is  able  to  take 
care  of  himself  against  a  half  dozen  thugs  if 
he  runs  up  against  them  on  Cherry  Hill  or  in 
Chatham  Square.  Pat  Ryder  and  Johnnie 
Ahearn  of  the  Third  and  Fourth  districts 
are  just  the  men  for  the  places.  Ahearn 's  con- 
stituents are  about  half  Irishmen  and  half 
Jews.  He  is  as  popular  with  one  race  as  with 
the  other.  He  eats  corned  beef  and  kosher 
meat  with  equal  nonchalance,  and  it 's  all 
the  same  to  him  whether  he  takes  off  his  hat 
in  the  church  or  pulls  it  down  over  his  ears  in 
the  synagogue. 

"The  other  downtown  leaders,   Barney 

[90] 


LEADERS  NOT  BOOKWORMS 
Martin  of  the  Fifth,  Tim  SulHvan  of  the 
Sixth,  Pat  Keahon  of  the  Seventh,  Florrie 
SuUivan  of  the  Eighth,  Frank  Goodwin  of 
the  Ninth,  Juhus  Harburger  of  the  Tenth, 
Pete  DooUng  of  the  Eleventh,  Joe  Scully  of 
the  Twelfth,  Johnnie  Oakley  of  the  Four- 
teenth, and  Pat  Keenan  of  the  Sixteenth  are 
just  built  to  suit  the  people  they  have  to  deal 
with.  They  don't  go  in  for  literary  busi- 
ness much  downtown,  but  these  men  are  all 
real  gents,  and  that 's  what  the  people  want 
—  even  the  poorest  tenement  dwellers.  As 
you  go  farther  uptown  you  find  rather  dif- 
ferent kind  of  district  leaders.  There  's 
Victor  Dowling  who  was  until  lately  the 
leader  of  the  Twenty-fourth.  He  's  a 
lulu.  He  knows  the  Latin  grammar  back- 
ward. What  's  strange,  he  's  a  sensible 
young  fellow,  too.  About  once  in  a  century 
we  come  across  a  fellow  like  that  in  Tam- 
many politics.    James  J.  Martin,  leader  of 

[91] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
the  Twenty-seventh,  is  also  something  of 
a  hightoner,  and  pubHshes  a  law  paper, 
while  Thomas  E.  Rush,  of  the  Twenty- 
ninth,  is  a  lawyer,  and  Isaac  Hopper,  of  the 
Thirty-first,  is  a  big  contractor.  The  down- 
town leaders  would  n't  do  uptown,  and  vice 
versa.  So,  you  see,  these  fool  critics  don't 
know  what  they  're  talkin'  about  when  they 

criticise  Tammany  Hall,  the  most  perfect 

political  machine  on  earth." 


[92] 


DANGERS   OF    THE    DRESS-SUIT 
IN    POLITICS 

1  UTTIN'  on  style  don't  pay  in  politics. 
The  people  won't  stand  for  it.  If  you  've  got 
an  achin'  for  style,  sit  down  on  it  till  you 
have  made  your  pile  and  landed  a  Supreme 
Court  Justiceship  with  a  fourteen-year  term 
at  $17,500  a  year,  or  some  job  of  that  kind. 
Then  you  've  got  about  all  you  can  get  out  of 
politics,  and  you  can  afford  to  wear  a  dress- 
suit  all  day  and  sleep  in  it  all  night  if  you 
have  a  mind  to.  But,  before  you  have  caught 
onto  your  life  meal-ticket,  be  simple.  Live 
like  your  neighbors  even  if  you  have  the 
means  to  live  better.  Make  the  poorest  man 
in  your  district  feel  that  he  is  your  equal,  or 
even  a  bit  superior  to  you. 

[93] 


/ 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

"Above  all  things,  avoid  a  dress-suit.  You 
have  no  idea  of  the  harm  that  dress-suits 
have  done  in  politics.  They  are  not  so  fatal 
to  young  politicians  as  civil  service  reform 
and  drink,  but  they  have  scores  of  victims.  I 
will  mention  one  sad  case.  After  the  big 
Tammany  victory  in  1897,  Richard  Croker 
went  down  to  Lakewood  to  make  up  the 
slate  of  oJBSces  for  Mayor  Van  Wyck  to  dis- 
tribute. All  the  district  leaders  and  many 
more  Tammany  men  went  down  there,  too, 
to  pick  up  anything  good  that  was  goin'. 
There  was  nothin'  but  dress-suits  at  dinner 
at  Lakewood,  and  Croker  would  n't  let  any 
Tammany  men  go  to  dinner  without  them. 
Well,  a  bright  young  West  Side  politician, 
who  held  a  three  thousand  dollar  job  in  one 
of  the  departments,  went  to  Lakewood  to 
ask  Croker  for  something  better.  He  wore  a 
dress-suit  for  the  first  time  in  his  life.  It  was 
his  undoin'.  He  got  stuck  on  himself.  He 

194] 


THE  DRESS-SUIT  IN  POLITICS 
thought  he  looked  too  beautiful  for  anything, 
and  when  he  came  home  he  was  a  changed 
man.  As  soon  as  he  got  to  his  house  every 
evenin'  he  put  on  that  dress-suit  and  set 
around  in  it  until  bedtime.  That  did  n't  sat- 
isfy him  long.  He  wanted  others  to  see  how 
beautiful  he  was  in  a  dress-suit;  so  he  joined 
dancin'  clubs  and  began  goin'  to  all  the  balls 
that  was  given  in  town.  Soon  he  began  to 
neglect  his  family.  Then  he  took  to  drinkin', 
and  did  n't  pay  any  attention  to  his  political 
work  in  the  district.  The  end  came  in  less 
than  a  year.  He  was  dismissed  from  the  de- 
partment and  went  to  the  dogs.  The  other 
day  I  met  him  rigged  out  almost  like  a  hobo, 
but  he  still  had  a  dress-suit  vest  on.  When  I 
asked  him  what  he  was  doin',  he  said: 
**Nothin'  at  present,  but  I  got  a  promise 
of  a  job  enroUin'  voters  at  Citizens'  Union 
headquarters."  Yes,  a  dress-suit  had 
brought  him  that  low! 

[95] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

*'  I'll  tell  you  another  ease  right  in  my  own 
Assembly  District.  A  few  years  ago  I  had  as 
one  of  my  lieutenants  a  man  named  Zeke 
Thompson.  He  did  fine  work  for  me  and  I 
thought  he  had  a  bright  future.  One  day  he 
came  to  me,  said  he  intended  to  buy  an  option 
on  a  house,  and  asked  me  to  help  him  out.  I 
like  to  see  a  young  man  acquirin'  property 
and  I  had  so  much  confidence  in  Zeke  that  I 
put  up  for  him  on  the  house. 

"A  month  or  so  afterwards  I  heard  strange 
rumors.  People  told  me  that  Zeke  was  be- 
ginnin'  to  put  on  style.  They  said  he  had  a 
billiard-table  in  his  house  and  had  hired  Jap 
servants.  I  could  n't  believe  it.  The  idea  of 
a  Democrat,  a  follower  of  George  Washing- 
ton Plunkitt  in  the  Fifteenth  Assembly  Dis- 
trict havin'  a  billiard-table  and  Jap  serv- 
ants! One  mornin'  I  called  at  the  house  to 
give  Zeke  a  chance  to  clear  himself.  A  Jap 
opened  the  door  for  me.  I  saw  the  billiard- 

[96] 


THE   DRESS-SUIT   IN   POLITICS 

table.  Zeke  was  guilty!  When  I  got  over  the 
shock,  I  said  to  Zeke :  '  You  are  caught  with 
the  goods  on.  No  excuses  will  go.  The  Demo- 
crats of  this  district  ain't  used  to  dukes  and 
princes  and  we  would  n't  feel  comfortable  in 
your  company.  You  'd  overpower  us.  You 
had  better  move  up  to  the  Nineteenth  or 
Twenty-seventh  District,  and  hang  a  silk 
stocking  on  your  door. '  He  went  up  to  the 
Nineteenth,  turned  Republican,  and  was 
lookin'  for  an  Albany  job  the  last  I  heard  of 
him. 

''  Now,  nobody  ever  saw  me  puttin'  on  any 
style.  I  'm  the  same  Plunkitt  I  was  when  I 
entered  politics  forty  years  ago.  That  is  why 
the  people  of  the  district  have  confidence  in 
me.  If  I  went  into  the  stylish  business,  even 
I,  Plunkitt,  might  be  thrown  down  in  the 
district.  That  was  shown  pretty  clearly  in 
the  senatorial  fight  last  year.  A  day  before 
the  election,  my  enemies  circulated  a  report 

[97] 


H. 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
that  I  had  ordered  a  $10,000  automobile 
and  a  $125  dress-suit.  I  sent  out  contradic- 
tions as  fast  as  I  could,  but  I  was  n't  able  to 
stamp  out  the  infamous  slander  before  the 
votin'  was  over,  and  I  suffered  some  at  the 
polls.  The  people  would  n't  have  minded 
much  if  I  had  been  accused  of  robbin'  the 
city  treasury,  for  they  're  used  to  slanders  of 
that  kind  in  campaigns,  but  the  automobile 
and  the  dress-suit  were  too  much  for  them. 

"Another  thing  that  people  won't  stand  for 
is  showin'  off  your  learnin'.  That 's  just  put- 
tin'  on  style  in  another  way.  If  you  're  makin' 
speeches  in  a  campaign,  talk  the  language 
the  people  talk.  Don't  try  to  show  how  the 
situation  is  by  quotin'  Shakspere.  Shaks- 
pere  was  all  right  in  his  way,  but  he  did  n't 
know  anything  about  Fifteenth  District  poli- 
tics. If  you  know  Latin  and  Greek  and  have 
a  hankerin'  to  work  them  off  on  somebody, 
hire  a  stranger  to  come  to  your  house  and 

[98] 


THE  DRESS-SUIT  IN  POLITICS 
listen  to  you  for  a  couple  of  hours;  then  go 
out  and  talk  the  language  of  the  Fifteenth  to 
the  people.  I  know  it 's  an  awful  temptation, 
the  hankerin'  to  show  off  your  learnin'. 
I  've  felt  it  myself,  but  I  always  resist  it.  I 
know  the  awful  consequences." 


[99] 


ON   MUNICIPAL   OWNERSHIP 


4  ( 


1  AM  for  municipal  ownership  on  one 
condition  —  that  the  civil  service  law  be  re- 
pealed. It 's  a  grand  idea  —  the  city  ownin' 
the  railroads,  the  gas  works  and  all  that. 
Just  see  how  many  thousands  of  new  places 
there  would  be  for  the  workers  in  Tammany ! 
Why,  there  would  be  almost  enough  to  go 
around  —  if  no  civil  service  law  stood  in 
the  way.  My  plan  is  this:  first  get  rid  of 
that  infamous  law,  and  then  go  ahead  and 
by  degrees  get  municipal  ownership. 

"  Some  of  the  reformers  are  sayin'  that 
municipal  ownership  won't  do  because  it 
would  give  a  lot  of  patronage  to  the  politic- 
ians. How  those  fellows  mix  things  up  when 

[  100  ] 


MUNICIPAL  OWNERSHIP 

they  argue!  They  're  givin'  the  s^.rongest 
argument  in  favor  of  municipal  owi  ership 
when  they  say  that.  Who  is  better  fitted  to 
run  the  railroads  and  the  gas  plants  and  the 
ferries  than  the  men  who  make  a  business  of 
lookin'  after  the  interests  of  the  city  ?  Who  is 
more  anxious  to  serve  the  city?  Who  reeds 
the  jobs  more? 

**  Look  at  the  Dock  Department!  The  city 
owns  the  docks,  and  how  beautiful  Tam- 
many manages  them!  I  can't  tell  you  how 
many  places  they  provide  for  our  workers. 
I  know  there  is  a  lot  of  talk  about  dock 
graft,  but  that  talk  comes  from  the  outs. 
When  the  Republicans  had  the  docks 
under  Low  and  Strong,  you  did  n't  hear 
them  sayin'  anything  about  graft,  did 
you?  No;  they  just  went  in  and  made 
hay  while  the  sun  shone.  That  's  always 
the  case.  When  the  reformers  are  out  they 
raise  the  yell  that  Tammany  men  should 

[101] 


PIUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

be  sent  to  jail.  When  they  get  in,  they  're 
so  busy  keepin'  out  of  jail  themselves 
that  they  don't  have  no  time  to  attack 
Tajumany. 

"All  I  want  is  that  municipal  ownership  be 
postponed  till  I  get  my  bill  repealin'  the  civil 
service  law  before  the  next  legislature.  It 
would  be  all  a  mess  if  every  man  who  wanted 
a  job  would  have  to  run  up  against  a  civil 
service  examination.  For  instance,  if  a  man 
wanted  a  job  as  motorman  on  a  surface  car, 
it  's  ten  to  one  that  they  would  ask  him: 
*  Who  wrote  the  Latin  grammar,  and,  if  so, 
why  did  he  write  it.^  How  many  years  were 
you  at  college  ?  Is  there  any  part  of  the  Greek 
language  you  don't  know?  State  all  you 
don't  know,  and  why  you  don't  know  it. 
Give  a  list  of  all  the  sciences  with  full  par- 
ticulars about  each  one  and  how  it  came  to 
be  discovered.  Write  out  word  for  word  the 
last  ten  decisions  of  the  United  States  Su- 

[102] 


MUNICIPAL  OWNERSHIP 
preme  Court  and  show  if  they  conflict  with 
the  last  ten  decisions  of  the  police  courts  of 
New  York  City. ' 

**  Before  the  would-be  motorman  left  the 
civil  service  room,  the  chances  are  he  would 
be  a  raving  lunatic.  Anyhow  I  would  n't  like 
to  ride  on  his  car.  Just  here  I  want  to  say  one 
last  final  word  about  civil  service.  In  the  last 
ten  years  I  have  made  an  investigation  which 
I  've  kept  quiet  till  this  time.  Now  I  have  all 
the  figures  together,  and  I  'm  ready  to  an- 
nounce the  result.  My  investigation  was  to*^ 
find  out  how  many  civil  service  reformers,  and 
how  many  politicians  were  in  state  prisons. 
I  discovered  that  there  was  forty  per  cent 
more  civil  service  reformers  among  the  jail- 
birds. If  any  legislative  committee  wants  the 
detailed  figures,  I  '11  prove  what  I  say.  I 
don't  want  to  give  the  figures  now,  because  I 
want  to  keep  them  to  back  me  up  when  I  go 
to  Albany  to  get  the  civil  service  law  repealed. 

[103] 


X 


PLUNKITT  OP  TAMMANY  HALL 
Don't  you  think  that  when  I  've  had 
my  inning,  the  civil  service  law  will  go  down, 
and  the  people  will  see  that  the  politicians 
are  all  right,  and  that  they  ought  to  have  the 
job  of  runnin'  things  when  municipal  owner- 
ship comes  ? 

"  One  thing  more  about  municipal  owner- 
ship. If  the  city  owned  the  railroads,  etc., 
salaries  would  be  sure  to  go  up.  Higher  sal- 
aries is  the  cryin'  need  of  the  day.  Municipal 
ownership  would  increase  them  all  along  the 
line  and  would  stir  up  such  patriotism  as 
New  York  City  never  knew  before.  You 
can't  be  patriotic  on  a  salary  that  just  keeps 
the  wolf  from  the  door.  Any  man  who  pre- 
tends he  can  will  bear  watchin'.  Keep  your 
hand  on  your  watch  and  pocket-book  when 
he  's  about.  But,  when  a  man  has  a  good  fat 
salary,  he  finds  himself  hummin'  *Hail 
Columbia,'  all  unconscious  and  he  fancies, 
when  he  's  ridin'  in  a  trolley-car,  that  the 

V      [104] 


MUNICIPAL  OWNERSHIP 
wheels  are  always  sayin' :  '  Yankee  Doodle 
Came  to  Town.'  I  know  how  it  is  myself. 
When  I  got  my  first  good  job  from  the  city  I 
bought  up  all  the  fire -crackers  in  my  district 
to  salute  this  glorious  country.  I  could  n't 
wait  for  the  Fourth  of  July.  I  got  the  boys  on 
the  block  to  fire  them  off  for  me,  and  I  felt 
proud  of  bein'  an  American.  For  a  long  time 
after  that  I  use  to  wake  up  nights  singin'  the 
'  Star  Spangled  Banner. '  " 


[105] 


TAMMANY   THE    ONLY   LASTIN* 
DEMOCRACY 


1  'VE  seen  more  than  one  hundred  *  De- 
mocracies '  rise  and  fall  in  New  York  City  in 
the  last  quarter  of  a  century.  At  least  a  half- 
dozen  new  so-called  Democratic  organiza- 
tions are  formed  every  year.  All  of  them  go  in 
to  down  Tammany  and  take  its  place,  but 
they  seldom  last  more  than  a  year  or  two, 
while  Tammany  's  like  the  everlastin'  rocks, 
the  eternal  hills  and  the  blockades  on  the 
'  L '  road  —  it  goes  on  forever. 

"I  recall  off-hand  the  County  Democracy, 
which  was  the  only  real  opponent  Tammany 
has  had  in  my  time,  the  Irving  Hall  Democ- 
racy, the  New  York  State  Democracy,  the 
German-American  Democracy,  the  Protec- 

[  106  ] 


THE  ONLY  LASTIN'  DEMOCRACY 

tion  Democracy,  the  Independent  County 
Democracy,  the  Greater  New  York  Democ- 
racy, the  Jimmy  O'Brien  Democracy,  the 
DeKcatessen  Dealers'  Democracy,  the  Sil- 
ver Democracy,  and  the  Italian  Democracy. 
Not  one  of  them  is  livin'  to-day,  although 
I  hear  somethin'  about  the  ghost  of  the 
Greater  New  York  Democracy  bein'  seen 
on  Broadway  once  or  twice  a  year. 

"In  the  old  days  of  the  County  Democ- 
racy, a  new  Democratic  organization  meant 
some  trouble  for  Tammany  —  for  a  time 
anyhow.  Nowadays  a  new  Democracy  means 
nothin'  at  all  except  that  about  a  dozen 
bone-hunters  have  got  together  for  one  cam- 
paign only  to  try  to  induce  Tammany  to 
give  them  a  job  or  two,  or  in  order  to  get  in 
with  the  reformers  for  the  same  purpose. 
You  might  think  that  it  would  cost  a  lot  of 
money  to  get  up  one  of  these  organizations 
and  keep  it  goin'  for  even  one  campaign, 

[107] 


S^rtf- 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
but.  Lord  bless  you!  it  costs  next  to  nothin'. 
Jimmy  O'Brien  brought  the  manufacture  of 
'Democracies'  down  to  an  exact  science, 
and  reduced  the  cost  of  production  so  as  to 
bring  it  within  the  reach  of  all.  Any  man  with 
$50  can  now  have  a  'Democracy'  of  his  own. 
"I  've  looked  into  the  industry,  and  can 
give  rock-bottom  figures.  Here  's  the  items 
of  cost  of  a  new  '  Democracy : ' 

A  dinner  to  twelve  bone-hunters $12.00 

A  speech  on  Jeffersonian  Democracy 00.00 

A  proclamation  of  principles  (typewriting)    .     .     .  2.00 

Rent  of  a  small  room  one  month  for  headquarters.  12.00 

Stationery 2.00 

Twelve  second-hand  chairs 6.00 

One  second-hand  table        2.00 

Twenty-nine  cuspidors 9.00 

Sign-painting 5.00 

Total $50.00 

*'Is  there  any  reason  for  wonder  then, 
that  '  Democracies '  spring  up  all  over  when 
a  municipal  campaign  is  comin'  on  ?  If  you 

[108] 


THE  ONLY  LASTIN'  DEMOCRACY 
land  even  one  small  job,  you  get  a  big  return 
on  your  investment.  You  don't  have  to  pay  - 
for  advertisin'  in  the  papers.  The  New  York 
papers  tumble  over  one  another  to  give  col- 
umns to  any  new  organization  that  comes 
out  against  Tammany.  In  describin'  the 
formation  of  a '  Democracy '  on  the  $50  basis, 
accordin'  to  the  items  I  give,  the  papers 
would  say  somethin'  like  this:  *The  organi- 
zation of  the  Delicatessen  Democracy  last 
night  threatens  the  existence  of  Tammany 
Hall.  It  is  a  grand  move  for  a  new  and 
pure  Democracy  in  this  city.  Well  may  the 
Tammany  leaders  be  alarmed,  Panic  has 
already  broke  loose  in  Fourteenth  Street.  The 
vast  crowd  that  gathered  at  the  launching  of 
the  new  organization,  the  stirrin'  speeches 
and  the  proclamation  of  principles  mean  that, 
at  last,  there  is  an  uprisin'  that  will  end  Tam- 
many's career  of  corruption.  The  Delicates- 
sen Democracy  will  open  in  a  few  days  spa- 

[  109  ] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

cious  headquarters  where  all  true  Democrats 
may  gather  and  prepare  for  the  fight.' 

"  Say,  ain't  some  of  the  papers  awful  gul- 
lible about  politics  ?  Talk  about  come-ons 
from  Iowa  or  Texas  —  they  ain't  in  it  with 
the  childlike  simplicity  of  these  papers. 

"  It 's  a  wonder  to  me  that  more  men  don't 
go  into  this  kind  of  manuf  acturin'  industry.  It 
has  bigger  profits  generally  than  the  green- 
goods  business  and  none  of  the  risks.  And  you 
don't  have  to  invest  as  much  as  the  green- 
.  goods  men.  Just  see  what  good  things  some  of 
these  *  Democracies '  got  in  the  last  few  years ! 
The  New  York  State  Democracy  in  1897, 
landed  a  Supreme  Court  Justiceship  for  the 
man  who  manufactured  the  concern — a  four- 
teen-year term  at  $17,500  a  year,  that  is, $245,- 
000.  You  see,  Tammany  was  rather  scared 
that  year  and  was  bluffed  into  givin'this  job  to 
get  the  support  of  the  State  Democracy  which, 
by  the  way,  went  out  of  business  quick  and 

[110] 


THE  ONLY  LASTIN'  DEMOCRACY 
prompt  the  day  after  it  got  this  big  plum. 
"The  next  year  the  German  Democracy 
landed  a  place  of  the  same  kind.  And  then 
see  how  the  Greater  New  York  Democracy 
worked  the  game  on  the  reformers  in  1901! 
The  men  who  managed  this  concern  were 
former  Tammanyites  who  had  lost  their 
grip;  yet  they  made  the  Citizens'  Union  in- 
nocents believe  that  they  were  the  real  thing 
in  the  way  of  reformers,  and  that  they  had 
100,000  votes  back  of  them.  They  got  the 
Borough  President  of  Manhattan,  the  Presi- 
dent of  the  Board  of  Aldermen,  the  Register 
and  a  lot  of  lesser  places.  It  was  the  greatest 
bunco  game  of  modern  times. 

"And  then,  in  1894,  when  Strong  was 
elected  mayor,  what  a  harvest  it  was  for  all 
the  little  '  Democracies '  that  was  made  to  or- 
der that  year!  Every  one  of  them  got  some- 
thin'  good.  In  one  case,  all  the  nine  men  in 
an  organization  got  jobs  payin'  from  $2000 

[111] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
to  $5000.  I  happen  to  know  exactly  what  it 
cost  to  manufacture  that  organization.  It 
was  $42.04.  They  left  out  the  stationery,  and 
had  only  twenty-three  cuspidors.  The  extra 
four  cents  was  for  two  postage  stamps. 

"  The  only  reason  I  can  imagine  why  more 
men  don't  go  into  this  industry  is  because 
they  don't  know  about  it.  And  just  here  it 
strikes  me  that  it  might  not  be  wise  to  pub- 
lish what  I  've  said.  Perhaps  if  it  gets  to  be 
known  what  a  snap  this  manufacture  of 
*  Democracies '  is,  all  the  green-goods  men, 
the  bunco-steerers,  and  the  young  Napo- 
leons of  finance,  will  go  into  it  and  the  public 
will  be  humbugged  more  than  it  has  been. 
But,  after  all,  what  difference  would  it 
make  ?  There  's  always  a  certain  number  of 
suckers  and  a  certain  number  of  men  lookin' 
for  a  chance  to  take  them  in,  and  the  suckers 
are  sure  to  be  took  one  way  or  another.  It 's 
the  everlastin'  law  of  demand  and  supply." 

[112] 


CONCERNING  GAS  IN   POLITICS 

oINCE  the  eighty-cent  gas  bill  was  de- 
feated in  Albany,  everybody's  talkin'  about 
senators  bein'  bribed.  Now,  I  wasn't  in 
the  Senate  last  session,  and  I  don't  know  the 
ins  and  outs  of  everything  that  was  done,  but 
I  can  tell  you  that  the  legislators  are  often 
hauled  over  the  coals  when  they  are  all  on 
the  level.  I  've  been  there  and  I  know.  For 
instance,  when  I  voted  in  the  Senate  in  1904, 
for  the  Remsen  Bill,  that  the  newspapers 
called  the  'Astoria  Gas  Grab  Bill,'  they 
did  n't  do  a  thing  to  me.  The  papers  kept  up 
a  howl  about  all  the  supporters  of  the  bill 
bein'  bought  up  by  the  Consolidated  Gas 
Company,  and  the  Citizens'  Union  did  me 

[113] 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

the  honor  to  call  me  the  commander-in- 
chief  of  the  *  Black  Horse  Cavalry. ' 

"  The  fact  is  that  I  was  workin'  for  my 
district  all  this  time,  and  I  was  n't  bribed  by 
nobody.  There 's  several  of  these  gas-houses 
in  the  district,  and  I  wanted  to  get  them  over 
to  Astoria  for  three  reasons:  First,  because 
they  're  nuisances;  second,  because  there  's 
no  votes  in  them  for  me  any  longer;  third,  be- 
cause —  well,  I  had  a  little  private  reason 
which  I  '11  explain  further  on.  I  need  n't 
explain  how  they  're  nuisances.  They  're 
worse  than  open  sewers.  Still,  I  might  have 
stood  that  if  they  had  n't  degenerated  so 
much  in  the  last  few  years. 

*' Ah,  gas-houses  ain't  what  they  used  to  be ! 
Not  very  long  ago,  each  gas-house  was  good 
for  a  couple  of  hundred  votes.  All  the  men 
employed  in  them  were  Irishmen  and  Ger- 
mans who  lived  in  the  district.  Now,  it  is  all 
different.    The   men    are   dagoes   who   live 

[114] 


GAS  IN  POLITICS 
across  in  Jersey  and   take  no  interest  in 
the  district.  What  's  the  use  of  havin'  ill- 
smeUin'  gas-houses  if  there  's  no  votes  in 
them  ? 

"Now,  as  to  my  private  reason.  Well,  I  'm 
a  business  man  and  go  in  for  any  business 
that 's  profitable  and  honest.  Real  estate  is 
one  of  my  specialties.  I  know  the  value  of 
every  foot  of  ground  in  my  district,  and  I 
calculated  long  ago  that  if  them  gas-houses 
was  removed,  surroundin'  property  would 
go  up  100  per  cent.  When  the  Remsen 
Bill,  providin'  for  the  removal  of  the  gas- 
houses  to  Queens  County  came  up,  I  said 
to  myself :  *  George,  has  n't  your  chance 
come.?'  I  answered:  *Sure. '  Then  I  sized 
up  the  chances  of  the  bill.  I  found  it  was  cer- 
tain to  pass  the  Senate  and  the  Assembly, 
and  I  got  assurances  straight  from  head- 
quarters that  Governor  Odell  would  sign  it. 
Next  I  came  down  to  the  city  to  find  out  the 

[115] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
mayor's  position.  I  got  it  straight  that  he 
would  approve  the  bill,  too. 

^^  *'  Can't  you  guess  what  I  did  then  ?  Like 
any  sane  man  who  had  my  information,  I 
went  in  and  got  options  on  a  lot  of  the 
property  around  the  gas-houses.  Well,  the 
bill  went  through  the  Senate  and  the  Assem- 
bly all  right  and  the  mayor  signed  it,  but 
Odell  baekslided  at  the  last  minute  and  the 
«whole  game  fell  through.  If  it  had  succeeded, 
I  guess  I  would  have  been  accused  of 
graftin'.  What  I  want  to  know  is,  what  do 
you  call  it  when  I  got  left  and  lost  a  pot  of 
money  ? 

**  I  not  only  lost  money,  but  I  was  abused  for 
votin'  for  the  bill.  Was  n't  that  outrageous  ? 

V  They  said  I  was  in  with  the  Consolidated 
Gas  Company  and  all  other  kinds  of  rot, 
when  I  was  really  only  workin'  for  my  dis- 
trict and  tryin'  to  turn  an  honest  penny  on 
the  side.  Anyhow  I  got  a  little  fun  out  of  the 

[116] 


GAS  IN  POLITICS 
business.  When  the  Remsen  Bill  was  up,  I 
was  tryin'  to  put  through  a  bill  of  my  own  — 
the  Spuyten  Duyvil  Bill,  which  provided  for 
fillin'  in  some  land  under  water  that  the  New 
York  Central  Railroad  wanted.  Well,  the 
Remsen  managers  were  afraid  of  bein' 
beaten  and  they  went  around  offerin'  to 
make  trades  with  senators  and  assembly- 
men who  had  bills  they  were  anxious  to  pass. 
They  came  to  me  and  offered  six  votes  for 
my  Spuyten  Duyvil  Bill  in  exchange  for  my 
vote  on  the  Remsen  Bill.  I  took  them  up  in 
a  hurry,  and  they  felt  pretty  sore  afterwards 
when  they  heard  I  was  goin'  to  vote  for  the 
Remsen  Bill  anyhow. 

"A  word  about  that  Spuyten  Duyvil  Bill, 
I  was  criticized  a  lot  for  introducin'  it.  They 
said  I  was  workin'  in  the  interest  of  the 
New  York  Central,  and  was  goin'  to  get 
the  contract  for  fillin'  in.  The  fact  is,  that 
the  fillin'   in    was    a    good    thing   for   the 

[117] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
city,  and  if  it  helped  the  New  York  Cen- 
tral, too,  what  of  it?  That  railroad  is  a 
great  public  institution,  and  I  was  never  an 
enemy  of  public  institutions.  As  to  the  con- 
tract, it  has  n't  come  along  yet.  If  it  does 
come,  it  will  find  me  at  home  at  all  proper 
and  reasonable  hours,  if  there  is  a  good 
profit  in  sight. 

*'  The  papers  and  some  people  are  always 
ready  to  find  wrong  motives  in  what  us 
statesmen  do.  If  we  bring  about  some  big 
improvement  that  benefits  the  city  and  it 
just  happens,  as  a  sort  of  coincidence,  that 
we  make  a  few  dollars  out  of  the  improve- 
ment, they  say  we  are  grafters.  But  we  are 
used  to  this  kind  of  ingratitude.  It  falls  to 
the  lot  of  all  statesmen,  especially  Tammany 
statesmen.  All  we  can  do  is  to  bow  our  heads 
in  silence  and  wait  till  time  has  cleared  our 
memories. 

"Just  think  of  mentionin'  dishonest  graft  in 

[118] 


GAS  IN  POLITICS 
connection  with  the  name  of  George  Wash- 
ington Plunkitt,  the  man  who  gave  the  city 
its  magnificent  chain  of  parks,  its  Washing- 
ton Bridge,  its  Speedway,  its  Museum  of 
Natural  History,  its  One  Hundred  and  Fifty- 
fifth  Street  Viaduct  and  its  West  Side  Court- 
house! I  was  the  father  of  the  bills  that  pro- 
vided for  all  these ;  yet,  because  I  supported 
the  Remsen  and  Spuyten  Duyvil  Bills,  some 
people  have  questioned  my  honest  motives. 
If  that 's  the  case,  how  can  you  expect  legis- 
lators to  fare  who  are  not  the  fathers  of  the 
parks,  the  Washington  Bridge,  the  Speed- 
way and  the  Viaduct? 

"Now,  understand;  I  ain't  defendin'  the 
senators  who  killed  the  eighty-cent  gas  bill. 
I  don't  know  why  they  acted  as  they  did ;  I 
only  want  to  impress  the  idea  to  go  slow 
before  you  make  up  your  mind  that  a  man, 
occupyin'  the  exalted  position  that  I  held  for 
so  many  years,  has  done  wrong.  For  all  I 

[119] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
know,    these   senators   may   have   been    as 
honest  and  high-minded  about  the  gas  bill 
as  I  was  about  the  Remsen  and  Spuyten 
Duyvil  bills." 


[120] 


plunkitt's  fondest  dream 


1  HE  time  is  comin'  and,  though  I  'm  no 
youngster,  I  may  see  it,  when  New  York 
City  will  break  away  from  the  State  and  be- 
come a  state  itself.  It 's  got  to  come.  The 
feelin*  between  this  city  and  the  hayseeds 
that  make  a  livin'  by  plunderin'  it  is  every 
bit  as  bitter  as  the  feelin'  between  the  North 
and  South  before  the  war.  And,  let  me  tell 
you,  if  there  ain't  a  peaceful  separation  be- 
fore long,  we  may  have  the  horrors  of  civil 
war  right  here  in  New  York  State.  Why,  I 
know  a  lot  of  men  in  my  district  who  would 
like  nothin'  better  to-day  than  to  go  out 
gunnin'  for  hayseeds ! 

**  New  York  City  has  got  a  bigger  popula- 

[121] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
tion  than  most  of  the  States  in  the  Union. 
It 's  got  more  wealth  than  any  dozen  of 
them.  Yet  the  people  here,  as  I  explained 
before,  are  nothin'  but  slaves  of  the  Albany 
gang.  We  have  stood  the  slavery  a  long,  long 
/  time,  but  the  uprisin'  is  near  at  hand.  It  will 
be  a  fight  for  liberty,  just  like  the  American 
Revolution.  We'  11  get  liberty  peacefully  if 
we  can;  by  cruel  war  if  we  must. 

'*Just  think  how  lovely  things  would  be 
here  if  we  had  a  Tammany  Governor  and  leg- 
islature meetin',  say  in  the  neighborhood  of 
Fifty-ninth  Street,  and  a  Tammany  Mayor 
and  Board  of  Aldermen  doin'  business  in  the 
City  Hall!  How  sweet  and  peaceful  every- 
thing would  go  on !  The  people  would  n't 
have   to   bother   about  nothin'.   Tammany 

,     would  take  care  of  everything  for  them  in  its 
nice  quiet  way.  You  would  n't  hear  of  any 

^     conflicts  between  the  state  and  city  authori- 
ties. They  would  settle  everything  pleasant 

[122] 


PLUNKITT'S  FONDEST  DREAM 
and  comfortable   at  Tammany   Hall,   and 
every  bill  introduced  in  the  Legislature  by 
Tammany  would  be  sure  to  go  through.  The 
Republicans  would  n't  count. 

"  Imagine  how  the  city  would  be  built  up  in  ^ 
a  short  time!  At  present  we  can't  make  a 
public  improvement  of  any  consequence 
without  goin'  to  Albany  for  permission,  and 
most  of  the  time  we  get  turned  down  when 
we  go  there.  But,  with  a  Tammany  Gov- 
ernor and  legislature  up  at  Fifty-ninth 
Street,  how  public  works  would  hum  here! 
The  mayor  and  aldermen  could  decide  on 
an  improvement,  telephone  the  capitol,  have 
a  bill  put  through  in  a  jiffy  and  —  there  you 
are.  We  could  have  a  state  constitution,  too, 
which  would  extend  the  debt  limit  so  that  we  ■ 
could  issue  a  whole  lot  more  bonds.  As  things 
are  now,  all  the  money  spent  for  docks,  for 
instance,  is  charged  against  the  city  in  cal- 
culatin'  the  debt  limit,  although  the  Dock 

[  US  ] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
Department  provides  immense  revenues. 
It 's  the  same  with  some  other  departments. 
This  humbug  would  be  dropped  if  Tam- 
many ruled  at  the  Capitol  and  the  City  Hall, 
and  the  city  would  have  money  to  burn. 

^  "Another  thing  —  the  constitution  of  the 
new  state  would  n't  have  a  word  about  civil 
service,  and  if  any  man  dared  to  introduce 
any  kind  of  a  civil  service  bill  in  the  Legisla- 
ture, he  would  be  fired  out  the  window.  Then 
we  would  have  government  of  the  people  by 
the  people  who  were  elected  to  govern  them. 
That 's  the  kind  of  government  Lincoln 
meant.  O  what  a  glorious  future  for  the  city ! 
Whenever  I  think  of  it  I  feel  like  goin'  out 
and  celebratin',  and  I  'm  really  almost  sorry 
that  I  don't  drink. 

V  "  You  may  ask  what  would  become  of  the 
up-State  people  if  New  York  City  left  them 
in  the  lurch  and  went  into  the  State  business 
on  its  own  account.  Well,  we  would  n't  be 

[124] 


PLUNKITT'S  FONDEST  DREAM 
under  no  obligation  to  provide  for  them; 
still  I  would  be  in  favor  of  helpin'  them  along 
for  a  while  until  they  could  learn  to  work  and 
earn  an  honest  livin',  just  like  the  United 
States  Government  looks  after  the  Indians. 
These  hayseeds  have  been  so  used  to  livin' 
off  of  New  York  City  that  they  would  be 
helpless  after  we  left  them.  It  would  n't  do  to 
let  them  starve.  We  might  make  some  sort  of 
an  appropriation  for  them  for  a  few  years, 
but  it  would  be  with  the  distinct  under- 
standin'  that  they  must  get  busy  right  away 
and  learn  to  support  themselves.  If,  after, 
say  five  years,  they  were  n't  self-supportin', 
we  could  withdraw  the  appropriation  and  let 
them  shift  for  themselves.  The  plan  might 
succeed  and  it  might  not.  We  'd  be  doin'  our 
duty  anyhow. 

**Some  persons  might  say:  *But  how 
about  it  if  the  hayseed  politicians  moved 
down  here  and  went  in  to  get  control  of  the 

[125] 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY   HALL 

government  of  the  new  state  ? '  We  could 
provide  against  that  easy  by  passin'  a  law 
that  these  politicians  could  n't  come  below 
the  Bronx  without  a  sort  of  passport  limitin' 
the  time  of  their  stay  here,  and  forbiddin' 
them  to  monkey  with  politics  here.  I  don't 
know  just  what  kind  of  a  bill  would  be  re- 
quired to  fix  this,  but  with  a  Tammany  con- 
stitution, governor,  legislature  and  mayor, 
there  would  be  no  trouble  in  settlin'  a  little 
matter  of  that  sort. 

"Say,  I  don't  wish  I  was  a  poet,  for  if  I  was, 
I  guess  I  'd  be  livin'  in  a  garret  on  no  dollars 
a  week  instead  of  runnin'  a  great  contractin' 
and  transportation  business  which  is  doin' 
pretty  well,  thank  you;  but,  honest,  now, 
the  notion  takes  me  sometimes  to  yell  poetry 
of  the  red-hot-hail-glorious-land  kind  when  I 
think  of  New  York  City  as  a  state  by  itself." 


[126] 


Tammany's  patriotism 


''  Tammany's  the  most  patriotic  or- 
ganization on  earth,  notwithstandin'  the  fact 
that  the  civil  service  law  is  sappin'  the 
foundations  of  patriotism  all  over  the  coun- 
try. Nobody  pays  any  attention  to  the  Fourth 
of  July  any  longer  except  Tammany  and  the  ,. 
small  boy.  When  the  Fourth  comes,  the  re-/ 
formers,  with  Revolutionary  names  parted 
in  the  middle,  run  off  to  Newport  or  the  Adi- 
rondacks  to  get  out  of  the  way  of  the  noise 
and  everything  that  reminds  them  of  the 
glorious  day.  How  different  it  is  with  Tam- 
many! The  very  constitution  of  the  Tam- 
many Society  requires  that  we  must  assemble 
at  the  wigwam  on  the  Fgurth,  regardless  of 

[127] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
the  weather,  and  Hsten  to  the  readin'  of  the 
Declaration  of  Independence  and  patriotic 
speeches. 

"You  ought  to  attend  one  of  these  meet- 
in's.  They  're  a  hberal  education  in  pa- 
triotism. The  great  hall  up-stairs  is  filled 
with  five  thousand  people,  suffocatin'  from 
heat  and  smoke.  Every  man  Jack  of  these 
five  thousand  knows  that  down  in  the  base- 
ment there  's  a  hundred  cases  of  champagne 
and  two  hundred  kegs  of  beer  ready  to  flow 
when  the  signal  is  given.  Yet  that  crowd 
stick  to  their  seats  without  turnin'  a  hair 
while,  for  four  solid  hours,  the  Declaration 
of  Independence  is  read,  long-winded  orators 
speak,  and  the  glee  club  sings  itself  hoarse. 

"Talk  about  heroism  in  the  battlefield! 
That  comes  and  passes  away  in  a  moment. 
You  ain't  got  time  to  be  anything  but  heroic. 
But  just  think  of  five  thousand  men  sittin' 
in  the  hottest  place  on  earth  for  four  long 

[128] 


TAMMANY'S  PATRIOTISM 
hours,  with  parched  hps  and  gnawin' 
stomachs,  and  knowin'  all  the  time  that  the 
delights  of  the  oasis  in  the  desert  were  only 
two  flights  down-stairs !  Ah,  that  is  the  high- 
est kind  of  patriotism,  the  patriotism  of 
long  sufferin'  and  endurance.  What  man 
w^ouldn't  rather  face  a  cannon  for  a  minute 
or  two  than  thirst  for  four  hours,  with  cham- 
pagne and  beer  almost  under  his  nose  ? 

"  And  then  see  how  they  applaud  and  yell 
when  patriotic  things  are  said !  As  soon  as  the 
man  on  the  platform  starts  off  with  *when, 
in  the  course  of  human  events,'  word  goes 
around  that  it 's  the  Declaration  of  Inde- 
pendence, and  a  mighty  roar  goes  up.  The 
Declaration  ain't  a  very  short  document 
and  the  crowd  has  heard  it  on  every  Fourth 
but  they  give  it  just  as  fine  a  send-off  as  if  it 
was  brand  new  and  awful  excitin'.  Then  the 
'  long  talkers '  get  in  their  work,  that  is  two  or 
three  orators  who  are  good  for  an  hour  each. 

[129] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
Heat  never  has  any  effect  on  these  men. 
They  use  every  minute  of  their  time.  Some- 
times human  nature  gets  the  better  of  a  man 
in  the  audience  and  he  begins  to  nod,  but  he 
always  wakes  up  with  a  hurrah  for  the  Dec- 
laration of  Independence. 

"The  greatest  hero  of  the  occasion  is  the 
Grand  Sachem  of  the  Tammany  Society 
who  presides.  He  and  the  rest  of  us 
Sachems  come  on  the  stage  wearin'  stove- 
pipe hats,  accordin'  to  the  constitution,  but 
we  can  shed  ours  right  off,  while  the  Grand 
Sachem  is  required  to  wear  his  hat  all 
through  the  celebration.  Have  you  any  idea 
what  that  means  ?  Four  hours  under  a  big 
silk  hat  in  a  hall  where  the  heat  registers  110 
and  the  smoke  250 !  And  the  Grand  Sachem 
is  expected  to  look  pleasant  all  the  time  and 
say  nice  things  when  introducin'  the  speak- 
ers! Often  his  hand  goes  to  his  hat,  uncon- 
scious like,  then  he  catches  himself  up  in 

[130] 


TAMMANY'S  PATRIOTISM 
time  and  looks  around  like  a  man  who  is  in 
the  tenth  story  of  a  burnin'  buildin'  seekin'  a 
way  to  escape.  I  believe  that  Fourth-of-July- 
silk  hat  shortened  the  life  of  one  of  our 
Grand  Sachems,  the  late  Supreme  Court 
Justice  Smyth,  and  I  know  that  one  of  our 
Sachems  refused  the  oflBce  of  Grand  Sachem 
because  he  could  n't  get  up  sufficient  patri- 
otism to  perform  this  four-hour  hat  act.  You 
see,  there  's  degrees  of  patriotism  just  as 
there  's  degrees  in  everything  else. 

"You  don't  hear  of  the  Citizens'  Union 
people  holdin'  Fourth  of  July  celebrations 
under  a  five-pound  silk  hat,  or  any  other 
way,  do  you  ?  The  Cits  take  the  Fourth  like 
a  dog  I  had  when  I  was  a  boy.  That  dog 
knew  as  much  as  some  Cits  and  he  acted  just 
like  them  about  the  glorious  day.  Exactly 
forty-eight  hours  before  each  Fourth  of  July, 
the  dog  left  our  house  on  a  run  and  hid  him- 
self in  the  Bronx  woods.  The  day  after  the 

[131] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
Fourth  he  turned  up  at  home  as  regular  as 
clockwork.  He  must  have  known  what  a 
dog  is  up  against  on  the  Fourth.  Anyhow,  he 
kept  out  of  the  way.  The  name-parted-in-the- 
middle  aristocrats  act  in  just  the  same  way. 
They  don't  want  to  be  annoyed  with  fire- 
crackers and  the  Declaration  of  Indepen- 
dence, and  when  they  see  the  Fourth  comin' 
they  hustle  off  to  the  woods  like  my  dog. 

"  Tammany  don't  only  show  its  patriotism 
at  Fourth  of  July  celebrations.  It 's  always 
on  deck  when  the  country  needs  its  services. 
After  the  Spanish-American  War  broke  out, 

?  John  J.  Scannell,  the  Tammany  leader  of  the 
Twenty-fifth  district,  wrote  to  Governor 
Black  offerin'  to  raise  a  Tammany  regiment 

■^  to  go  to  the  front.  If  you  want  proof,  go  to 
Tammany  Hall  and  see  the  beautiful  set  of 
engrossed  resolutions*  about  this  regiment. 
It 's  true  that  the  Governor  did  n't  accept 

i  the  offer,  but  it  showed  Tammany's  patriot- 


TAMMANY'S  PATRIOTISM 
ism.  Some  enemies  of  the  organization  have 
said  that  the  offer  to  raise  the  regiment  was 
made  after  the  Governor  let  it  be  known  that 
no  more  volunteers  were  wanted,  but  that 's 
the  talk  of  envious  slanderers. 

"Now,  a  word  about  Tammany's  love  for 
the  American  flag.  Did  you  ever  see  Tam- 
many Hall  decorated  for  a  celebration  ?  It 's 
just  a  mass  of  flags.  They  evcu  take  down 
the  window  shades  and  put  flags  in  place  of 
them.  There  's  flags  everywhere  except  on 
the  floors.  We  don't  care  for  expense  where 
the  American  flag  is  concerned,  especially 
after  we  have  won  an  election.  In  1904  we 
originated  the  custom  of  givin'  a  small  flag 
to  each  man  as  he  entered  Tammany  Hall 
for  the  Fourth  of  July  celebration.  It  took 
like  wild-fire.  The  men  waved  their  flags 
whenever  they  cheered  and  the  sight  made 
me  feel  so  patriotic  that  I  forgot  all  about 
civil  service  for  a  while.  And  the  good  work 

[  1^3  ] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY   HALL 

of  the  flags  did  n't  stop  there.  The  men  car- 
ried them  home  and  gave  them  to  the  chil- 
dren, and  the  kids  got  patriotic,  too.  Of 
course,  it  all  cost  a  pretty  penny,  but  what  of 
that  ?  We  had  won  at  the  polls  the  precedin' 
November,  had  the  oflBces  and  could  afford 
to  make  an  extra  investment  in  patriotism. " 


[134] 


ON   THE    USE    OF   MONEY    IN    POLITICS 

1  HE  civil  service  gang  is  always  howlin' 
about  candidates  and  office-holders  puttin' 
up  money  for  campaigns  and  about  cor- 
porations chippin'  in.  They  might  as  well 
howl  about  givin'  contributions  to  churches. 
A  political  organization  has  to  have  money 
for  its  business  as  well  as  a  church,  and  who 
has  more  right  to  put  up  than  the  men  who 
get  the  good  things  that  are  goin'  ?  Take,  for 
instance,  a  great  political  concern  like  Tam- 
many Hall.  It  does  missionary  work  like  a 
church,  it 's  got  big  expenses  and  it 's  got  to 
be  supported  by  the  faithful.  If  a  corporation 
sends  in  a  check  to  help  the  good  work  of 
the  Tammany  Society,  why  should  n't  we 

[135] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
take  it  like  other  missionary  societies?  Of 
course,  the  day  may  come  when  we  '11  reject 
the  money  of  the  rich  as  tainted,  but  it  had  n't 
come  when  I  left  Tammany  Hall  at  11.25  a.m. 
to-day. 

"Not  long  ago  some  newspapers  had  fits 
because  the  Assemblyman  from  my  district 
said  he  had  put  up  $500  when  he  was  nomi- 
nated for  the  Assembly  last  year.  Every  poli- 
tician in  town  laughed  at  these  papers.  I 
don't  think  there  was  even  a  Citizens'  Union 
^  man  who  did  n't  know  that  candidates  of 
both  parties  have  to  chip  in  for  campaign  ex- 
penses. The  sums  they  pay  are  accordin'  to 
their  salaries  and  the  length  of  their  terms 
of  office,  if  elected.  Even  candidates  for  the 
Supreme  Court  have  to  fall  in  line.  A  Su- 
preme Court  Judge  in  New  York  County 
gets  $17,500  a  year,  and  he  's  expected, 
when  nominated,  to  help  along  the  good 
cause  with  a  year's  salary.  Why  not  ?  He  has 

[136] 


MONEY  IN  POLITICS 

fourteen  years  on  the  bench  ahead  of  him, 
and  ten  thousand  other  lawyers  would  be 
willin'  to  put  up  twice  as  much  to  be  in  his 
shoes.  Now,  I  ain't  sayin'  that  we  sell  nomi- 
nations. That 's  a  different  thing  altogether. 
There  's  no  auction  and  no  regular  biddin'. 
The  man  is  picked  out  and  somehow  he  gets 
to  understand  what 's  expected  of  him  in  the 
way  of  a  contribution,  and  he  ponies  up  — 
all  from  gratitude  to  the  organization  that 
honored  him,  see? 

"  Let  me  tell  you  an  instance  that  shows 
the  difference  between  sellin'  nominations 
and  arrangin'  them  in  the  way  I  described. 
A  few  years  ago  a  Republican  district  leader 
controlled  the  nomination  for  Congress  in 
his  Congressional  district.  Four  men  wanted 
it.  At  first  the  leader  asked  for  bids  privately, 
but  decided  at  last  that  the  best  thing  to  do 
was  to  get  the  four  men  together  in  the  back 
room  of  a  certain  saloon  and  have  an  open 

[137] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
auction.  When  he  had  his  men  hned  up,  he 
got  on  a  chair,  told  about  the  value  of  the 
goods  for  sale,  and  asked  for  bids  in  regular 
auctioneer  style.  The  highest  bidder  got  the 
nomination  for  $5000.  Now,  that  was  n't 
right  at  all.  These  things  ought  to  be  always 
fixed  up  nice  and  quiet. 

"As  to  office-holders,  they  would  be  in- 
grates  if  they  did  n't  contribute  to  the  or- 
ganization that  put  them  in  office.  They 
need  n't  be  assessed.  That  would  be  against 
the  law.  But  they  know  what  's  expected  of 
them,  and  if  they  happen  to  forget  they  can 
be  reminded  polite  and  courteous.  Dan 
Donegan,  who  used  to  be  the  Wiskinkie  of 
the  Tammany  Society,  and  received  contri- 
butions from  grateful  office-holders,  had  a 
pleasant  way  of  remindin'.  If  a  man  forgot 
his  duty  to  the  organization  that  made  him, 
Dan  would  call  on  the  man,  smile  as  sweet 
as  you  please  and  say :  *  You  have  n't  been 

[  138  ] 


MONEY  IN  POLITICS 
round  at  the  Hall  lately,  have  you  ? '  If  the 
man  tried  to  slide  around  the  question,  Dan 
would  say:  *  It 's  gettin'  awful  cold. '  Then  he 
would  have  a  fit  of  shiverin'  and  walk 
away.  What  could  be  more  polite  and,  at  the 
same  time,  more  to  the  point  ?  No  force,  no 
threats  —  only  a  little  shiverin'  which  any 
man  is  liable  to  even  in  summer. 

"Just  here,  I  want  to  charge  one  more 
crime  to  the  infamous  civil  service  law.  It  has 
made  men  turn  ungrateful.  A  dozen  years 
ago,  when  there  was  n't  much  civil  service 
business  in  the  city  government,  and  when 
the  administration  could  turn  out  almost  any 
man  holdin'  office,  Dan's  shiver  took  effect 
every  time  and  there  was  no  ingratitude  in 
the  city  departments.  But  when  the  civil 
service  law  came  in  and  all  the  clerks  got 
lead-pipe  cinches  on  their  jobs,  ingratitude 
spread  right  away.  Dan  shivered  and  shook 
till  his  bones  rattled,  but  many  of  the  city 

[139] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
employees  only  laughed  at  him.  One  day,  I 
remember,  he  tackled  a  clerk  in  the  Public 
Works  Department,  who  used  to  give  up 
pretty  regular,  and,  after  the  usual  question, 
began  to  shiver.  The  clerk  smiled.  Dan  shook 
till  his  hat  fell  off.  The  clerk  took  ten  cents 
out  of  his  pocket,  handed  it  to  Dan  and 
said :  *  Poor  man !  Go  and  get  a  drink  to  warm 
yourself  up.'  Wasn't  that  shameful?  And 
yet,  if  it  had  n't  been  for  the  civil  service  law, 
that  clerk  would  be  contributin'  right  along 
to  this  day. 

"The  civil  service  law  don't  cover  every- 
thing, however.  There  's  lots  of  good  jobs 
outside  its  clutch,  and  the  men  that  get  them 
are  grateful  every  time.  I  'm  not  speakin'  of 
Tammany  Hall  alone,  remember!  It  's  the 
same  with  the  Republican  Federal  and  State 
office-holders,  and  every  organization  that 
has  or  has  had  jobs  to  give  out  —  except, 
of  course,  the  Citizens'  Union.  The  Cits  held 

[140  1 


MONEY  IN  POLITICS 
office  only  a  couple  of  years  and,  knowin' 
that  they  would  never  be  in  again,  each  Cit 
office-holder  held  on  for  dear  life  to  every 
dollar  that  came  his  way. 

"Some  people  say  they  can't  understand 
what  becomes  of  all  the  money  that  's 
collected  for  campaigns.  They  would  un-^ 
derstand  fast  enough  if  they  were  district 
leaders.  There  's  never  been  half  enough 
money  to  go  around.  Besides  the  expenses 
for  meetin's,  bands  and  all  that,  there  's  the 
bigger  bill  for  the  district  workers  who  get 
men  to  the  polls.  These  workers  are  mostly 
men  who  want  to  serve  their  country  but  can't 
get  jobs  in  the  city  departments  on  account  of 
the  civil  service  law.  They  do  the  next  best 
thing  by  keepin'  track  of  the  voters  and 
seein'  that  they  come  to  the  polls  and  vote 
the  right  way.  Some  of  these  deservin'  citi- 
zens have  to  make  enough  on  registration 
and  election  days  to  keep  them  the  rest  of  the 

[141] 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

year.  Is  n't  it  right  that  they  should  get  a 
share  of  the  campaign  money  ? 

"Just  remember  that  there  's  thirty-five 
Assembly  districts  in  New  York  County,  and 
thirty-six  district  leaders  reachin'  out  for  the 
Tammany  dough-bag  for  somethin'  to  keep 
up  the  patriotism  of  ten  thousand  workers, 
and  you  would  n't  wonder  that  the  cry  for 
more,  more,  is  goin'  up  from  every  district 
organization  now  and  forevermore.  Amen." 


[142] 


THE    SUCCESSFUL    POLITICIAN    DOES 
NOT    DRINK 

1  HAVE  explained  how  to  succeed  in  poli- 
tics. I  want  to  add  that  no  matter  how  well 
you  learn  to  play  the  political  game,  you 
won't  make  a  lastin'  success  of  it  if  you  're  a 
drinkin'  man.  I  never  take  a  drop  of  any 
kind  of  intoxicatin'  liquor.  I  ain't  no  fanatic. 
Some  of  the  saloon-keepers  are  my  best 
friends,  and  I  don't  mind  goin'  into  a  saloon 
any  day  with  my  friends.  But  as  a  matter  of 
business  I  leave  whisky  and  beer  and  the 
rest  of  that  stuff  alone.  As  a  matter  of  bus- 
iness, too,  I  take  for  my  lieutenants  in  my 
district  men  who  don't  drink.  I  tried  the 
other  kind  for  several  years,  but  it  did  n't 
pay.  They  cost  too  much.  For  instance,  I  had 

[143] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
a  young  man  who  was  one  of  the  best  hust- 
lers in  town.  He  knew  every  man  in  the  dis- 
trict, was  popular  everywhere  and  could 
induce  a  half-dead  man  to  come  to  the  polls 
on  election  day.  But,  regularly,  two  weeks 
before  election,  he  started  on  a  drunk, 
and  I  had  to  hire  two  men  to  guard 
him  day  and  night  and  keep  him  sober 
enough  to  do  his  work.  That  cost  a  lot  of 
money,  and  I  dropped  the  young  man 
after  a  while. 

**  Maybe  you  think  I  'm  unpopular  with 
the  saloon-keepers  because  I  don't  drink. 
You  're  wrong.  The  most  successful  saloon- 
keepers don't  drink  themselves  and  they  un- 
derstand that  my  temperance  is  a  business 
proposition,  just  like  their  own.  I  have  a  sa- 
loon under  my  headquarters.  If  a  saloon- 
keeper gets  into  trouble,  he  always  knows 
that  Senator  Plunkitt  is  the  man  to  help  him 
out.  If  there  is  a  bill  in  the  Legislature  mak- 

[144] 


THE  SUCCESSFUL  POLITICIAN 
in'  it  easier  for  the  liquor  dealers,  I  am  for  it 
every  time.  Im  a  one  of  the  best  friends  the 
saloon  men  have  —  but  I  don't  drink  their 
whisky.  I  won't  go  through  the  temperance 
lecture  dodge  and  tell  you  how  many  bright 
young  men  I  've  seen  fall  victims  to  intem- 
perance; but  I  '11  tell  you  that  I  could  name 
dozens  —  young  men  who  had  started  on 
the  road  to  statesmanship,  who  could  carry 
their  districts  every  time,  and  who  could 
turn  out  any  vote  you  wanted  at  the  pri- 
maries. I  honestly  believe  that  drink  is  the 
greatest  curse  of  the  day,  except,  of  course, 
civil  service,  and  that  it  has  driven  more 
young  men  to  ruin  than  anything  except 
civil  service  examinations. 

"Look  at  the  great  leaders  of  Tammany 
Hall!  No  regular  drinkers  among  them. 
Richard  Croker's  strongest  drink  was  vichy. 
Charlie  Murphy  takes  a  glass  of  wine  at 
dinner  sometimes,  but  he  don't  go  beyond 

[145] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
that.  A  drinkin'  man  would  n't  last  two 
weeks  as  leader  of  Tammany  Hall.  Nor 
can  a  man  manage  an  assembly  district  long 
if  he  drinks.  He  's  got  to  have  a  clear  head  all 
the  time.  I  could  name  ten  men  who,  in  the 
last  few  years,  lost  their  grip  in  their  dis- 
tricts because  they  began  drinkin'.  There  's 
now  thirty-six  district  leaders  in  Tammany 
Hall,  and  I  don't  believe  a  half-dozen  of 
them  ever  drink  anything  except  at  meals. 
People  have  got  an  idea  that  because  the 
liquor  men  are  with  us  in  campaigns,  our 
district  leaders  spend  most  of  their  time  lean- 
in'  against  bars.  There  could  n't  be  a  wronger 
idea.  The  district  leader  makes  a  business 
of  politics,  gets  his  livin'  out  of  it,  and,  in  or- 
der to  succeed,  he  's  got  to  keep  sober  just 
like  in  any  other  business. 

**Just  take  as  examples,  'Big  Tim'  and 
'Little  Tim'  Sullivan.  They're  known  all 
over  the  country  as  the  Bowery  leaders  and, 

[  146  ] 


THE  SUCCESSFUL  POLITICIAN 
as  there  's  nothin'  but  saloons  on  the  Bow- 
ery, people  might  think  that  they  are  hard 
drinkers.  The  fact  is  that  neither  of  them  has 
ever  touched  a  drop  of  liquor  in  his  life  or 
even  smoked  a  cigar.  Still  they  don't  make  no 
pretences  of  bein'  better  than  anybody  else, 
and  don't  go  around  deliverin'  temperance 
lectures.  Big  Tim  made  money  out  of  liquor 
—  sellin'  it  to  other  people.  That 's  the  only 
way  to  get  good  out  of  liquor. 

"Look  at  all  the  Tammany  heads  of  city 
departments !  There  's  not  a  real  drinkin' 
man  in  the  lot.  Oh,  yes,  there  are  some 
prominent  men  in  the  organization  who 
drink  sometimes,  but  they  are  not  the  men 
who  have  power.  They  're  ornaments,  fancy 
speakers  and  all  that,  who  make  a  fine  show 
behind  the  footlights,  but  ain't  in  it  when  it 
comes  to  directin'  the  city  government  and 
the  Tammany  organization.  The  men  who 
sit  in  the  executive  committee-room  at  Tam- 

[147] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

many  Hall  and  direct  things  are  men  who 
celebrate  on  apoUinaris  or  vichy.  Let  me  tell 
you  what  I  saw  on  election  night  in  1897, 
when  the  Tammany  ticket  swept  the  city: 
Up  to  10  P.M.  Croker,  John  F.  Carroll,  Tim 
Sullivan,  Charlie  Murphy,  and  myself  sat  in 
the  committee-room  receivin'  returns.  When 
nearly  all  the  city  was  heard  from  and  we 
saw  that  Van  Wyck  was  elected  by  a  big  ma- 
jority, I  invited  the  crowd  to  go  across  the 
street  for  a  little  celebration.  A  lot  of  small 
politicians  followed  us,  expectin'  to  see  mag- 
nums of  champagne  opened.  The  waiters  in 
the  restaurant  expected  it,  too,  and  you 
never  saw  a  more  disgusted  lot  of  waiters 
when  they  got  our  orders.  Here  's  the  orders : 
Croker,  vichy  and  bicarbonate  of  soda;  Car- 
roll, seltzer  lemonade;  Sullivan,  apollinaris; 
Murphy,  vichy;  Plunkitt,  ditto.  Before  mid- 
night we  were  all  in  bed,  and  next  mornin' 
we  were  up  bright  and  early  attendin'  to  busi- 

[  148  ] 


THE  SUCCESSFUL  POLITICIAN 
ness,  while  other  men  were  nursin'   swelled 
heads.   Is  there  anything  the  matter  with 
temperance  as  a  pure  business  proposition  ?" 


[149] 


BOSSES  PRESERVE  THE  NATION 

When  I  retired  from  the  Senate,  I 
thought  I  would  take  a  good,  long  rest,  such 
a  rest  as  a  man  needs  who  has  held  office  for 
about  forty  years,  and  has  held  four  different 
offices  in  one  year  and  drawn  salaries  from 
three  of  them  at  the  same  time.  Drawin' 
so  many  salaries  is  rather  fatiguin',  you 
know,  and,  as  I  said,  I  started  out  for  a  rest ; 
but  when  I  seen  how  things  were  goin'  in  New 
York  State,  and  how  a  great  big  black 
shadow  hung  over  us,  I  said  to  myself :  '  No 
rest  for  you,  George.  Your  work  ain't  done. 
Your  country  still  needs  you  and  you 
must  n't  lay  down  yet. ' 

"  What  was  the  great  big  black  shadow  ?  It 

[150] 


BOSSES  PRESERVE  THE  NATION 
was  the  primary  election  law,  amended  so  as 
to  knock  out  what  are  called  the  party 
bosses  by  lettin'  in  everybody  at  the  pri- 
maries and  givin'  control  over  them  to  state 
officials.  Oh,  yes,  that  is  a  good  way  to  do  / 
up  the  so-called  bosses,  but,  have  you  ever 
thought  what  would  become  of  the  country 
if  the  bosses  were  put  out  of  business,  and 
their  places  were  taken  by  a  lot  of  cart-tail 
orators  and  college  graduates  ?  It  would 
mean  chaos.  It  would  be  just  like  takin'  a 
lot  of  dry -goods  clerks  and  settin'  them  to  run 
express  trains  on  the  New  York  Central 
Railroad.  It  makes  my  heart  bleed  to  think 
of  it.  Ignorant  people  are  always  talkin' 
against  party  bosses,  but  just  wait  till  the 
bosses  are  gone !  Then,  and  not  until  then, 
will  they  get  the  right  sort  of  epitaphs,  as 
Patrick  Henry  or  Robert  Emmet  said. 

"  Look  at  the  bosses  of  Tammany  Hall  in 
the  last  twenty  years.  What  magnificent  men ! 

[151] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
To  them  New  York  City  owes  pretty  much 
all  it  is  to-day.  John  Kelly,  Richard  Croker, 
and  Charles  F.  Murphy  —  what  names  in 
American  history  compares  with  them, 
except    Washington    and    Lincoln?    They 

^  built  up  the  grand  Tammany  organization, 
and  the  organization  built  up  New  York. 
Suppose  the  city  had  to  depend  for  the  last 
twenty  years  on  irresponsible  concerns  like 
the  Citizens'  Union,  where  would  it  be  now  ? 
You  can  make  a  pretty  good  guess  if  you  re- 
call the  Strong  and  Low  administrations 
when  there  was  no  boss,  and  the  heads  of  de- 
partments were  at  odds  all  the  time  with 
each  other,  and  the  Mayor  was  at  odds  with 

^Z  the  lot  of  them.  They  spent  so  much  time  in 
arguin'  and  makin'  grand-stand  play,  that 
the  interests  of  the  city  were  forgotten.  An- 
other administration  of  that  kind  would  put 
New  York  back  a  quarter  of  a  century. 
*'  Then  see  how  beautiful  a  Tammany  city 

[152] 


BOSSES  PRESERVE  THE  NATION 
government  runs,  with  a  so-called  boss 
directin'  the  whole  shootin'  match !  The  ma- 
chinery moves  so  noiseless  that  you  would  n't 
think  there  was  any.  If  there  's  any  differ- 
ences of  opinion,  the  Tammany  leader  set- 
tles them  quietly,  and  his  orders  go  every 
time.  How  nice  it  is  for  the  people  to  feel  that 
they  can  get  up  in  the  mornin'  without  bein' 
afraid  of  seein'  in  the  papers  that  the  Com- 
missioner of  Water  Supply  has  sandbagged 
the  Dock  Commissioner,  and  that  the  Mayor 
and  heads  of  the  departments  have  been 
taken  to  the  police  court  as  witnesses !  That 's 
no  joke.  I  remember  that,  under  Strong, 
some  commissioners  came  very  near  sand- 
baggin'  one  another. 

"  Of  course,  the  newspapers  like  the  re- 
form administration.  Why  ?  Because  these 
administrations,with  their  daily  rows, furnish 
as  racy  news  as  prize-fights  or  divorce  cases. 
Tammany  don't  care  to  get  in  the  papers.  It 

[153] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY   HALL 
goes  right  along  attendin'  to  business  quietly 
and  only  wants  to  be  let  alone.  That 's  one 
reason  why  the  papers  are  against  us. 

**  Some  papers  complain  that  the  bosses  get 
rich  while  devotin'  their  lives  to  the  interests 
of  the  city.  What  of  it  ?  If  opportunities  for 
turnin'  an  honest  dollar  comes  their  way, 
why  should  n't  they  take  advantage  of  them, 
just  as  I  have  done.?  As  I  said,  in  another 
talk,  there  is  honest  graft  and  dishonest 
graft.  The  bosses  go  in  for  the  former.  There 
is  so  much  of  it  in  this  big  town  that  they 
would  be  fools  to  go  in  for  dishonest  graft. 

"  Now,  the  primary  election  law  threatens 
to  do  away  with  the  boss  and  make  the  city 
government  a  menagerie.  That 's  why  I 
can't  take  the  rest  I  counted  on.  I  'm  goin' 
to  propose  a  bill  for  the  next  session  of  the 
legislature  repealin'  this  dangerous  law,  and 
leavin'  the  primaries  entirely  to  the  organiza- 
tions themselves,  as  they  used  to  be.  Then 

[154] 


BOSSES  PRESERVE  THE  NATION 
will  return  the  good  old  times,  when  our  dis- 
trict leaders  could  have  nice  comfortable 
primary  elections  at  some  place  selected  by 
themselves  and  let  in  only  men  that  they 
approved  of  as  good  Democrats.  Who  is  a  \/ 
better  judge  of  the  Democracy  of  a  man  who 
offers  his  vote  than  the  leader  of  the  district  ? 
Who  is  better  equipped  to  keep  out  unde- 
sirable voters  ? 

"  The  men  who  put  through  the  primary 
law  are  the  same  crowd  that  stand  for  the 
civil  service  blight  and  they  have  the  same 
objects  in  view  —  the  destruction  of  gov- 
ernments by  party,  the  downfall  of  the  con- 
stitution and  hell  generally." 


[155] 


CONCERNING    EXCISE 


'  'Although  I  'm  not  a  drinkin'  man 
myself,  I  mourn  with  the  poor  hquor  dealers 
of  New  York  City,  who  are  taxed  and  op- 
pressed for  the  benefit  of  the  farmers  up 
the  state.  The  Raines  liquor  law  is  infamous. 
It  takes  away  nearly  all  the  profits  of  the 
saloon-keepers,  and  then  turns  in  a  large  part 
of  the  money  to  the  State  treasury  to  relieve 
the  hayseeds  from  taxes.  Ah,  who  knows 
how  many  honest,  hard-workin'  saloon- 
keepers have  been  driven  to  untimely 
graves  by  this  law!  I  know  personally  of  a 
half-dozen  who  committed  suicide  because 
they  could  n't  pay  the  enormous  license  fee, 
and  I  have  heard  of  many  others.   Every    I 

[156] 


CONCERNING  EXCISE 
time  there  is  an  increase  of  the  fee,  there  is 
an  increase  in  the  suicide  record  of  the  city. 
Now,  some  of  these  Republican  hayseeds  are 
talkin'  about  makin'  the  liquor  tax  $1500,  or 
even  $2000  a  year.  That  would  mean  the 
suicide  of  half  of  the  liquor  dealers  in  the 
city. 

"Just  see  how  these  poor  fellows  are  op- 
pressed all  around!  First,  liquor  is  taxed  in 
the  hands  of  the  manufacturer  by  the  United 
States  Government;  second,  the  wholesale 
dealer  pays  a  special  tax  to  the  government; 
third,  the  retail  dealer  is  specially  taxed  by 
the  United  States  Government;  fourth,  the 
retail  dealer  has  to  pay  a  big  tax  to  the  State 
government. 

"  Now,  liquor  dealing  is  criminal  or  it  ain't. 
If  it 's  criminal,  the  men  engaged  in  it  ought 
to  be  sent  to  prison.  If  it  ain't  criminal,  they 
ought  to  be  protected  and  encouraged  to 
make  all  the  profit  they  honestly  can.  If  it 's 

[  157  ] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
right  to  tax  a  saloon-keeper  $1000,  it 's 
right  to  put  a  heavy  tax  on  dealers  in  other 
beverages  —  in  milk,  for  instance  —  and 
make  the  dairymen  pay  up.  But  what  a 
howl  would  be  raised  if  a  bill  was  intro- 
duced in  Albany  to  compel  the  farmers  to 
help  support  the  State  government!  What 
would  be  said  of  a  law  that  put  a  tax  of,  say 
$60  on  a  grocer,  $150  on  a  dry-goods  man, 
and  $500  more  if  he  includes  the  other  goods 
that  are  kept  in  a  country  store  ? 
\/  **If  the  Raines  law  gave  the  money  ex- 
torted from  the  saloon-keepers  to  the  city, 
there  might  be  some  excuse  for  the  tax.  We 
would  get  some  benefit  from  it,  but  it  gives  a 
big  part  of  the  tax  to  local  option  localities 
where  the  people  are  always  shoutin'  that 
liquor-dealin'  is  immoral.  Ought  these  good 
people  be  subjected  to  the  immoral  influ- 
ence of  money  taken  from  the  saloons  — 
tainted  money  ?  Out  of  respect  for  the  tender 

[158] 


CONCERNING  EXCISE 
consciences  of  these  pious  people,  the 
Raines  law  ought  to  exempt  them  from  all 
contamination  from  the  plunder  that  comes 
from  the  saloon  traflSc.  Say,  mark  that  sar- 
castic. Some  people  who  ain't  used  to  fine 
sarcasm  might  think  I  meant  it. 

"The  Raines  people  make  a  pretense  that 
the  high  license  fee  promotes  temperance. 
It 's  just  the  other  way  around.  It  makes 
more  intemperance  and,  what  is  as  bad,  it 
makes  a  monopoly  in  dram-shops.  Soon  the 
saloons  will  be  in  the  hands  of  a  vast  trust, 
and  any  stuff  can  be  sold  for  whisky  or , 
beer.  It 's  gettin'  that  way  already.  Some  of 
the  poor  liquor  dealers  in  my  district  have 
been  forced  to  sell  wood  alcohol  for  whisky, 
and  many  deaths  have  followed.  A  half-dozen 
men  died  in  a  couple  of  days  from  this  kind 
of  whisky  which  was  forced  down  their 
throats  by  the  high  liquor  tax»  If  they  raise 
the  tax  higher,  wood  alcohol  will  be  too 

[159] 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
costly,  and  I  guess  some  dealers  will  have  to 
get  down  to  kerosene  oil  and  add  to  the 
Rockefeller  millions. 

**  The  way  the  Raines  law  divides  the  dif- 
ferent classes  of  licenses  is  also  an  outrage. 
The  sumptuous  hotel-saloons,  with  $10,000 
paintin's  and  bricky-brac  and  Oriental  splen- 
dors gets  off  easier  than  a  shanty  on  the 
rocks,  by  the  water's  edge  in  my  district 
where  boatmen  drink  their  grog,  and  the  only 
ornaments  is  a  three-cornered  mirror  nailed 
to  the  wall,  and  a  chromo  of  the  fight  between 
Tom  Hyer  and  Yankee  Sullivan.  Besides,  a 
premium  is  put  on  places  that  sell  liquor  not 
to  be  drunk  on  the  premises,  but  to  be  taken 
home.  Now,  I  want  to  declare  that  from  my 
experience  in  New  York  City,  I  would  rather 
see  rum  sold  in  the  dram-shops  unlicensed, 
provided  the  rum  is  swallowed  on  the  spot, 
than  to  encourage,  by  a  low  tax,  'bucket- 
shops'  from  which  the  stuff  is  carried  into 

[160] 


CONCERNING   EXCISE 

the  tenements  at  all  hours  of  the  day  and 
night  and  make  drunkenness  and  debauch- 
ery among  the  women  and  children.  A 
*  bucket-shop '  in  the  tenement  district  means 
a  cheap,  so-called  distillery,  where  raw 
spirits,  poisonous  colorin'  matter  and  water 
are  sold  for  brandy  and  whisky  at  ten  cents 
a  quart,  and  carried  away  in  buckets  and 
pitchers ;  I  have  always  noticed  that  there  are 
many  undertakers  wherever  the  *  bucket- 
shop'  flourishes,  and  they  have  no  dull 
seasons. 

"  I  want  it  understood  that  I  'm  not  an  ad- 
vocate of  the  liquor  dealers  or  of  drinkin'.  I 
think  every  man  would  be  better  off  if  he 
did  n't  take  any  intoxicatin'  drink  at  all,  but 
as  men  will  drink,  they  ought  to  have  good 
stuff  without  impoverishin'  themselves  by 
goin'  to  fancy  places  and  without  riskin' 
death  by  goin'  to  poor  places.  The  State 
should  look  after  their  interests  as  well  as 

[161] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

the   interests   of   those   who  drink  nothin' 
stronger  than  milk. 

"  Now,  as  to  the  Hquor  dealers  themselves. 
They  ain  't  the  criminals  that  cantin'  hypo- 
crites say  they  are.  I  know  lots  of  them  and  I 
know  that,  as  a  rule,  they  're  good  honest 
citizens  who  conduct  their  business  in  a 
straight,  honorable  way.  At  a  convention  of 
the  liquor  dealers  a  few  years  ago,  a  big  city 
city  oflScial  welcomed  them  on  behalf  of  the 
city  and  said :  *  Go  on  elevatin'  your  standard  | 
higher  and  higher.  Go  on  with  your  good 
work.  Heaven  will  bless  you ! '  That  was  put- 
tin'  it  just  a  little  strong,  but  the  sentiment 
was  all  right  and  I  guess  the  speaker  went  a 
bit  further  than  he  intended  in  his  enthusi-l 
asm  over  meetin'  such  a  fine  set  of  men  and,] 
perhaps,  dinin'  with  them." 


[162] 


A   PARTING   WORD    ON  THE   FUTURE   OF  THE 
DEMOCRATIC   PARTY  IN  AMERICA 

1  HE  Democratic  party  of  the  nation  ain't 
dead,  though  it 's  been  givin'  a  HfeUke  imi- 
tation of  a  corpse  for  several  years.  It  can't 
die  while  its  got  Tammany  for  its  backbone. 
The  trouble  is  that  the  party's  been  chasin' 
after  theories  and  stayin'  up  nights  readin' 
books  instead  of  studyin'  human  nature  and 
actin'  accordin',  as  I  've  advised  in  tellin' 
how  to  hold  your  district.  In  two  Presiden- 
tial campaigns,  the  leaders  talked  themselves 
red  in  the  face  about  silver  bein'  the  best 
money  an  gold  bein'  no  good,  and  they 
tried  to  prove  it  out  of  books.  Do  you  think 
the  people  cared  for  all  that  guff  ?  No.  They 
heartily  indorsed  what  Richard  Croker  said 

[1631 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

at  the  Hoffman  House  one  day  in  1900. 
*  What 's  the  use  of  discussin'  what 's  the 
best  kind  of  money  ? '  said  Croker.  *  I  'm  in 
favor  of  all  kinds  of  money  — -  the  more  the 
better. '  See  how  a  real  Tammany  statesman 
can  settle  in  twenty-five  words  a  problem 
that  monopolized  two  campaigns! 

"Then  imperialism.  The  Democratic 
party  spent  all  its  breath  on  that  in  the  last 
national  campaign.  Its  position  was  all  right, 
sure,  but  you  can't  get  people  excited  about 
the  Philippines.  They  've  got  too  much  at 
home  to  interest  them;  they  're  too  busy 
makin'  a  livin'  to  bother  about  the  niggers  in 
the  Pacific.  The  party  's  got  to  drop  all  them 
put-you-to-sleep  issues  and  come  out  in 
1908  for  somethin'  that  will  wake  the  people 
up;  somethin'  that  will  make  it  worth  while 
to  work  for  the  party. 

"  There  's  just  one  issue  that  would  set  this 
country    on    fire.    The    Democratic    party 

[164] 


A  PARTING  WORD 
should  say  in  the  first  plank  of  its  platform : 
*We  hereby  declare,  in  national  convention 
assembled,  that  the  paramount  issue  now, 
always  and  forever,  is  the  abolition  of  the 
iniquitous  and  villainous  civil  service  laws 
which  are  destroyin'  all  patriotism,  ruinin' 
the  country  and  takin'  away  good  jobs  from 
them  that  earn  them.  We  pledge  ourselves,  if 
our  ticket  is  elected,  to  repeal  those  laws  at 
once  and  put  every  civil  service  reformer  in 
jail.' 

"Just  imagine  the  wild  enthusiasm  of  the 
party,  if  that  plank  was  adopted,  and  the 
rush  of  Republicans  to  join  us  in  restorin' 
I  our  country  to  what  it  was  before  this  col- 
lege professor's  nightmare,  called  civil  ser- 
vice reform,  got  hold  of  it!  Of  course,  it 
would  be  all  right  to  work  in  the  platform 
some  stuff  about  the  tariff  and  sound  money 
and  the  Philippines,  as  no  platform  seems 
to    be   complete  without    them,    but    they 

[165] 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

would  n't  count.  The  people  would  read  only 
the  first  plank  and  then  hanker  for  election 
day  to  come  to  put  the  Democratic  party  in 
office. 

**  I  see  a  vision.  I  see  the  civil  service  mon- 
ster lyin'  flat  on  the  ground.  I  see  the  Demo- 
cratic party  standin'  over  it  with  foot  on  its 
neck  and  wearin'  the  crown  of  victory.  I  see 
Thomas  Jefferson  lookin'  out  from  a  cloud 
and  sayin':  'Give  him  another  sockdologer; 
finish  him. '  And  I  see  millions  of  men  wav- 
in'  their  hats  and  singin'  'Glory  Halle- 
lujah!'" 


[166] 


STRENUOUS    LIFE     OF    THE    TAMMANY 
DISTRICT     LEADER 

Note — This  chapter  is  based  on  extracts  from  Plunkitt's 
Diary  and  on  my  daily  observation  of  the  work  of  the  district 
leader.— W.  L.  R. 

1  HE  life  of  the  Tammany  district  leader 
is  strenuous.  To  his  work  is  due  the  wonder- 
ful recuperative  power  of  the  organization. 

One  year  it  goes  down  in  defeat  and  the 
prediction  is  made  that  it  will  never  again 
raise  its  head.  The  district  leader,  un- 
daunted by  defeat,  collects  his  scattered 
forces,  organizes  them  as  only  Tammany 
knows  how  to  organize,  and  in  a  little  while 
the  organization  is  as  strong  as  ever. 

No  other  politician  in  New  York  or  else- 
where is  exactly  like  the  Tammany  district 

[167] 


PLUNKITT  OP  TAMMANY  HALL 
leader  or  works  as  he  does.  As  a  rule,  he  has 
no  business  or  occupation  other  than  poli- 
tics. He  plays  politics  every  day  and  night 
in  the  year,  and  his  headquarters  bears  the 
inscription,  **  Never  closed. " 

Everybody  in  the  district  knows  him. 
Everybody  knows  where  to  find  him,  and 
nearly  everybody  goes  to  him  for  assistance 
of  one  sort  or  another,  especially  the  poor  of 
the  tenements. 

He  is  always  obliging.  He  will  go  to  the 
police  courts  to  put  in  a  good  word  for  the 
*'  drunks  and  disorderlies  "  or  pay  their  fines, 
if  a  good  word  is  not  effective.  He  will 
attend  christenings,  weddings,  and  funerals. 
He  will  feed  the  hungry  and  help  bury  the 
dead. 

A  philanthropist  ?  Not  at  all.  He  is  playing 
politics  all  the  time. 

Brought  up  in  Tammany  Hall,  he  has 
learned  how  to  reach  the  hearts  of  the  great 

[  168  ] 


THE  TAMMANY  DISTRICT  LEADER 
mass  of  voters.  He  does  not  bother  about 
reaching  their  heads.  It  is  his  behef  that  ar- 
guments and  campaign  literature  have  never 
gained  votes. 

He  seeks  direct  contact  with  the  people, 
does  them  good  turns  when  he  can,  and  re- 
lies on  their  not  forgetting  him  on  election 
day.  His  heart  is  always  in  his  work,  too, 
for  his  subsistence  depends  on  its  results. 

If  he  holds  his  district  and  Tammany  is  in 
power,  he  is  amply  rewarded  by  a  good 
oflBce  and  the  opportunities  that  go  with  it. 
_  What  these  opportunities  are  has  been 
shown  by  the  quick  rise  to  wealth  of  so 
many  Tammany  district  leaders.  With  the 
examples  before  him  of  Richard  Croker, 
once  leader  of  the  Twentieth  District ;  John 
F.  Carroll,  formerly  leader  of  the  Twenty- 
ninth ;  Timothy  ("Dry  Dollar")  Sullivan,  late 
leader  of  the  Sixth,  and  many  others,  he  can 
always    look   forward    to    riches    and   ease 

[169] 


I 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
while  he  is  going  through  the  drudgery  of  his 
daily  routine. 

This  is  a  record  of  a  day's  work  by 
Plunkitt : 

2  A.M. :  Aroused  from  sleep  by  the  ringing 
of  his  door  bell ;  went  to  the  door  and  found 
a  bartender,  who  asked  him  to  go  to  the 
police  station  and  bail  out  a  saloon-keeper 
who  had  been  arrested  for  violating  the  ex- 
cise law.  Furnished  bail  and  returned  to  bed 
at  three  o'clock. 

6  A.M. :  Awakened  by  fire  engines  passing 
his  house.  Hastened  to  the  scene  of  the  fire, 
according  to  the  custom  of  the  Tammany 
district  leaders,  to  give  assistance  to  the  fire 
sufferers,  if  needed.  Met  several  of  his  elec- 
tion district  captains  who  are  always  under 
orders  to  look  out  for  fires,  which  are  con- 
sidered great  vote-getters.  Found  several 
tenants  who  had  been  burned  out,  took 
them  to  a  hotel,  supplied  them  with  clothes, 

[170] 


THE  TAMMANY  DISTRICT  LEADER 
fed  them,  and  arranged  temporary  quarters 
for  them  until  they  could  rent  and  furnish 
new  apartments. 

8.30  A.M. :  Went  to  the  police  court  to  look 
after  his  constituents.  Found  six  "drunks." 
Secured  the  discharge  of  four  by  a  timely 
word  with  the  judge,  and  paid  the  fines  of 
two. 

9  A.M. :  Appeared  in  the  Municipal  Dis- 
trict Court.  Directed  one  of  his  district  cap- 
tains to  act  as  counsel  for  a  widow  against 
whom  dispossess  proceedings  had  been  in- 
stituted and  obtained  an  extension  of  time. 
Paid  the  rent  of  a  poor  family  about  to  be 
dispossessed  and  gave  them  a  dollar  for 
food. 

11  A.M. :  At  home  again.  Found  four  men 
waiting  for  him.  One  had  been  discharged  by 
the  Metropolitan  Railway  Company  for 
neglect  of  duty,  and  wanted  the  district 
leader  to  fix  things.  Another  wanted  a  job  on 

[171] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

the  road.  The  third  sought  a  place  on  the 
Subway  and  the  fourth,  a  plumber,  was  look- 
ing for  work  with  the  Consolidated  Gas 
Company.  The  district  leader  spent  nearly 
three  hours  fixing  things  for  the  four  men, 
and  succeeded  in  each  case. 

3  P.M. :  Attended  the  funeral  of  an  Italian 
as  far  as  the  ferry.  Hurried  back  to  make  his 
appearance  at  the  funeral  of  a  Hebrew  con- 
stituent. Went  conspicuously  to  the  front  both 
in  the  Catholic  church  and  the  synagogue, 
and  later  attended  the  Hebrew  confirmation 
ceremonies  in  the  synagogue. 

7  P.M. :  Went  to  district  headquarters  and 
presided  over  a  meeting  of  election  district 
captains.  Each  captain  submitted  a  list  of  all 
the  voters  in  his  district,  reported  on  their 
attitude  toward  Tammany,  suggested  who 
might  be  won  over  and  how  they  could  be 
won,  told  who  were  in  need,  and  who  were  in 
trouble  of  any  kind  and  the  best  way  to  reach 

[  172] 


THE  TAMMANY   DISTRICT   LEADER 
them.  District  leader  took  notes  and  gave 
orders. 

8  P.M. :  Went  to  a  church  fair.  Took  chances 
on  everything,  bought  ice-cream  for  the  young 
girls  and  the  children.  Kissed  the  little  ones, 
flattered  their  mothers  and  took  their  fathers 
out  for  something  down  at  the  corner. 

9  P.M. :  At  the  club-house  again.  Spent  $10 
on  tickets  for  a  church  excursion  and  prom- 
ised a  subscription  for  a  new  church-bell. 
Bought  tickets  for  a  base-ball  game  to  be 
played  by  two  nines  from  his  district.  Lis- 
tened to  the  complaints  of  a  dozen  push- 
cart peddlers  who  said  they  were  persecuted 
by  the  police  and  assured  them  he  would  go 
to  Police  Headquarters  in  the  morning  and 
see  about  it. 

10.30  p.  M. :  Attended  a  Hebrew  wedding 
reception  and  dance.  Had  previously  sent 
a  handsome  wedding  present  to  the  bride. 

12  P.M. :  In  bed. 

[173] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

That  is  the  actual  record  of  one  day  in  the 
life  of  Plunkitt.  He  does  some  of  the  same 
things  every  day,  but  his  life  is  not  so  mo- 
notonous as  to  be  wearisome. 

Sometimes  the  work  of  a  district  leader  is 
exciting,  especially  if  he  happens  to  have  a 
rival  who  intends  to  make  a  contest  for  the 
leadership  at  the  primaries.  In  that  case, 
he  is  even  more  alert,  tries  to  reach  the  jBres 
before  his  rival,  sends  out  runners  to  look 
for  "  drunks  and  disorderlies' '  at  the  police 
stations,  and  keeps  a  very  close  watch  on  the 
obituary  columns  of  the  newspapers. 

A  few  years  ago  there  was  a  bitter  contest 
for  the  Tammany  leadership  of  the  Ninth 
district  between  John  C.  Sheehan  and 
Frank  J.  Goodwin.  Both  had  had  long  ex- 
perience in  Tammany  politics  and  both  un- 
derstood every  move  of  the  game. 

Every  morning  their  agents  went  to  their 
respective  headquarters  before  seven  o'clock 

[  174  ] 


THE  TAMMANY  DISTRICT  LEADER 

and  read  through  the  death  notices  in  all  the 
morning  papers.  If  they  found  that  anybody 
in  the  district  had  died,  they  rushed  to  the 
homes  of  their  principals  with  the  informa- 
tion and  then  there  was  a  race  to  the  house  of 
the  deceased  to  offer  condolences,  and,  if  the 
family  were  poor,  something  more  sub- 
stantial. 

On  the  day  of  the  funeral  there  was  an- 
other contest.  Each  faction  tried  to  surpass 
the  other  in  the  number  and  appearance  of 
the  carriages  it  sent  to  the  funeral,  and  more 
than  once  they  almost  came  to  blows  at  the 
church  or  in  the  cemetery. 

On  one  occasion  the  Goodwinites  played  a 
trick  on  their  adversaries  which  has  since 
been  imitated  in  other  districts.  A  well- 
known  liquor  dealer  who  had  a  considerable 
following  died,  and  both  Sheehan  and  Good- 
win were  eager  to  become  his  political  heir 
by  making  a  big  showing  at  the  funeral. 

[175]    . 


PLUNKITT   OF  TAMMANY  HALL 

Goodwin  managed  to  catch  the  enemy 
napping.  He  went  to  all  the  livery  stables  in 
the  district,  hired  all  the  carriages  for  the 
day,  and  gave  orders  to  two  hundred  of  his 
men  to  be  on  hand  as  mourners. 

Sheehan  had  never  had  any  trouble  about 
getting  all  the  carriages  that  he  wanted,  so  he 
let  the  matter  go  until  the  night  before  the 
funeral.  Then  he  found  that  he  could  not 
hire  a  carriage  in  the  district. 

He  called  his  district  committee  together 
in  a  hurry  and  explained  the  situation  to 
them.  He  could  get  all  the  vehicles  he  needed 
in  the  adjoining  district,  he  said,  but  if  he  did 
that,  Goodwin  would  rouse  the  voters  of  the 
Ninth  by  declaring  that  he  (Sheehan),  had 
patronized  foreign  industries. 

Finally,  it  was  decided  that  there  was 
nothing  to  do  but  to  go  over  to  Sixth  Avenue 
and  Broadway  for  carriages.  Sheehan  made  a 
fine  turnout  at  the  funeral,  but  the  deceased 

[176] 


I 


THE  TAMMANY  DISTRICT   LEADER 

was  hardly  in  his  grave  before  Goodwin 
raised  the  cry  of  **  Protection  to  home  indus- 
tries, "  and  denounced  his  rival  for  patroniz- 
ing livery-stable  keepers  outside  of  his  dis- 
trict. The  cry  had  its  effect  in  the  primary 
campaign.  At  all  events,  Goodwin  was  elect- 
ed leader. 

A  recent  contest  for  the  leadership  of  the 
the  Second  district  illustrated  further  the 
strenuous  work  of  the  Tammany  district 
leaders.  The  contestants  were  Patrick  Div- 
ver,  who  had  managed  the  district  for  years, 
and  Thomas  F.  Foley. 

Both  were  particularly  anxious  to  secure 
the  large  Italian  vote.  They  not  only  attend- 
ed all  the  Italian  christenings  and  funerals, 
but  also  kept  a  close  lookout  for  the  mar- 
riages in  order  to  be  on  hand  with  wedding 
presents. 

At  first,  each  had  his  own  reporter  in  the 
Italian  quarter  to  keep  track  of  the  mar- 

[  177  ] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
riages.  Later,  Foley  conceived  a  better  plan. 
He  hired  a  man  to  stay  all  day  at  the  City 
Hall  marriage  bureau,  where  most  Italian 
couples  go  through  the  civil  ceremony,  and 
telephone  to  him  at  his  saloon  when  any- 
thing was  doing  at  the  bureau. 

Foley  had  a  number  of  presents  ready  for 
use  and,  whenever  he  received  a  telephone 
message  from  his  man,  he  hastened  to  the 
City  Hall  with  a  ring  or  a  watch  or  a  piece  of 
silver  and  handed  it  to  the  bride  with  his  con- 
gratulations. As  a  consequence,  when  Div- 
ver  got  the  news  and  went  to  the  home  of  the 
couple  with  his  present,  he  always  found  that 
Foley  had  been  ahead  of  him.  Toward  the 
end  of  the  campaign,  Divver  also  stationed  a 
man  at  the  marriage  bureau  and  then  there 
were  daily  foot  races  and  fights  between  the 
two  heelers. 

Sometimes  the  rivals  came  into  conflict  at 
the  death-bed.  One  night  a  poor  Italian  ped- 

[178] 


THE  TAMMANY  DISTRICT  LEADER 
dler  died  in  Roosevelt  Street.  The  news 
reached  Divver  and  Foley  about  the  same 
time,  and  as  they  knew  the  family  of  the 
man  was  destitute,  each  went  to  an  under- 
taker and  brought  him  to  the  Roosevelt  Street 
tenement. 

The  rivals  and  the  undertakers  met  at  the 
house  and  an  altercation  ensued.  After  much 
discussion  the  Divver  undertaker  was  se- 
lected. Foley  had  more  carriages  at  the  fu- 
neral, however,  and  he  further  impressed  the 
Italian  voters  by  paying  the  widow's  rent  for 
a  month,  and  sending  her  half  a  ton  of  coal 
and  a  barrel  of  flour. 

The  rivals  were  put  on  their  mettle  toward 
the  end  of  the  campaign  by  the  wedding  of  a 
daughter  of  one  of  the  original  Cohens  of  the 
Baxter  Street  region.  The  Hebrew  vote  in 
the  district  is  nearly  as  large  as  the  Italian 
vote,  and  Divver  and  Foley  set  out  to  cap- 
ture the  Cohens  and  their  friends. 

[179] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
They  stayed  up  nights  thinking  what  they 
would  give  the  bride.  Neither  knew  how 
much  the  other  was  prepared  to  spend  on  a 
wedding  present,  or  what  form  it  would 
take;  so  spies  were  employed  by  both  sides 
to  keep  watch  on  the  jewelry  stores,  and  the 
jewelers  of  the  district  were  bribed  by  each 
side  to  impart  the  desired  information. 

At  last  Foley  heard  that  Divver  had  pur- 
chased a  set  of  silver  knives,  forks  and 
spoons.  He  at  once  bought  a  duplicate  set 
and  added  a  silver  tea  service.  When  the 
presents  were  displayed  at  the  home  of  the 
bride,  Divver  was  not  in  a  pleasant  mood  and 
he  charged  his  jeweler  with  treachery.  It  may 
be  added  that  Foley  won  at  the  primaries. 
One  of  the  fixed  duties  of  a  Tammany  dis- 
trict leader  is  to  give  two  outings  every  sum- 
mer, one  for  the  men  of  his  district,  and  the 
other  for  the  women  and  children  and  a 
beefsteak  dinner  and  a  ball  every  winter. 

[180] 


THE  TAMMANY   DISTRICT   LEADER 

The  scene  of  the  outings  is,  usually,  one  of 
the  groves  along  the  Sound. 

The  ambition  of  the  district  leader  on 
these  occasions  is  to  demonstrate  that  his 
men  have  broken  all  records  in  the  matter  of 
eating  and  drinking.  He  gives  out  the  exact 
number  of  pounds  of  beef,  poultry,  butter, 
etc.,  that  they  have  consumed  and  professes 
to  know  how  many  potatoes  and  ears  of  corn 
have  been  served. 

According  to  his  figures,  the  average  ekt- 
ing  record  of  each  man  at  the  outing  is  about 
ten  pounds  of  beef,  two  or  three  chickens,  a 
pound  of  butter,  a  half  peck  of  potatoes,  and 
two  dozen  ears  of  corn.  The  drinking  records, 
as  given  out,  are  still  more  phenomenal.  For 
some  reason,  not  yet  explained,  the  district 
leader  thinks  that  his  popularity  will  be 
greatly  increased  if  he  can  show  that  his 
followers  can  eat  and  drink  more  than  the 
followers  of  any  other  district  leader. 

[181] 


PLUNKITT  OF  TAMMANY  HALL 
The  same  idea  governs  the  beefsteak  din- 
ners in  the  winter.  It  matters  not  what  sort 
of  steak  is  served  or  how  it  is  cooked ;  the  dis- 
trict leader  considers  only  the  question  of 
quantity,  and  when  he  excels  all  others  in 
this  particular,  he  feels,  somehow,  that  he  is 
a  bigger  man  and  deserves  more  patronage 
than  his  associates  in  the  Tammany  Execu- 
tive Committee. 

As  to  the  balls,  they  are  the  events  of  the 
winter  in  the  extreme  East  Side  and  West 
Side  society.  Mamie  and  Maggie  and  Jennie 
prepare  for  them  months  in  advance,  and 
their  young  men  save  up  for  the  occasion 
just  as  they  save  for  the  summer  trips  to 
Coney  Island. 

The  district  leader  is  in  his  glory  at  the 
opening  of  the  ball.  He  leads  the  cotillion 
with  the  prettiest  woman  present  —  his 
wife,  if  he  has  one,  permitting  —  and  spends 
almost  the  whole  night  shaking  hands  with 

[182] 


THE  TAMMANY  DISTRICT  LEADER 

his  constituents.  The  ball  costs  him  a  pretty 
penny,  but  he  has  found  that  the  investment 
pays. 

By  these  means  the  Tammany  district 
leader  reaches  out  into  the  homes  of  his  dis- 
trict, keeps  watch  not  only  on  the  men,  but 
q-lso  on  the  women  and  children;  knows 
their  needs,  their  likes  and  dislikes,  their 
troubles  and  their  hope^  and  places  himself 
in  a  position  to  use  his  knowledge  for  the 
benefit  of  his  organization  and  himself.  Is  it 
any  wonder  that  scandals  do  not  perma- 
nently disable  Tammany  and  that  it  speed- 
ily recovers  from  what  seems  to  be  crushing 
defeat  ? 

THE  END 


THE     MOCLURE     PRESS,     NEW    YORK 


\f4 


UNIVERSITY  OF  CALIFORNIA  LIBRARY 

Los  Angeles 

This  book  is  DUE  on  the  last  date  stamped  below. 


IJATE  SENT 


muD  ^P^oimf 


^!^•> 


<^  iF^^ 


ifLL, 


^  JCt^ 


-\ 


SEP  2  4  2004 


li^EKS  rROM 


4\Ny^vJUH3  02J«S 


APR  2  8  2005 


■^ 


r-^... 


'■'fjf; 


OCT  ?,  ^  Z004 


^ov  0 1 2flof 


DAT, 

APR  I  5  Z005 


DUE  3  VvttKi.  FROM 
DATE  RECEIVED 


r 


^1 


..-^ 


315 


t^r 


fnii 


3   1158  00268  7845 


